can bestfriends turn into lovers?!?
By puzzleover
@puzzleover (20)
Philippines
June 22, 2009 12:16am CST
I have a friend who currently admitted that she loves her guy bestfriend, she's afraid of telling him so because she didnt want to end their friendship for almost 8 years. She did'nt know if her guy bestfriend also love her, but then, she feel that her guy besfriend likes her too because of his actions and words. She didnt know what to do. They are still friends, and they sometimes hangouts, but then this past few months, they no longer see each other in a while. What's the best thing she will do? tell the guy? or keep her secret forever eventhough she's hurting to much about the situation?
4 people like this
32 responses
@theptcnetworks (575)
• Pitcairn
22 Jun 09
I think you should be honest with yourself, with what you feel I mean. A real best friend is hard to find, and build. But what will you do if he's really your one true love? I know a lot of stories, not just stories but it really happens in reality.
If you really feel that you love him, say it or just let him feel you. As what you've said, you feel that he likes you too because of his actions, I mean he is trying to tell you his feelings. But just make sure that you're not misinterpreting him coz there are instances that someone in love with somebody gets the wrong idea on every single thing that somebody does to someone.
Reassess what really is your feeling. Is it really love? If feel that it really is, go for it. Fight for it. Feel no regrets in the end.
1 person likes this
@sudiptacallingu (10879)
• India
22 Jun 09
I think she should just go ahead and tell him...I have heard of many such cases where none could go ahead and tell the truth and they have regretted for the rest of their lives.
If she goes ahead and tells him there can either be two situations - either he will reject her or they will be happy together. In either case, somebody has to say first...there is no shame in admitting that you love somebody...even if she is rejected, at least she will not have to live with the regret that she never told him. At least her mind will be clear to herself.
1 person likes this
@silverglint (2000)
• Philippines
22 Jun 09
I believe that love starts with friendship. though it is a lot harder for your friend since she is the girl and usually its the guys who are suppose to make the first move. Its still up to her if she has the courage to ask him, they are, after all, quite close. I don't think there is anything wrong with her falling for him. At least once she is able to talk to him about it, she knows what to do, because it either moves to the next level or they just remain friends. she will not be left wondering how the guy feels about her and suffer in silence.
1 person likes this
@wangchunxia (701)
• China
8 Jul 09
for me ,yes, my boyfriend is my classmate,before he is my bestfriend!
@ddfreedie (690)
• India
22 Jun 09
love is an extended friendship...true friendship arrives when two people share common interest sharing and understanding...love also has all the above qualities ...hence i'd say true friends are highly suceptable to love bond...
happy mylotting
1 person likes this
@babshish (1387)
• India
22 Jun 09
Well this is a tuff situation, whch needs to be handled by taking all pros and cons. Basically I feel both of them have stopped seeing each other because either of them is having some feeling which is not as usual which they used to share earlier. So I would suggest your friend to atleast give a try and tell her feeling, else for life long she will regret of not telling. There might be a chance that the other person also has the same feeling and hesitating to say, and this wiill lead to nowhere and both of them will only remain friends. So just give it a try and convience the other person that even if he don't have that feeling the friendship will remain as it is.
1 person likes this
@chenxiaoyue_713 (2165)
• China
23 Jun 09
Hi, puzzleover. Your friend is now under a real tough situation because love is a delicate matter that needs to be handled properly. If not, they two can no longer be friends, let alone lovers. There are many cases around us that best friends end up lovers, and of course, there are also some end up strangers. But everyone should be confident in himself/herself, and make best efforts to do everything, including looking for a lover. So my suggestions for your friend is at least she should give it a try. She can confide her feelings to her male friend at the proper time. If the other part has the same feeling for her, it'll be great. If he just treats her as a bestfriend, he may tell her what he feels for her in a mild way so as not to hurt her. Then your friend should be wise not to mention the topic again.
Wish your friend luck!
@daryljane (3406)
• Philippines
23 Jun 09
Most of the best friend thing that took the leap to lovers didnt end well. But theres always an exception for that..they maybe one of those exceptions. Sometimes, things are better of just being friends. if she love her best friend, maybe she wait for the guy if he has the same feelings for her. Things is, if she tell him and he doesnt reciprocate, it might ruin the friendship. Ruined in the sense that it willbe awkward for them to act as themselves knowing that one of them have feelings other than friendship. She might get hurt for betrayal because he might like someone else and doesnt tel her because he is afraid that she might take it differently and when he find out about it, it will be a different situation. I dont think she want that either. Just tell here to stick around and wait for the guy to tell her what he feels.
@pratheep87 (1227)
• India
29 Jun 09
Yes best friends can turn lover and they can be a good couple. I have seen many best friends turning lovers and they had been a good couple. But some dont mingle love and friendship.
@kmaram (2533)
• Philippines
23 Jun 09
Why not? I believe that if your having a good foundation like friendship first this will end up in a nice lovers relationship. Just be true to your feelings, better tell your friend before its too late. Better to take the consequenes now and whatever the outcome just be positive. And if you will not end as lovers hope your friendship will still there. Well goodluck to your friend and hope they will end as lovers =)
@strawberrybaby39 (2086)
• United States
23 Jun 09
I would talk to to him to see how he feels about her. I grew up with a guy and his sister every sense I was a kid. And I had a baby to him. But he had a lot of problems he had to deal with in his life and to fix so we split up. But we are still best friends. If I was your friend I wouldn't hold the hurt inside I would talk to him and see if he feels the same as she does.
@halfcrack (11)
• India
23 Jun 09
actually..i dont know..but,there situations where best friends turns lovers..
best friends are those persons who can understand us..be with us..helps us in al ways they could..
as far as im considered my love is my best friend..
but it is not a friendship that turned to love..
@cookiecrumbles (629)
• United States
23 Jun 09
Since most of my friends are guys they do turn into lovers. lol
@rogue13xmen13 (14403)
• United States
23 Jun 09
Yes, many people have. I had a few friends who were best-friends who turned into lovers.
@smileonstar (4007)
• United States
22 Jun 09
First thing, she needs to find out if he is not currently involve with any girl, cuz they haven't talk for a few months already... if between them is getting closer and closer then she can tell him how she feels about him. However, if thing change... then she doesn't have to tell, just hold on to it and see if he acts something else different.
For me, I dont like to tell the guy how I feel cuz I am afraid he might take over me. Of course I want to love in return but I dont want to get hurt later. I will act like I like him and will see if he does the same back to me. If he doesn't then make him loves u more and more then he will tell you right the way. Man hate to wait or hold on to thing that they want to tell... believe me, if he really love u then no matter what happened he will come to u.
@charlenmendoza (922)
• Philippines
23 Jun 09
its nice if your husband or wife is also your bestfriend, you have open communications. but then again it will be difficult if you fall in love with your bestfriend and the other cannot reciprocate the others feeling. But if i were her, im going to talk to him and tell him what she feels but when she do that, she is willing to accept whatever happen. she might get what she wants or she might lose her bestfriend. Goodluck to her.
@pxm204192 (160)
• China
22 Jun 09
there are a lot of the accident in the life in all of the people,though the long time they are getting along with, what things do you meet with? i mean that the true things can test their love, truely, there are seldom changes to test true love, my friends have a love story of 18 years, you guess the last result,they are no successful to lover,they are separation of the love, i think that the long time of love can not be sure to success to become a lover,on the contrary,with the long time with your lover,you can see a lot of weakpoints between them, the ratio of the successful is little by little with the pass time, this process is very nature to all of us,according to my experience of the love
@callamy520 (14)
• China
23 Jun 09
for my experience, my best friends did not come to be my lovers at last.
@fernandezmindoro (146)
• United States
22 Jun 09
I'd say tell the guy. I was once in that situation and now I am married to my best "guy friend" and we've been together for almost nine years now. If we hadn't exchange how we felt about each other, then we wouldn't be in such a wonderful place than we are now. Together we have three wonderful children and live a strong christian life.So my opinion is don't lose out on something that could've been there...
![](/Content/images/loading.gif)