What can you do?

I think you should talk your partners in the right way. Don't sacrifice your children in the manner of your partner are. If your partner not listen to you. Try to talk some of his friends or relatives that respect him. or try to ask help with any priest, ministers, or pastor in a church to talk with your partner. Ask advice from them to help you with this matter. It is really hard to have that kind of partner. We need to consider about what happen and what frustration he is right now. Drink too much is not good. It maybe risking his health, his family and his children...I wish you found the right answer on your problem.

hold on margajoe... have you tried talking to him about this things? why not get some counseling? but i think the best that you can do is to pray for him...ask for God's help in guiding your family and for him to realize all those bad things that he's doing... same situation happens to my mom, long time ago...the situation really tests my mom's patience and love for my father...i always saw them fighting and my mom crying...they almost broke up! but a minister in our church helps them, for my mom ask for it...he talks to my parents and do some counseling...he advices them to pray and ask for God's help to fix things up in their relationship...i saw my mom praying every night before sleep with tears in her eyes... when i ask her what she's asking to God, she told me that she's asking for my father to realize that he's doing bad and hope that he will change for the better!...it don't come that easy, but my mom didn't loose hope...she just keep on praying...and i am happy to tell you that my father is a completely new person now, he have changed for the better and now they live together smoothly, peacefully and happily... so i guess God really listens...and nothing beats the power of prayer... i hope that you can still fix things up in your relationship and hope that your husband will change for the better... God bless...

There are only two ways…tolerate or leave him. Rude as I may sound, I KNOW there is no other middle path. I have seen guys being counseled by family, friends, actual counselors, de-addiction centres…everything has been tried to make them give up the bottle but NO…they somehow think their manhood flows alongwith the booze…I have seen families breaking, I have seen wives being abused (they have nowhere to go simply coz they are not financially independent and society expects them to accept such husbands and carry on)…I have seen children being negatively affected…but nothing seems to affect these guys! So if you can, either leave him to his bottle or just keep mum and tolerate…at least as long as you don’t open you mouth, you’ll have some peace. And yes, build a strong bond with you kids…they would be your only source of sustenance in life.

Wow..it must be hard to go through all that..if divorce is available at your place, it is a choice i guess..but a risk as well.

Joe have you tried asking him the reason for this behavior? there must be something bothering him if its only lately that he have been doing this? If he is not yet ready to tell you then I think just give him time but if this is his vise then there is nothing you can do about it my friend... only g=he can stop this vise of his but if it is not a vice then try asking him whats bothering him lately why he have taken things for granted lately... Joe as a friend only you can try to solve this coz only you know the whole story and the emotions involve in this relationship but I am always here as your friend willing to listen if you need an ear i will give you both my ears ... stay strong and hope you are ok as of now and pls eat something .... dont over do diet ok...

I think you are doing right thing but it will not work. I have seen many examples in my life too. You are remaining patient that's good thing but along with remaining patient you should make your partner feel that how you are feeling about him when he drinks and how everyone around you and him might be feeling about him. Even make let him know what your kids feels when they saw him drinking. You should do these things when is totally conscious mean not drunken. Hope it will help you up to certain extent!! Best of Luck

It's really bad when they don't care that their children see them drunk. There are things you can do. Find your nearest Al-Anon meeting so you have support and they can also help you in terms of how to handle what you're going through with your partner. Here's the link to Al-Anon. http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/

I think you should stop him from drinking because every time he does everything turns out bad and this cannot be let to continue and go on.It i better to clear one rather than letting that one to clear all.The best thing is to sacrifice him instead of letting the job and children to be sacrificed.

Smoking and drinking are both very annoying problems. It is not easy for an adult to quit from them.Sometimes you should persuade your partner to listen to the doctor's advice. Meanwhild you should attract their attentions to other focus.

first of all, it will be difficult life in this situation. feel like love and hate collide. my suggestion is please talk to your partner, tell him/her your feeling, worried, and worse thing might be happened to your family. if your partner don't respond, it's your choice, but i would prefer to leave him/her. thanks.

You have to decide what is best for you and your children at this important time in your lives. If a partner will not get help and overcome the addiction, things just keep getting worse and worse. Life is precious and should not be spent in an unhappy or dangerous situation. Best wishes with this! Karen

Respect is one of the most important thing to keep in a relationship. Without respect, it can never workout. You need to talk to your man and tell him how you feel. Let him know you won't tolerate his drinking anymore as it affects others especially the kids. If he doesn't respect your wishes for your sake or the kids, then I think you should let him go.