Adopted children, is there a difference. do you think the child should know that

i personally feel that the adopted child should know of its origin - after all its his/her rights to know. And it s always better to tell the kid that he/she is adopted before anyone else spills it to them as a news - think of the psychology then. However, i don't appreciate those families that do not treat the adopted kid like their own. - Then on the fist go why did they adopt the child - for the society? One of my aunt has adopted a girl child when their son was 4 years old. We are all happy that none treat the kid as a 3rd party child and we have all accepeted as a part of the family :)

Never, ever, ever keep this sort of information from a child. I speak as one who is adopted, whose adoption was closed, thereby barring me from any sort of real information about my birthparents. Have I felt abandoned? Yes. I can't tell you how angry I've been at my birth mother--for years, I was very bitter. It's only now that I've started to let it go. Do I want to find my birth mother? Absolutely not...she can go rot in a dumpster for all I care. What I want is to find out such things as heritage and medical history. That's it--I don't want to meet her, because there would be words exchanged, especially on my part. Yeah...this is a touchy subject for me. Yes, a child should be told the circumstances surrounding his/her birth. To not tell them would be damaging to them psychologically, even more so than if you did tell them. Okay...I'm off my soapbox. Sorry for the rant.

Yes, of course there will be some difference at least. But we have to keep the person informed of the fact, that is always better. There is an age to tell the truth to the child.

i guess so. parents should tell their adopted child the truth at the proper time. and they should treat him or her like their own child. every parent who plans to adopt a child should realize that it involves physical, financial and moral obligations not only to the state but to God. they should take care of the adopted child like what they do with their own children, if any.

Yes, I think the child should know, as young as possible. My friends adopted a baby from Russia, and they told him as soon as he was old enough to understand and talk. He'll be 8 next month, and he tells the story of how he came to America and got his parents...he loves to tell it! If they find out later in life, sometimes there is bitterness. This boy, Nicolas, is an only child with them, so I couldn't answer the part about their own children, since they don't have any. Take care!

I think a child should know when they get to be preteens or teenagers.. This is the time where they are really trying to find out who they are.. And if that part is missing is hard to really figure it out.. I know that it would hurt the child at first but at the same time understand why he or she does not look like the rest of the family.. That is probably a question the child has already had, either spoke of that or just kept it to his or her self. If I would have an adopted child I would try to explain it with the up most care.. and deep thought.. And be ready for any reaction that the child may have.. Try to have the answer there waiting for him or her when they are asked.. And if the child really wants to find their birth parents I would do my best to help them find them... It is better for a child to find out while they are at home, there sacred ground versus when they are 18 and they are an adult and feel lost.. Granted they had a home, and a family all of their live but to take the place of birth parents..Well there is a volid there that can not be filled by anything else..

I believe that the child deserve to know that he/she is adopted at an early age to avoid confusions and rebelion and hatred when they grow up . The adoptive parent's should explain to the child as clearly as possible about his roots and make an effort or try harder to let the child know that he/she is loved and appreciated eventhough he/she is not a biological child. I dont think it should make a difference weather the child is adopted or not and adoptive parents have the responsibility of treating that child as their own and give equal care and attention to both biological and adopted children.People who couldnt do this or are not willing to do so should not be allowed to adopt.

I believe that an adopted child should know he or she is adopted. But timing is the key here. In a proper time when the child understands and can comprehend regarding this then that is the time he should know. Nothing is kept in secret for a long time it will be soon out in the open and it will be very disastrous if they learned it from others.

There are differnt types of adoption to consider. For example, aside from the well-known open and closed adoption of a child that is from a totally different family, there is also the adoption of step-children to consider. In any case, I think that if the child begins to ask any questions, they should be answered honestly, yet simply. In the case of open adoption, the child may want the information of his/her biological parents so he/she can pursue the biological parent for whatever reason. In the case of a closed adoption, I think that the child's questions should be answered as simply and honestly as possible. In the case of a atep-child adoption, the child will likely know about it when it happens, so there may be less questions. Whatever the case may be, I feel that honesty is the m ost important, and in addition, the adoptive parents should really be careful not to belittle the biological parents when talking about them and the situation. Doing that inhibits the child from later making his/her own decision about the biological parents, and it can also cause the child to feel inadequate because of that biological link. Do I think that it would effect the child psychologically? Yes, I think that is inevitable, but that doesn't mean that it has to effect him/her adversely. The key to having a positive effect is for the adoptive parents to always do their best to treat any and all children in the household eqqually.

I do believe that a parent should inform their children that they are adopted once they are old enough to understand the concept. It's got to be difficult on a child to go through life thinking they are biologically related to their parents only to find out by accident, or even on purpose, that they aren't related. Adopted kids will often lash out and have behavioral problems that causes them to sever all ties with their adoptive family for not telling the child that they were adopted and the biological family for giving the child up for adoption. But for some, there could be safety issues involved. The biological parents could be in prison, a substance abuser or a rapist or something. While it is difficult when the reasons for adoption hinged on safety issues, if those issues are no longer a concern from an adoptees standpoint it could be extremely benefiicial to have a connection to a birth parent at an older age. But if they start asking questions about him, then I would allow them to meet them if possible and if the adoptive and the bio parents agree to it.

For me, i will let my adopted child to know that he/she is adopted. First because they will feel it, even if you dont tell it to them, most especially when you have kids. I am not adopted child but i know their are feelings of emptiness to them. Longing and looking for certain things or feelings that they cant explain. Second reason why do you need to tell them, as the saying goes, whatever deepest secret you have it will come out in the open. And when they it know a little bit longer, it will betrayal for them. I hope i make sense.

When the family decided to adopt child , they should treat them well... depends on the real situaiton to judge tell him the truth or not.....

I think adopted child should not know about it, that he or she is adopted. But when he or she reached to an age when he or she can understand all these things.So we shoud tell the reality behind his birth. Whene he will come to know all about he his psychology will change.

adoption i feel is an act of love and great courage..so kudos to the paretnts who go in for adoptions!i think parents must treat such children as their own and more than materialistic joy provide them the affection of a mother and a father..because thats what these children really crave for..if they cant treat them equally well as they treat their own child..might as well not adopt them..they were better off in the orphanage!orphans are a beauty in thier own way and i dont think they deserve any injustice..also after they reach the adult age they must be informed about thier adoption..its better they are known to it from you'll rather than someone outside the family..:)