Some parents pass their responsibilities to thier eldest child.....
By Azaerus
@Azaerus (820)
Philippines
July 2, 2009 6:50am CST
I know a person who is suffering because of her living status..her father was a former contractor and her mom was a plain housewife..she didn't get along with her parents that much because she feels she does all the work..her father's attitude is worst attitude I've seen...hmm why??the reason is because her father is very strict when it deals with money,sometimes her father even gets mad when she and her siblings ask for money for their projects...that's why she hated her father that much and from then she never asked mone from her father ever again..when her father got hospitalized she did everything to pay for his medical bills..she did everything to find where to get money..it all ended up with her having a huge amount od debt..her mother had to find a work to help her and her mother did find a work but only with a very minimal wage which woudn't help that much..this person have to give half of her salary every month to the person she had borrowed the money..after that hospital incident,everything got worse..her mom had to work overtime almost everyday eventhough the salary is still the same...the result she had to take care of her siblings everyday after her callcenter work..she had to do the dishes,laundry and cleaning...and her mom seems blind with everything that's happening..and her fathers attitude is still the same he even have the guts to complain whenever they're out of food..I worry for this person because she is currently pregnant and she's having this big responsibility that her parents are supposed to be doing...:(
1 person likes this
6 responses
@meandmy3 (2227)
• United States
2 Jul 09
Sometimes life's circumstances puts us in a position to take care of our parents, she made the decision to take on his medical bills, she could have left it alone and allowed her parents to handle this debt themselves and honestly they should not have asked her to take on this task, as she is young and this could ruin her credit. They had other options, I am surprised that a social worker at the hospital did not take the time to work with them and explain some things they could have done to help with the debt and resolve it in a different manner.
I hope that your friend is able to get out from under this situation and move to a better place so that she can raise her child without the overbearing eyes of her father.
@Azaerus (820)
• Philippines
2 Jul 09
Actually she also came forward to the social service but she didn't get any help at all..I hope the same thing too..she already has done alot..and she had to pay because they don't have any other options..if she choses to leave his father in the hospital their hospital bill will increase and increase,and they won't release his father until the bill is payed..in the future if that happened she'll have bigger problems..anyways,I hope someday her life will be easier on her..I really hope things do get better for her..
@Azaerus (820)
• Philippines
3 Jul 09
Actually it is a private hospital and most of the hospitals here in our country are so strict when it comes with money so they made a rule that the patient who haven't paid his or her bills will stay in the hospital until the bill have been paid..so sad actually but true..
@Theresaaiza (10487)
• Australia
3 Jul 09
She is pitiful. I am touched by stories like these, and saddened at the same time. I also grew up believing that within a family, we play different roles but we work as a team (although some of the guys here don't put much importance to teamwork by being plain lazy. Haha. I am guilty of that too). And for me, even without being dictated upon, and even if i am not really the eldest, I do take responsibility for whatever's going in the house. Financially, chores-wise, sometimes emotionally, also in the discipline area, etc. I guess there are just things that we do for the family. Yes, our own happiness can be compromised too in the process.
What I admire from your friend is that she showed concern which is one sign that she isn't an insensitive jerk. I agree that her parents do have shortcomings, and shall I say, "defects" and it's probably due to a lot of factors. I guess your friend must one day go for her own happiness and live for her own life. She has done her part.
1 person likes this
@Azaerus (820)
• Philippines
3 Jul 09
Actually she is on of the most hardworking person I know...unlike other pregnant woman who chooses to stay at home and relax she still chose to work in the callcenter despite her situation..her work is abit tough,her schedule always change..most of the times she have to work until midnight or until 2 or 3 am in the morning...I tell her that sometimes she also have to stop a while and take a rest but she still insist to work and even take some overtimes..I really do admire her being responsible..I hope someday when I'm going to have my own family I'm gonna be as responsible as she is..
@mobhomeir (7558)
• Philippines
3 Jul 09
I am sorry for your friend. She's really having a very big problem which supposedly not really hers. You said your friend is pregnant, what her husband said about this situation? I mean she has her own family too to attend with and yet as if she focus all her attention to her parents...even me after I finish reading this, don't know what to do If I am at your friend's situation...What a pity...
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@Azaerus (820)
• Philippines
3 Jul 09
Actually the one who got her pregnant is not yet her husband and he's also not around because he's a seaman so he have to work in other places all the time...he haven't got much to do right now..it's really going to be a big problem because she's going to have her own family now and with this situation of hers I really want to help her but I don't know how because it's more of thier family matters..
1 person likes this
@jshekhar (1562)
• India
2 Jul 09
Hello friend,
We see such stories all the time in our society. Parents are not too caring towards the younger children, especially when they are females. I salute the girl who still went out of her way to take care of her ailing father. I hope parents are a bit less biased towards their own children.
1 person likes this
@Azaerus (820)
• Philippines
2 Jul 09
It's really sad why some parents turn out this way...they should be giving their children good future not the other way around..I hate it when things like this happes specially to somebody I know..that's why like you I really salute her and adore her being responsible because eventhough her parents are like this she still respects them and supports them because one way or another they are still her parents..I hope her parents could see her like we do..
@aerous (13434)
• Philippines
3 Jul 09
..i think not all...but if your parents get separated i think that's the time that the eldest must take charge the responsibility that their parents can't....the eldest must be a responsible one....if your in father's side u must do the responsibility of being a mother, but if your in mother side you must take charge on the responsibility of being a father and as eldest.....you must be patient cause its to hard to be a father and a mother for your sister and brother if they doesn't understand yet....
1 person likes this
@cutifyjenny (110)
• Philippines
3 Jul 09
i know there are parents is very strick about here children especially the eldest child if the eldest is there is work told her to ask money then the parents is tell about the financial problem then the eldests shoulder the problemthen the other child is tell about the other project for example buy a rice the then the parent tell the other person u find a job coz we have many project in my house the work of the house is helping in my family especially on sunday we clean our house .
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