MONEY or LOVE.??
By janebeth
@janebeth (2032)
Philippines
July 16, 2009 11:50pm CST
hi my lot friends,
i badly need your advice, i don't know what to do.. please give me your advice on what will i do..
i have a long time boyfriend but he is still looking for a job right now but then there is this guy who courts me, he is a professional one.. my parents like my BF but then they are looking for my future, the problem is i don't really like this professional guy. seems his parents are so strict, will i stick to this guy (my BF)whom i love so much but i think i don't have a future or with this guy (professional)whom can give me a better life in the future.?? help me please...!! thanks for the advice...
1 person likes this
21 responses
@khayshenz (1384)
• United States
17 Jul 09
Well - if you really love him (your bf) like you say you do, then you won't leave him for all kinds of cash in the world. You already said that you don't even like the professional guy - then why are you considering him? Just because he makes money?
So you think your bf will not work hard enough to make you happy or to keep you afloat?
So are you saying that you'd rather have a financially rich life and be miserable than be happy and be poor?
If your bf truly loves you - he'll do anything he can not only to find a job, but find a career. Not only to make you happy but to make sure that your life together will be comfortable.
Good luck!
@khayshenz (1384)
• United States
17 Jul 09
Well you need to tell him - and assure him that you're not leaving him IF YOU TRULY LOVE HIM. I don't even see why you're considering the other guy - other than for money. *Shrugs*
@neildc (17239)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
17 Jul 09
hi jane. what pushes you to get involved with a guy you do not love? if you don't like him, then put him down. if you love your boyfriend that much, then wait till he gets a nice job. it is so difficult to get married without enough money. but if you have money or the one courts you has lots of it but you have no love for him, forget about him... neil
1 person likes this
@tamarafireheart (15384)
•
17 Jul 09
Hi janebeth,
I would say my dear is to follow your heart, after all its love that counts, what use of money when you are not happy and don't love the person, you will have to spend your life with the person you don't love? no, so the best thing is to follow your heart and be with the peron you love and tell this person woth money to go, love is the only thing that matters, that is my advice.
Tamara
@srganesh (6340)
• India
17 Jul 09
If your boyfriend is a qualified person and sincerely searching for jobs,then you have to believe him and remain a mental and moral support for him out of love.But if he is not responsible and just spending his time then you need not support him.
The professional man can any time lose his career in this recession world.So,don't go for him for just social security.You are now in a dilemma and this is not the right time to take decisions.Wait for some time and everything will be alright.Cheers!
@meganlynn425 (27)
• United States
17 Jul 09
There shouldnt even be a doubt in your mind, the way this was written you heart is completely with your boyfriend. Money can only buy so much, but not full happiness. Just take the love you have with your boyfriend and dont let anything get in the way of that. Everything will fall together just pray Good Luck
@nicanorr (1789)
• Philippines
17 Jul 09
janebeth, are you really decided to tie the marriage knot with this guy you loved most? Yes? Really? Swear before the god of thunder that you really are serious. Then tell him bluntly your plans. It doesn't matter who tags first the helm of the marriage proposal. What is vital is the consummation of your relationship. You should reap the fruits of you toil by this time. Remember time is fast fleeting by. You are not always fresh and fragrant. Tell him to decide say 7 days, if he fails then you have all the reasons to disqualify him. He should in that 7-day span of time decide, crush you in his arms and fight and live up for his emotions for you notwithstanding the consequence. You have nothing to fear for you have now the real him and you and your true feelings for each other. From the scratch you and him can now build your castle of dreams to better your future. With your loves combined. there is nothing impossible. Bear in mind love can move mountains.
The advice are lifted from the pages of my life. My wife and me got married at age 22 and she 20. With hand-to-mouth existence, we tried to tide over problems. For 9 solid years, we went to finish college and education courses for both of us. I taught for 10 years as Elem. Grades Teacher
eand transferred to the DILG until my retirement in 2002, She retires as a teacher in 2001. Our children 5 of them are happy and contented in their chosen profession: 2 nurses, 1 assistant civil registrar and the youmngest a boy a successful businessman.
1 person likes this
@prashanthalva (2272)
• India
17 Jul 09
My Dear ....... Dont worry too much About Anything .. Everything That Has To happen will Happen ... Relax And follow The Path which you feel is Right ...... Thank You .. Do lot On MyLot ...........
@eLsMarie (4345)
• Philippines
23 Jul 09
actually it all depends to you... how sure are you that you won't regret marrying the guy whom who think can give you a better future... i don't think your current BF doesn't have any plans of living a better life because right he's already looking for a stable job... it's just so happen that your current BF hasn't any job for him to earn a living but later on, i'm sure that he will... :)
@phesaru (300)
• Philippines
17 Jul 09
Your parents cant decide to your future bcoz your old now and thats your future which is they can only advice you..just follow your heart although this guy you love is don't have a work for now but he can find it and try his best to make your futures good.Anyway this is only an advice but still the answer to you if who would you choose and who you think can give you happiness =D happy myLotting
@stricken43 (347)
• Philippines
17 Jul 09
stick to whatever yo think is best for you besides its your life not theirs..there might be regrets in the future but because you are there to support each other, then, regrets will no exist..one thing more, you said he's been doing job hunting, then at least he is doing something just for your parents to like him..its always you who have to decide for yourself, the opinions of others are important, but they are just cues, the final decision is in your hands, if you think, you are happy with your BF, then, dont leave him..thats all..hehe
@writeonme (20)
• United States
18 Jul 09
I can't fault you for thinking about your future, but you did say that you don't really like this professional guy. Who cares if he can take care of you later on and your unhappy. You might find yourself wanting to leave him for the man you like now. If you don't love him it would end at somepoint then you wouldn't have the person you truely cared about to being with or the money from the professional man. Think about these things before you do anything you may regret.
@dreamangel01 (187)
• United States
18 Jul 09
Love, who knows maybe you and your man (the one who doesnt have a job) will figure out how to make it big and then you would have money and love but with the other guy you would just have money and be unhappy and if you dont love him now you more than likely wont love him ever. Good luck!
@Joyce114 (1)
• China
18 Jul 09
it is my first time come to mylot and this article it's the first one see!
i think maybe you already know how to choose,but in my mind ,in the world ,money is so important ,if you choose one who can't give you comfortable life ,time and time ,you 'll feel he is the worst one you love .But if you choose money you 'll say that you are unhappay !so the most thing is to let your bf to earn money ,and then you can get married .i hope you can choose what you really want !!
@hotchocolate (849)
• Philippines
18 Jul 09
Interesting... yup just like everyone, follow your heart, it will forever be there and you wont be completely happy if you choose the other guy. But, try to give a hint to your BF, talk to him, talk about your future with him and tell him indirectly that you guys need to build your future as early as now
@nikhil_bhasin2007 (101)
• India
17 Jul 09
if u really love ur boyfriend then dont get confused....just marry him....if u really love him then every hurdle will be cleared....be with him everytime in good times as well as in bad times.....dont worry about future...be with the one u love the most
@steelkhan (177)
• Sharjah, United Arab Emirates
18 Jul 09
if you want an advice then it is only one from me and that is your Boy Friend, what future or better life are you talking about you don't even like the {professional} guy and you are talking about spending your life with him. what if after your marriage with (Prof)guy your BF gets a job and becomes a rich man you will come back to him just because now he is rich. you want help from us but you are the only one who can help your self, but if you really want help then remember these three words and you will know what to do. "LOVE IS LIFE"
@abenitez (501)
• United States
17 Jul 09
If you really love your boyfriend then you need to stay with him. Money can buy a lot of things, but in can not buy happiness. You clearly love your boyfriend and it sounds like he is actively looking for a job. He will not be unemployed forever. You need to follow your heart because you can have a lot of money and material things and still be miserable.
Good Luck!