When choosing a partner, which would you listen to: your heart or your mind?

to be or not to be? your topic made me remind the saying. it's really hard to choose. however we human being always can find the reseaonalbe excuse to persude ourselves to keep the balance between our mind and our heart. first i will listen to my mind and do a few analysis, then later when i really do my choice i will listen to my heart. if i didn't listen to my heart and made a choice i don't think i will feel happy. if i don't feel happy with the choice, what's the meaning to against my own heart. life is too short. i promise myself always listen to my heart to decide my life.

I think its the heart who choose a partner and we simply cant control our heart from loving someone. But heart never see if the loved one is a good or bad character person so we have to use our mind . To sum up, i mean to say your heart will itself choose to whome it loves but you have to use your mind if your heart is right . Happy mylotting!

Both. If it`s really very important, life-changing decision -then i analyze the relation very deeply inside. In fact I am emotional and very sensitive, but i need really a serious reason to allow my emotions to flow away. Just i have been hurted too much. Have a nice day:)

i agree that allowing hearts to rule over mind is disastrous. heart usually dictates when you fall in love. but you need to have a grip on it. let the mind work more when deciding. happy mylotting. ann

Hello incredibleDNA, When choosing a partner, in my experience the first thing that kicks in is the heart, and so beings the phase of infatuation with the person, where they seem to be perfect in every possible way, and you cannot get them out of your mind. However, this joy-ride comes to a startling stop when the common sense begins to kick in and the mind begins to pick up "the little things" about the person which make you tick. It then makes you question the whole idea of choosing this particular person as a partner, and only if you think you can deal with the "ticking factors" then it allows your conscience to comfortably choose said partner for your own. In my case, I listen to both my heart and my mind when choosing a partner. :) Thanks for sharing, good luck and happy myLotting!

My friend had asked me this one time and I had told her what I am about to tell you. Love is never selfless, its in fact very selfish. We want to be loved back more than we actually love someone. When choosing a partner, we first think with our heads. It happens subconciously and involuntarily. We gauge the person on everything we want in a partner. Now everyone has a tolerance level, so if the person fits within that tolerance level, we overlook/ignore the differences or negative points. Now all this is happening behind the scenes while we are busy looking at them ! You say credit score and all that stuff, but tell me if a guy comes along in a torn out clothes, unclean rather lets say a beggar comes and starts a conversation with a well to do middle class girl, would she even stay there for more than a second? No. There are so many criminals we know of through out history, who wooed young girls and killed them or robbed them or whatever, if you look at them, there was one thing common, all of them were charming, clean and basically looking well to do! There is no such thing as heart, its only your brain that feels, thinks and even does stuff. When it is subtle or lacks reason for your thoughts, you call it that your heart is responsible ..lols

Its not easy what you will follow sometimes because it is a turn of mind and heart. Personally i am more on my mind. Asking myself if i am willing to spend time with this person. If i am willing to accept what he is. If i am willing to change or adjust myself for him. If i am willing to work with him in our differences. If this person have some similarity to my personality. If this person willing to adjust for me too. If this person gets angry easily or not. If this person is honest. After of this question and and if the answer is yes, i am much more to follow my mind and heart will follows. If my mind agrees with it, my heart too. Even my heart fall in love with the person but my mind do not agree with it, it could not be love, and it is easy for me to escape and look for another.

It has to be both. If your heart isn't in it, it's just an arrangement far as I'm concerned. But if your head is telling you something isn't right, you don't understand each other, respect each other, etc., that's even worse. If there is a lack of understanding, you will eventually lose the love.

I say we must listen to both.we need to think and feel about our prospective partner.it is not enough that we only use the heart,because in reality,the heart doesn't see the practical side of things.the heart is mainly concerned with the emotions.the mind will see the logical and practical side of things.falling in love can make someone think illogically,which is why some people tolerate abuse from their partners.

How is that working out for you? I understand your thinking but most of the time it doesnt work that way. Have you ever heard the saying "You can lead a heart to love but you cant make it fall". The heart wants what the heart wants. There is no rhyme or reason to matters of the heart. You can find someone that is perfect on paper but there isnt a "spark" between the two of you. How happy will you be? Love and life are difficult. A lot of people end up cheating because there isnt that "spark" there anymore and others get divorced because they cant make the other aspects of life work out. When you hear people talk about "soul" mates, this what they are usually refering to...someone who completes all aspects of your life, heart, mind and soul. Very heard to find but soooooo worth the wait.

I think that's really good advice, I wish I'd seen it about 18 year ago. But I wanted to tell you that not all relationships are equal. Some people are not able to work full time while some are. It's not easy to find a balance between both, I believe it can be done though.

Hi Friends! when i choosing my partner am follow my heart and mind suggestions,internally i think what is best for my future i receive sugestions from my mind and i follow the sugesstions. allowing my heart to make life decisions. In a partnership both are working together to make the work successful so i listen my mind and then listen heart.Thanking you Happy my lotting.

Hi,I prefer My Mind.I have something in my mind.If my mind reaches to similar things that only i dooooooooo.......