disciplining 3 year old
By irisann66
@irisann66 (38)
United States
July 23, 2009 7:22pm CST
I've recently been having a hard time disciplining my 3 yr old. She knows she is doing something wrong when she does it & this is VERY frustrating. I scold (even yell @ one point) & put her in a timeout; and she acts like it is amusing. I'm pretty sure she's doing it for attention; but I do give her lots of attention & try to get her to play with her own toys. I stay @ home, & she has 3 other siblings (19, 15, & 7) in the home right now. Sometime it is hard to spread my time out; esp. when the 7 yr old is constantly asking to do an activity or to go somewhere. Whenever I set something up for the 7 yr old to do I obviously include the 3yr old. I haven't had her in preschool yet, have only had her in a couple preschool mini activity classes & since it's the older kids are home more. And there are very few (if none @ all) similar aged children around our neighborhood. So now I'm getting to my wits end because I'm not sure the best way to get her to stop misbehaving (sometimes badly) without going balistic on her. I hate when I lose my temper esp. if it's not a major incident like using a steak knife to cut a piece of fruit. I'd be thankful for any suggestions.
1 person likes this
11 responses
@aravindkrd (610)
• India
24 Jul 09
The main aspect you have to take care os is DIVERT...
Always try and divert the kids focus on something else and handle the correcting part nicely.The yelling part will always make problems worse. So never yell at the kid. The kid should never feel like you are frustrated or you are scolding him or that you are trying to punish. Ofcourse it is never easy always being nice but Trust me this will work some day
1 person likes this
@aravindkrd (610)
• India
24 Jul 09
oh.. sorry for the double post.. It was a mistake when i tried to upload the pic.(Hope mylot will forgive me)
Unlucky that we still don't have an EDIT/DELETE feature...
1 person likes this
@aravindkrd (610)
• India
24 Jul 09
The main aspect you have to take care os is DIVERT...
Always try and divert the kids focus on something else and handle the correcting part nicely.The yelling part will always make problems worse. So never yell at the kid. The kid should never feel like you are frustrated or you are scolding him or that you are trying to punish. Ofcourse it is never easy always being nice but Trust me this will work some day
1 person likes this
@max1950 (2306)
• United States
24 Jul 09
first off lock up the steak knives . if you put them out of reach she;ll most likely get a chair and fall trying to get them. the other kids have had at least 4 years more attention than her ask them to help explain things to her. perhaps you could take her to the park to meet others her age if you have the time or have one of the teens take her for awhile and swing her or put her on the slide . they should be helping you, come on mom get the kids to help im sure your hands are full cooking cleaning,diapers etc,etc,etc. you cant do it all alone, well you could if ya want to spend time in a padded room going cookoo cookoo. good luck.
@irisann66 (38)
• United States
24 Jul 09
You are right - about the steak knives obviously; & having the older kids help more. Actually just recently in the past couple of weeks my 7 yr old has been much better about including & helping to "corral" the 3 yr old's actions. The 7yr old is more understanding about what the 3 yr old is trying to do. I will definitely try your suggestion. Thanks!!
@aseretdd (13730)
• Philippines
24 Jul 09
Tell me about it... my daugther is now three years old... and she could drive me crazy at times... i think she is as stubborn as me and that i have met my match... i don't like shouting at her or punishing her... but those are some of the ways that really work... and now whenever she does something that she knows that is bad... the punishment would be no TV... that works at times... but sometimes it doesn't...
@irisann66 (38)
• United States
24 Jul 09
I will start thinking about the better ways of disciplining her like taking away a thing or activity. Thanks for the comment....
@barehugs (8973)
• Canada
24 Jul 09
It does seem like she is needing attention. Each time you react to her actions by yelling or even disciplining her, she wins. I Helped to raise 4 good boys, I have a few ideas. It doesn't help that she's the baby. I'm not a Great believer in Discipline. Your 3 yr old needs a friend. Since there is no one else you could try to fill the position. Try friendship instead of discipline. Try reading stories from children's books. Soon she will be asking you for a story. The 2 of you will have something to do together, and a friendship will develop.
@irisann66 (38)
• United States
24 Jul 09
Your right about the reading. I am a STRONG believer in reading as much as possible while they are young. I even have my teenagers read to the younger kids. It's good for both of them. I know all my children have a great appreciation for reading & learning. I will try to read to my 3 yr old more during the day & that will probably help I'm sure. Thanks for your input:)
@Sweeten (159)
• United States
24 Jul 09
When i was younger i remember just the fear of being spanked kept me from acting up, and i was a mean little kid, but my parents kept up with the spanking threats and i generally was calmed down by that. It wasnt that they hurt it was just the thought of it that would make me calm down. Try watching Super Nanny or some of those shows because when i watch them every now and then it usually suprises me.
@happyness3 (394)
• United States
24 Jul 09
haha, thats what I do with my kids, when they are misbehaving, I make them watch Nanny 911 or Supernanny! They love them, and then try to be good afterward!
@irisann66 (38)
• United States
24 Jul 09
You know I've never watched that program. But never thought about having her watch it. That might be a good idea once or twice. She might get the idea that what the kids on the program are doing is okay tho - the way she thinks sometimes:) Thanks for the thought.
@cher913 (25782)
• Canada
24 Jul 09
do you have a local library? often they have groups for kids her age. it may be good to get her around other kids. she will soon find out that her attitudes wont be accepted.
also, for time outs, i never sent my kids to their room; i made them sit on the stairs...boring yes, but they had time to think about what they did.
@jbg45638 (88)
• United States
24 Jul 09
You can always try locking in a place she is afraid off. But make sure nothing is in that room that she could hurt herself with. Most likely she will cry but don't let her out. Keep her there till she calms down or cries herself to sleep. She will learn not to repeat that again. Worked on me and my brother before we knew it we stopped misbehaving.
@kprofgames (3091)
• United States
24 Jul 09
I don't know of this will work, but reverse it on her. When she asks something of you, then say no. Tell her you don't listen to me, so why should I listen to you?
Make her think.
Honestly, it's negative attention, but I don't belive in ignoring it and it will go away. I had one boy do that and I just turned it around on him. He wouldn't listen to me about cleaning up something so when he asked to watch a movie with him I said no. Said why should I do something you asked me to do when you do what I don't want you to.
Made him think about it and he changed. Might now work for you and then again it might, but it's worth a try if running out of options.
@happyness3 (394)
• United States
24 Jul 09
Just be careful how you discipline her. I was spanked as a child, and it didn't hurt me any. So there were times when my kids really, really misbehaved and I would give them a little swat on the butt, I think it scared them more than hurt them because I don't think they ever cried. But, anyhow, I was turned into CPS for it. Of course it was unfounded and blah blah blah...but it isn't about the parent disciplining the child anymore, it is about not offending the child. So good luck with this!!
@irisann66 (38)
• United States
24 Jul 09
Yeah, it's a fine line these days. Thanks for the comment:)
@grace118224 (1038)
• China
24 Jul 09
Only with a great patience can you take good care of children . i have seen a lot of cases just like you. Mothers are always yelling and sometimes beating their child . Mothers are always tired and lose temper in the end . Mothers are always sighing why they would give a birth to their child at that time. Children are very cute and naughty which are their nature. Adults should accept this and get on well with them.
