cash effecting a relationship... what about you?
By pbrockington
@pbrockington (500)
United States
July 31, 2009 6:00pm CST
So I now completly understand how money can effect a good relationship. Today I came to work to pick up my check so that me and my guy could see where the bill stood. I recived a check for 389.72. 200.60 dollars had been removed from my check because we had to purchase a second card and i work for the car dealer where we bought the new car for. I had an arragement to only have to pay 160 every payday but management did not agree with that payment so they change it I found out about the change when i opened my check. Now I am not crying about that... Its life. On top of not haveing a whole check in order to release my tags I have to pay MVA 900.00 to start a payment plan. I also am not fussing about that. what i am fussing about is I emotionally am undone. I am drowning in bills to pay my paycheck the boat i thought would at least help me float a little longer has a huge whole in it and I am sinking fast. My guy is not good with figuaring stuff out so the weight is on me. I just want to die but when i get home tonight I will have to be mom, lover, cook, and socially happy for the guest. Has money ever effected how you feel in your relaionship? If so how did you get past the hard time to a better day?
2 people like this
11 responses
@pbrockington (500)
• United States
4 Aug 09
I bought a used car thinking I would have a mean to get to work. i did not understand that i would be making matter worst. i mean the car i got is not that bad if i had more cash coming in.
1 person likes this
@munhozmib (3836)
• Sao Paulo, Brazil
1 Aug 09
Hello there.
I am sorry to hear about your situation. Unfortunately, life is never like we want it to be. Unfortunately, there are many stones in the way.
Money can be a big problem in social relationships. Some people are together just for the money, and some get apart just because they lack the same. We got in a stage of life where money rules over all things. We built this world, slowly, and now money will control our happiness, our emotions, our will to live. If we don't have money, we are nothing. It is sad. I'm glad to know that there are places where money means nothing, and where people can live happily without it.
Money has never played such a big role in a relationship of mine, but yet it might be because I can't even be considered a man (age).
Respectfully,
Munhozmib.
@pbrockington (500)
• United States
4 Aug 09
I belive that life is what we make of it. i belive i can change things... right now i am just not sure what chagnes to make.
@snowy22315 (180870)
• United States
1 Aug 09
Well, sometimes it does. I guess that I wish that my bf was a little bit ambitius so we could have more money, but so far we are getting by. It doesnt really matter to me that much at this point but if things were to get tight I think it would definitely matter to me how much we are taking in.
@grace118224 (1038)
• China
1 Aug 09
i understand what you feel . In some family when the man share less things the woman will do much more to support the family . Yeah she might be very tired . Womem are strong enough i think . They can be as strong as men when they have to face the difficulties alone . Try your best and good luck to you.
@milagrosdavila47 (107)
• United States
1 Aug 09
I can completely relate to what your feeling... all I can say is try to talk with him about how your feeling and see if there is a way that he can help take some of the burden off of you, even if it just helping you around the house or with the kids. Communication is the key and while I don't want to discourage you understand that it won't change overnight. My husband and I have been going through this for about 8 years and there are times that I still feel like this. Also if you haven't done so already try to come up with a budget. I know it's easier said then done especially with kids in the mix but taking it day by day is the only way to survive.
@jazzbabe (166)
• Philippines
1 Aug 09
Hi pbrockington! I'm sorry to hear your dilemma. I think you should talk with your guy about how this problem is affecting you and putting a big weight on you. You are partners and partners work together. Try to calmly talk with your guy, you might be surprised when he somehow know how to figure stuff afterall! Just my two cents..:)
@firemom31 (598)
• United States
1 Aug 09
I can completely understand what you are saying. Some days I am so overwhelmed that I find it hard to function. I to have sole responsibility for the financial outcomes, hubby just can't handle it. The one thing we do that keeps us from letting it affect our marriage is talk. We talk about what things will need to be cut in the budget, what bills are today's prioity, etc. Even though I still have all the responsibility, it helps emotionally just to have him be part of the decisions. To get through one day at a time, I have to focus on the future, if I didn't, I would never make it through days of counting change for gas money. I would not be able to deal with looking at my rusted out old car if I didn't look toward having a better one in the future. I truly believe that if I continue to live my life on a cash basis (no credit cards, no loans), I will eventually overcome this mess. Eyes on the prize...financial stability.
@ravirai8616561 (824)
• India
1 Aug 09
I am of the mindset ,not to say about the others that people are attracted when towards the rich people.I have seen many girls attracted to many boys only bcoz they have money.No one likes the reality and the true heart.
@Ambitiouslyleiah (591)
• United States
1 Aug 09
I understand and it does affect relationships, me and my boyfriend are not on the same page as each other when it comes to who should do what with their money either, that doesn't help. Its basically the only thing we fight about. Its sorta depressing how important money is!
@jorgevmendoza (2)
• Venezuela
1 Aug 09
relationships are about sharing, time, money, fellings and several other things, but sometimes you have to set some limits, you can share a some money of that salary check for the new car, but if you had a previus agreement both of you must respect that. When anyone of the parts of the relationship brakes those limits problems and hard times start to be a big part of the relationship in matters of money
@getpradeep (11)
• India
1 Aug 09
Yeah certainly cash effects relationship even between husband and wife. When financial needs are met properly then the relationships is happy and goes on smoothly but when there is financial constraints it starts to strain even in most loving pair. It seems to me that now a days the only bond between 2 people is not luv or friendship but money. when there is money there is honey also.
