what would you have done if you were me, boyfriend or bestfriend?

Let time decides for it. If you only started it correctly, it might end well. What I mean to say is that if you just said it to your friend about the first approach you've made to the guy, you won't be hurting this much. But since you have made your decision by choosing your friend over this guy. I guess, lets just take time to decide. Who knows the guy cannot also get you out of his mind and find ways to win you back and by that time your friend might have a boyfriend she truly love.

well, I would not say you did very wrong at that moment. You were true in your position,.But when that friend is no more in love or you are also not in touch, you have lost the love. But can't it happen that you contact him again.

You are not clear on the part of your friend.Did she learn your betrayal and left you and that boy?And how did that boy take you when you didn't accept his love?Did he get back to your friend?I think you have lost your friend as yourself has stated.That boy has also done something wrong to develop a love affair with his lover's friend.Both you and the boy are responsible for this.I am man and I will not try on my friend's lover.Cheers!

it is a hard choice actruely,if i were you perhaps i cann't contact both of them.i just want tell you when you are ambivalent and some person arround you can not understand you ,you just follow your inner voice,and be yourself.life is short and make sure everyday is happy in your lift!

Well, it looks to me that u have already lost ur best friend! So where is this choice at the moment? U have only one way to go from what u have written. Of course, u will feel guilty. U knew u had trespassed. If she was around, may be, u could have walked away, and felt u at least had her. No point in thinking about her is there? Having said that, I do need a couple of clarifications here. Did she come to know that u both are seeing each other? Is that the reason she is no longer around? She has possibly made up her mind that the boy is not worth it, and neither are u. U can definitely go ahead with the relationship, if u want with that sort of clearance. However, if ever u do meet that friend, hopefully, it will be on a more mature note. Remember she would have a reason to be annoyed with u. And therefore, she should get a few chances to hit back at u, which u should take it calmly. And if u could adopt a softer stance, I know how u feel, I am sorry, u might be lucky enuf to get her back! Go ahead with the relationship if this is the case. If however, ur friend is not aware of this relationship with her boyfriend, then u do need to discuss it out with her. Honest discussion. She will lash out, accept it. She might even tell others u r bad. U have to meekly accept some ostracising. Try to befriend her after initial tempest. May be everything will be alright. From my personal experience, best friends are such gems, they just dont leave however bad u behave. :-)

i wud never have done wat u did mainly because ... i am a guy.... but still wat u did was unthinkable as far as the laws of friendship goes. i dont know how u can get into a relationship with a guy and not tell ur friend about it. i really anyone wud do wat u did . again maybe u made up dis story and a moral dilemma to get people to respond to u.. well if dats the case congrats!but if dats not, then goin behind ur friends back is the first charge. the second charge wud be to betray ur friend over nothing considering dat u broke up.. i dont really understand why u broke up without even considering the possibility of telling ur friend first. so dats two strikes. and saying u did this all for friendship is a lie. maybe there is something more to the story . and we cant expect u to be honest wit us wen u did not wit ur friend.. so strike three! u are out, baby!

hard call, well my story not quite the same but it got rid of a guy who liked me, and i couldn't stand him. i lost my best school friend in a simular way. i was the ding bat who introduced her to him, she ditched all of us at school for him and nearly missed a few of her hsc exams cause of him. it got him away from me thou, i couldn't stand him and he wouldn't take a hint. but now their married with 3 kids, only became good enough to talk when she was preg with her 2nd child and i was having mine. then she hit below the belt about me being a firm parent and that was it. i will be polite to them now if i see them but that's it. but as for you, was your friend with the guy in question? if not there should have been no reason why you couldn't go out together. but i see the point of not trying to hurt your friend. the guy should have been happy to even just be your friend and you can let things pick up later on instead.

First off I wouldn't have done anything without consulting the friend first. Yeah a few dates is fine but before making a decision about staying with the guy you should of talked to your friend about it and explain to her that sorry it happened but you both enjoy each other and you'd love to continue the relationship but would hate if it would put a strain on your friendship. You don't know what she would of said and it probably wouldn't have been as bad as you think - at probably better than if she found out later on down the line and you hadn't said a thing.

You chose friendship but still lost this friend . I feel a pity on you about this. Well it's hard to say whether you were doing right and wrong . Maybe you should at first be frank to your friend about this boy . It would be hard for you but your friend could make the right judgement on your relationsip with that boy if she is really your friend. Well can you contact this guy again ? Why didn't this guy go directly to your friend to tell her that you two want to be together ?