Does regular criticism affects your psyche?

Certainly not,because I am from Chinese.Our educational system is not a human process.Teacher in school often make some criticisms to student,and Chinese students has the most excellent endurance and patient in the world,on the earth,around the universe I just remember when I was a student on a English lesson in one day before.I had a row with my English teacher,because she said something I can't bear it,which abused my personality.Now I still remember she said like this ,she said I climb out from coffins.At at moment,I was very angry,so I attack her with my mouth too,but I didn't punch her,just use mouth Look!Now a person with our personality are talking to you

Hi Deepak If I get any such remarks I definitely get angry and that time I will not speak a single word to the commenter but later I will prove I am better than that person in every aspects so that the person should feel guilty and should never make such comments against me..

HI DEEPAK!I know what provoked you to start this discussion topic. Here is my answer,--first of all I must describe a bit of my character here--I am very sensitive, reasonably talented and quite efficient, have a King-sized ego, cannot be spontaneously rude even when people are rude to me , would not like to antagonise people and believe in maintaining good relationships with everyone, Now, from here springs my reaction. I would get very irritated and my back would be up [to the skies]when someone does this constantly, and I would alos lose my peace of mind. I would not be able to say anything face to face but I would tend to bottle up feelings and flare up later. It makes me stubborn, and let me behave precisely the way I would . THis being my character, i am trying to find new means of maintaining my peace. I would listen to my husband because by position he is my superior and because a man MUST run his show at home.[it gives me peace to accept this and let peace be at home]If it si others I now have found my way with them , --I interact less or when I have to I try to be courteous but firm with them.Over a period, I have found that people who used to talk like this are wary of me because I have proved myself superior and proved my skills also.Sorry if I sound conceited but this is the response of a person who was criticised unnnecessarily.

Hi Deepak, I am very sensitive person and criticism may hurt me easily. But it varies on situations, if I can find any fault in my side I may feel bad for being a careless person or an irresponsible person but I won’t waste time to ask an apology. If I am sure that there is nothing wrong with me then I won’t mind the criticism. I will try to prove my side, I was completely right. On your comment, “those who make….. smarter than them”, my opinion is they must be having an inferiority complex and criticizing others is way to hide their lack of knowledge. I believe that a person who is having more knowledge or more abilities should be humble to others irrespective of the position/status of the other people.

hello dpk! well, i think somehow it does affect..coz when we keeps on hearing those things everyday...i think we will become irritated with it...hehehe and it will make us think if we really are like that... but hmmmm, since i know myself more than anybody, i think the best thing that i could do is to counter strike them by making my work better...i mean by being more competent in my work...to prove to them that they are wrong with their criticism or just take it positively... maybe you are right that those people are just insecure and threaten...that's why they are doing that to make us paranoid! huh! i hate such kind of people specially in the work place...

Hi Deepak, it is very sad when such things are said with no real love behind them, it can be very hurtful, especially if the person's confidence level is already abit low. Can be gutting remarks! You are always committing mistakes, you are careless, you are good for nothing.....these are just terrible things to say. These things will not inspire a person to do better but make him feel really insecure and dejected. These remarks are indeed very insensitive and I would strongly rebuke the person saying them, it definitely shows that the person saying them is mentally deranged to be uttering such words. Perhaps this is how they have been brought up and just passing it on, but whatever it maybe these words are very damaging and should not be taken to the heart. Understand that the person uttering them is 'sick'. There is a healthy way to criticize and these people should learn about these ways if they truely care to get better results, otherwise it is just a form of condescension to make them feel superior. I hope you have not been a victim of these words, if you have ignore the harshness in them. I am sure you do much more than you are getting credit for. Remember one thing you are only answerable to yourself (or God if you believe in God)....look inside your own heart and see the truth of the situation, try to improve where you can but also give your credit for all the good things you do do!

I hate negative remarks. I have had to deal with those in my childhood alot. I have even had to deal with it in my adult years also. People do not understand how bad it does affect some people and their thoiughts about themselves afterwards.

Those that are constantly picking on others are themselves aware and ashamed of their insecurities, or faults, or things they just aren't as good at as others. It's sad that others must pick on someone just to make themselves feel better. I suppose this isn't always the way things are, but for the most part I think that it is.

Hi, yes i think it does. For me people who make this criticisms to their co workers are people who have insecurities. They take on other people what they themselves lack in their ability and character. They do this to make themselves look good and in a way make up for their lack of confidence. But that is just what i think, because i have this co-worker who does this and i know that it is he who does not have the abilities to do such tasks.

..well, if I'm not grown up, I would definitely be affected.. I would feel bad and immediately give up.. however, with so much experiences I had in the past, I would take those comments positively.. In a way, it well help become stronger and more careful in doing the task.. I would also ask the person who is telling me those things to tell me what I did wrong.. Yeah, I believe that those people who are doing this only wanted to be recognized as more superior and smarter than me.. But that doesn't matter already.. I know what I can do and I do what I believe is right.. Anyway, I know I can never please everybody.. There will always be somebody who will be giving negative comments to me.. This is life and it the reality.. For me, we just live and act according to what and how we believe.. We don't live for others, we live for ourselves.. Whatever accomplishment we have will be our happiness not them.. It is then necessary that we prove those people who are belittling us that they are definitely wrong..

Constant criticism can certainly have a negative impact on your psyche. I grew up in a very emotionally distant environment and the only attention I received consisted of criticism. It was quite a serious situation and I did not become aware until I grew into adulthood that my up bringing was downright abusive. I don’t know if I am particularly sensitive to disapproval but I feel that any sign of criticism still affects me quite deeply even it is from someone who feels quite unsecure his or herself and receives gratification from putting others down.

Hello deepak! Sometimes, I do got affected with those negative remarks by the people surrounds me. Although I tried to ignore it, deep inside me, there's still a little bit of hurt feelings. But whatever happens, "life goes on".

Hello my friend dpk262006 Ji, Such remarks should find welcome at initial stages and not at regular basis. It is good untill some one is not pointed out, improvement in performance may noty be noticeable. But in case it is a habit of someone pointying out at others, it should always be discouraged. Such characters are not satisfied from their home side. They have something to say at their home and they react in offices. I would not tolerate it. MaY god bless You and have a great time.

I won't be an idiot to an idiot. He/she can attack me verbally and I'll retort back with words that's enough to shut him/her up. I think careless is not hurting enough but 'you are good for nothing’? How good is he/she? I will make that particular person eat his/her word soon after that. Abusive words are a form of bullying, never tolerate and let them do their way.

If I were to go through a constant criticism as the type that you have mentioned, it would affect my psyche to some extent. It would cause an inferiority complex to some extent.But here again it would depend on the phse of life Deepak. If this happens today, i would say that i can get a hold on myself introspect and try and sort it out. At a much earlier stage this would have definitely created a problem. In fact i know of a young boy going exactly though something like this and is now into depression.

Of course it can affects me somehow. I might believe I am really like that in other words I am useless, but on the other hand who is this person to talk to me that way. If I regularly hear those words, of course I will not just listen, I act or respond. If they believe I am like that, I try my best to change my attitude. I change for the better. I let them see that I can be a better person. But the best thng would be is to not let those criticism affects you. Don't let other people put you down, although you have shortcomings be sure to take it back.

It will tend to affect me slightly at that point of time.. BUt i will let it go immediately too.. haha =D For, it's human nature not to like anything bad or critism.. THus, it's normal for us to feel affected upon hearing that.. hehe ^_^ What we need to do is to get out of it fast, and improve on ourself, to prove them wrong.. haha =D PLus, be it proving it to them, or ourself, it will only do us good, for we are improving to be an efficient worker.. haha =D

Hi dpk! That is so true! People that make these remarks usually don't really care what they are doing to the people who the are making the remarks about or how it is going to affect them! If you want someone to do things better I feel that criticizing them in a negative way only makes things worse! Belittling them just breaks down their spirit! I had many bosses do this to me! They would degrade me and it would make me feel horrible! I would end up hating them and the job and wanting to leave. If someone is really interested in helping you do better then I believe using positive reinforcement is the right way to acheive this outcome. People don't ever react well to negative criticism. At least I know that I didn't!

Hello Deepak sir, Hope you are doing well! I believe that in some stage, criticism helps us to improve ourselves in some areas where we are not good.But it depends upon the criticism(whether it is constructive or destructive).If i was criticized like a Criminal for my small mistakes, then i would loose my temper soon and turn on against them(now i reduced this habit much). I had even resigned 2 jobs never caring about my salary. In those 2 incidents, one time I resigned my job on 30th of the month, where 1st is my salary. Thus the height of my reaction towards too much criticism on me for small things. I read somewhere.. The good form of criticism is known as constructive criticism. a constructive criticism can lend much needed assistance to an individual by giving them feedback on things that can be improved and issues that can be avoided. And I remember one more thought, "when someone is criticizing you, be happy that someone is listening to you" So, I still think the way that there are lot of positive facts hidden with others criticism towards us. But one thing for sure. I would never allow anybody to criticize me who are not good human beings or the one who is not perfect in his duties. And at the same time, I will try to be quiet and remain calm when elder peoples or the persons who helped my family, then persons who helped me in my hard times, etc., if these peoples criticize me, I always try to hear them or atleast not to show my angry towards them. In my life, I had never debated with an old peoples even if they gave wrong statements. Respecting their age, I always maintain silence, the best thing to do. Other than this, I would never fear to give back words to the people whoever criticize me wrongly. I will never care who they are or in which positions they are. If i found their criticizing towards me is wrong, then i will start with my word saying "No,you are wrong" My mother, My Aunt and even Grandma had scold me to change this habit. But i couldn't change till now, as i don't find any wrong thing in saying "No, I am not", when one wrongly criticize me "you are wrong" Criticism is good so long as its not targeting any body and anything in specific. Criticism - a checkpoint of our actions and work. Happy Postings.. Have a nice time! Nice Discussion!

Hello Deepak, Yes. There is a saying that if ten people agree and say you would be termed a thief. Likewise negative remarks all the while works like slow poisoning and a time would arrive when the person at target would seriously starts de valuating himself and there could be the final catastrophe. We, the so called educated people know this is not good to pressurize any one with negative node and it could affect the person's phychological balance and his mental aptitude might go down,hardly realize and are ever overlooking this. Constant belittling is more dangerous for the growing children as they are still not sure about a hell lot of things. They should rather be patted with encouraging words. Those who pass such remarks are surely conceited and feel they are the better off.