Telling Them The Truth...

I'm with you. As parents we try to teach our kids not to lie and yet I see so many parents out and out lying to their kids about all sorts of things. I imagine they will regret this later on as the child grows and they wonder why the kid just won't listen to them. I've never had a problem talking to my kids about much of anything.

It's right to tell the child the truth as long as it's appropriate for their age as whatever answers they get, these remain in their minds. It's not proper giving them wrong info as they would relay the same to others when they get the chance to. It would be a pity for the child relaying or saying wrong infos.

Im like you and I have gotten the look that I was a bad parent because I told them the truth. I dont go into anything gory but when asked I answer truthfully and depending on the age will be how I explain the answer. I honestly think Im doing right by being truthful. If a child asks it must be on their mind and something they want to know or even need to know. Why lie, later on the child is going to figure out the truth and know that you lied!

Like you, I believe that children need truthful answers. I would temper the answer according to the child's age and the exact question asked. Some one a simple answer...not the entire story behind a single question. I do not invent or embellish or add gory details just for effect. If a parent, any parent, asked me to lie should their child ask a particular question, no, I would NOT do that. I would have to tell the child that they must take that up with the parent. Good topic, by the way! Karen

I work in a daycare and I often my two nieces stay with me on weekends. I completely agree with you that you should tell children the truth but as far as they need to know. I have seen children in the daycare setting that know too much. It gives them nightmares and it really screws with their head when they know all the gory and inappropriate details of something. This is also true of movies that they may watch at home that can be disturbing for a 6 year old child. All I have to say is be careful he can always tell your child more of the truth when they get a bit older. Once a child is 8 years old they are more likely to keep their behavior from that age for the rest of their lives. The early years are so important.

I ALWAYS tell my kids the truth, even if it is uncomfortable for me to talk about. I dont want them thinking that I lied about certain subjects in life because they were "bad". I dont go into gorey details and sometimes I might just not say all that would need to be said if explaining the same things to an adult, but I never lie and tell them babies come from flowers and are spread by bees or any other wild stories like that. I definately dont want them to lie to me about these subjects when they get older, so I tell them the truth(to a point) and then let them know my expectations for them on the subject matter and leave it at that. My 7 year old daughter knows that I had her before I was married, but that I would very much like for her to wait until after college and marriage to have her babies so that she can give them everything in the world and life will be easier to a point for her. I dont tell her "no kids til your 40" or anything like that. I also explain to my children that if they make a mistake or do something wrong, that lieing to me is a worse crime than the actual crime itself, and for that reason, they dont lie, I let them know how important it is for them to be honest with me and truthful and that I will do the same. This way, I hope if they are ever in real trouble, they wont be afraid to come to me. I dont know if this will work, but at least I put the time into thinking about what I could do to improve my relationships with them, if it fails, at least I know I tried.

hey there twoey,yes i have always believed in telling my son the truth except for most things,but i cant and wont say all,like the big man on xmas,the bunny,and the fairy,hes 7 now and what sucks is that i always told myself id never lie liek my parents did abotu it all,but in the end the magic won..and i just didnt want him to be the only kid that knew,anywho but other things i am straight up as possible to him,hes very smart and very intelligent for his age and he understands things most kids dont his age.,i think it has alot to do with how sick i get and my disablement,and the fact its just him and i,and alot of all the bad bad bad things thats happened to him over the years, and teh last question u asked was so tough for me,if a friend asked me to lie to there child..i dont think i would,i would just simply say u need to ask yoru parents hun..i cant answer that for you..plain and simple:) have a good one! April

I always told my son the "age appropriate truth"; with 3 exceptions - Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy. When a child is ready to give up these beliefs they will and I will not take that innocent belief away from them before they are ready to give it up.

You could mess up your childs head if you told the child gory stuff. Its best to tell the child the truth. Tell the truth in a simple way which will make the child understand. The simple reason is that when the child grow up he/she will realise that parents were lying. He/she would assume that there is no harm in lying. Some people find it easier to tell lies rather than using their heads and telling the truth in a proper way. I don't like to lie and hardly lie.

I see many parents around to be impatient to answer their kids' questions . I don't know whether i can be patient enough to reply to my kid's curiosity when he grows up and starts to ask why . Many parents ignore these questions and sometimes give no serious answers as i know. I have two nieces and they ask questions all the time . I think adults should firstly try their best to answer every question the kids ask . Tell them truth or not ? It's hard to handle. Just go between with skillful i think .