Do you really think love has no age limit?
By magic9
@magic9 (980)
China
August 29, 2009 9:06am CST
Love is sweet and bitter, sweet bitter......
I'm not sure if this is love or dare I call it love, but it's sort of sweet and bitter. A young boy who is 14 years younger than me suddenly ran into my life. Though we jokingly call each other "honey" sometimes and we both enjoy staying hours together (at least I myself think so ), I am not confused whether I should call it love because the age distance is so far ---- 14 years' span ! we are tutor and student. He's leaving in a few days. of course I definitely know nothing will happen and we both would have nothing happen between us, still I can't help holding my emotion.
I know this is ridiculous, only have I read or seen this on novels or movies which are untrue. But I have never imagined such thing will happen to me. I admit I have a crash on him. Knowing he's going out with a girl makes me uncomfortable. I refuse to have a taste of the chips the girl bought him as breakfast. After one-day seperation, we both feel lack of something. Maybe this is because we are used to staying together to do some exercises for his exams. Receiving his text message, I would be very unwilling to erase it, rather keep it in my cellphone; yeah, I confess that his calls or text messages will excite me. I'm at a loss right now. Maybe this is because I've been single for too long.
Adulthood and values have taught me that love can't always be promised in terms of marriage though I hunger for it. I don't know, I just want to write randomly here about how I am feeling right now. hope to read your comment on this---- is this love? or is love really boundless? free from age limit? I wish I were a teen as he is !
1 person likes this
21 responses
@staraevp (81)
• Kenya
30 Aug 09
Hi Magic, love is like measles (a disease) it is dangerous when measles affect you at an older age. i presume you have for a long time in your life not had a chance to find someone who listens and spend time with you as this young male man does. Personally i dont see any problem though as long as you are comfortable its ok. I was also involved with a female who was 10 years younger being a man i did not see any problem unlike the other way round.
As long as the relationship is fullfilling the void in your heart its cool. Try being very serious with him and even attempt asking him to leave the young girl for you and see how he reacts. This will give you a chance to understand the level at which he values you. If he's serious about you he will famble and try to find ways to please you, if not he will call it quits for the young teanage friend.
This is my personal opinion based on my life experience you do not need to subscribe for it.
1 person likes this
@magic9 (980)
• China
2 Sep 09
hi, staraevp. actually we haven't started our relationship and neither of us will do . we all know that clearly unless we are abroad, and both feel lonely and can be dependent on each other, then there may very likely be a romantic story ensures. thank you. have a good day!
@rosdimy (3926)
• Malaysia
29 Aug 09
Love has no age boundary. There is nothing wrong for a woman to fall in live with a man much younger than she is. Usually other circumstances, normally the reaction of close friends and relatives, cause the dream to become out of reach.
Cases like yours are not that rare. One of my former student married a woman ten years older than he is. They are still happily married. There were certain issues like the fact that he looked like her son. He grew a beard to counter this. Muhammad's first wife was a widow, 15 years older than him (please concentrate on the age difference, not the religion). A man in Sumatra, Indonesia, married a woman old enough to be his grandmother.
The important point is on how you feel about the whole situation. Can both of you accept the age difference, and other factors related to growing old? For example when you are 55 he would be 40. If you think you can overcome the obstacles, then follow your heart.
1 person likes this
@magic9 (980)
• China
29 Aug 09
hi, thank you, really.
My affection towards him hasn't reached that deep, so is his. Marriage or a serious relationship is just myth, I must say. I believe his parents would kill me if they know it.
He would not think that way, I mean he surely has a good impression on me, it's only that much, I guess. nothing more,
I don't feel guilty, nothing happens, I'm here, just write down my feelings, and I'm so glad all of you are so kind to respond, gee! how I wish the successful cases would happen to me !
thanks.
@mrbranan (1012)
• United States
29 Aug 09
I'm not sure how old this boy is. There is a big difference between someone who is 14 seeing someone who is 28 and someone 28 seeing someone who is 42. If they are both adults it is alright. However if one of them is a child then yea there is a problem.
@taterkitty (45)
• United States
30 Aug 09
I personally feel that as long as you're both above the legal age of consent then there is no age limit. My husband was 19 and I was 24 when we met. We've been together for 10 1/2yrs now and we just celebrated our 5th wedding anniversary. Love is blind to age as long as you have things in common and make each other happy.
1 person likes this
@iowamomof3 (30)
• United States
29 Aug 09
I truly don't feel there is an age boundary when it comes to love. i do feel though that the ages you are when you meet might have a factor on things. If he is 18 or 19 and you are in your early 30's that might been that he would think twice because you are old enought to drink legally, get into bars, and at that age you are wanting marriage and possibly kids. Him, not so much. But if he is 22 or 23 then things could be totally different. I met my husband when he was 23 and I was 33. I had been married and had 2 kids. he had never been married and was still in the partying stage. neither of us planned on looking for a serious relationship but it happened. i had not problem being 10 years older than him, I felt flattered but yet I was very open and honest with him too. he knew that I didn't know if I wanted any more kids, he knew that I was hoping to find someone and get married within the next 5 years. Once he knew all of these things and we still continued to get closer I knew that things might actually work. We have a different taste in music, he has no clue sometimes in things I am talking about because they were before his time but it doesn't bother either of us. To be honest we kid about the fact that when I was 16 and partying at night getting drunk in high school he was a kindergartner still pottying his pants!!! you have to make light of it. A woman knows when she is getting a feeling from a guy and if you think you are getting a feeling from him then see where it goes but..... you didn't state if he is still in high school or out. That is a fine line there so watch out.
@agv0419 (3022)
• Philippines
30 Aug 09
I think age doesn't matter when it comes to love I think you can't control your emotions sometimes. It is comes unexpectedly so I think you need to know if the guy have a feelings for you. If the guy can't love back I think you are not meant for each other. Wait if your love for each would grow or not. Sometimes age gap is the issue in a couple because you need to adjust on the attitude of each other. He's in the right age so it is not a big issue anymore.
1 person likes this
@magic9 (980)
• China
29 Aug 09
hi, thank god! your reply is really a much need comfort for me right now.
yeah, you are right, a woman knows very well about her feeling, it's just I don't want to admit coz I'm afraid to get hurt.
But one thing is quite certain. he's only 18, a would-be college student studying abroad. He's extremely handsome, from a very wealthy family, which would make even young gorgous retreat. I know that. And I know it's 100% impossible between us. I am one of his tutors right now and I can feel that he likes to spend leisure time with me than the rest mentors. He orders take-out for both of us, talk with me and yell"honey" when I'm answering a phone call esp. from a man.
I should say lucky you, mam ! really, you are so lucky and thoughtful. Due to cultural difference, it is possible for people outside China, but in China, a very conservative, it's just like a guilt ! you know.
It's so painful to face someone that you have a feeling for but have to hold back your emotion.
He's returning back to US in 3 days. I know after his departure, I would feel so empty and no motivation to work coz there's so much memory in there.
@i_money (25)
• India
30 Aug 09
hi magic9. well in a normal case i would say that there is no age limit i mean we read everyday in papers that ppl with a lot of age difference get married and u can fall in love with anyone anytime its not something u can control....
but in ur case the guy u like is just 18 right and as u said i don`t see no future in u two so its better that u remain strong and try not to express ur fellings as they may even have a deppressing effect on both of u think about it and reply me
i would be happy to know if i were of any help
@23uday (2997)
• India
30 Aug 09
Hi friend,
Love is no age limit.Its a really a great relationaship between two hearts and
such a relationship never breaks in life and leaves forever and ever.
L-long life
O-ocean of tears
V-valuable life
E-emotional feelings.
have a great day.
@becdmd (704)
• Philippines
30 Aug 09
I think love has no age limit but of course we get to think twice if we want to go for it...if we continue being in love with the person or not...Only you could tell if that is love or just an infatuation...you could only be longing for a relationship for a long time and that's why you find it in the company of that young boy and feel the connection. It's a good release that you just vent out your emotions here. Just continue your friendship with the boy, maybe you're really meant for each other.
@Archie0 (5652)
•
30 Aug 09
Well there is a limit for everything as per my view, but when it comes to love they say love has no barriers or limits but still i think even love has some limits somewhere because you cannot marry a 70 year, or you cannot marry your brother or sister.For me atleast i think there is a limit for even love.
@sujuwonder (212)
• Philippines
30 Aug 09
Love knows no limits. It is man that made standards on who to love. My father is 14 years older than my mother but their love is amazing. Even my husband and I have 8 years gap (my husband is older).I dont think anything is wrong as long as both are single and happy then its fine. Its nice to be in love. It actually makes you feel younger. Maybe we become hesitant when others raise their eyebrows and begin telling us how awkward the relationship could get. But at the end of the day, it would still be us who would decide. As long as its right and you both are happy, then go for it.
@colydf (913)
• China
30 Aug 09
Although people sometimes say that love has no age limit, as far as I am concerned, love with an age span of one to six years is OK, and for myself, I do not think it is wise to get married with a person who has an age span of more than ten years. Because you will think differently and bring a lot of conflicts. Have a nice day!
@grace118224 (1038)
• China
30 Aug 09
I'm not sure about it but as you decribed above i do think you've fallen in love with him now . But i don't know how this feeling would last for . Doea love has no age limit ? I'm not sure yet . But there's case that a girl from our university aged 28 married a famous professor aged 82 from America (He is a American-Chinese)a few years ago . Now they still feel happy so it's really hard to know. It depends, i think.
@Spawnfan2288 (2)
• United States
30 Aug 09
It sounds like love to me and no I do not believe that love has an age limit. I think you should pursue it if you really want to. :)
@Bloggership (1104)
• Indonesia
29 Aug 09
Love does blind sometimes... So what can i say here... Yea, perhaps you were just too long for being single i guess... But i think love does had no limitations in ages too... I can't say is not right for you get a very close relationship with the boy but, if both of you were going too far like kissing and more, i could impacting a negative influence for the boy in a future maybe...
@trisha27 (3494)
• United States
29 Aug 09
Hmm ok, well I think as long as its legal that love has no age limits. It shouldn't have any age limits. Actually I am married to a man who is 22 years older than I. And we are very much in love although of our age difference. I think in your case though that you may just be crushing and that it may not be love. And I say this because after reading the end of your discussion that he was still a teenager. In teenager is it that he is under the age of 18 or that he was 18 or 19. That's what I am wondering. If he was of legal age then I would say maybe give it a shot, but I just truely think that you are crushing and that it will eventually go away the feeling that you are having for him. Then I was thinking that if he is under the legal age limit then there is really no thought in not trying to pursue it. Allthough I am not sure were you are located at and what the age limit is there. Here it is 18. Then I look at the factor that you said that he has a girlfriend. The question is though, is he feeling the same way about you. Then like I said he has a girlfriend. So you have to think about that as well.
@bluehibiscus (702)
• United States
29 Aug 09
It does depend on the age of the people, I agree children should not see adults. But Alok is 10 years older than me, he is the love of my life I would do anything for him. he is older and at the moment more educated but we can talk about news, politics, history, we have so many interests. I love him.
@rudynahcapone (50)
• United States
29 Aug 09
Age is not a question when you TRULY love a person. Genuine love has no age limit. Love comes along when you don't anticipate it but it's always a case to case basis, you know. You have to use your mind, too, when you want a long-term relationship with someone.
@lakerfanster (2577)
•
30 Aug 09
I think teenagers are getting more and more mature at younger ages than ever before and obviously one of the reactions of that is that teenagers are actually more commonly in love younger than before. Of course there were teenagers who were actually in love decades ago, that has always happened but teenagers seem to be maturing earlier now more than ever.
