Still be friends after sleeping together

I don't understand the situation. You mean, you were sleeping for that long but no commitment at all? Anyway, you can be friends, but not now that you still have the pain (do you?). Sooner maybe you can be. Since he started to be interested in someone and u too, what's the point of seeing each other still? When you feel that you are no longer attached with him and he the same way, then i think that time you can start to built a new friendship not based from your past but a new one.^^;

NO miss, sleeping with someone doesn't make you a good friend.If he is dating someone mean that he likes someone else already or doing double crossing.Please don't do this again from my advice. Best regards,

absolutely...I see no reason NOT to be UNLESS it was a violent relationship....I've remained friends with pretty much most of my ex's whether they were weekend flings, friends with benefits or long term relationships....the way I see it is, we were friends BEFORE being intimate..why not remain being friends after..no reason to cut a friendship off just becuase intimately it didnt work out...

no way , if some one doesnt care for my emotions he should be out of my life , i dont want such a friend in my life

No sweetheart...i can never be a friend with someone anymore after i had slept with him. I know exactly how it feels and all i can tell u is there is no future in him. Do not be friends with him while u are committed to someone else...will only create to a bigger problems. Try to forget him and carry on with ur life. Look for a better future ahead of u. If u've been on and off for four years then there is no way for a lasting and honest relationship...i dont see any future in there baby. Look for a brighter future. Good luck and More power!

I believe you could, but it depends on how much feeling you really have for him and if you're going to ever expect something more from him. You can't be jealous of him and visa/versa if you or he finds another someone...because you're friends. Try it and see what happens..if it doesn't work out, then you know you can't be friends without having intimate feelings for him. Good luck.

I did the same thing for about 6 years and he finally met this girl and they started a family. I was really attached to him but after a while I just had to let him go. I wouldn't say we are friends but I still speak to him like I used to when we see each other out.

Personally, I think that you could still. I just hope that you WILL STOP sleeping together when you become friends again. I can feel that definitely one of you will suffer and it is mostly likely you will be on the losing end.

hi hippie, that was so cool for both of you and that is so good that up to now you are very good with each other knowingly well that both of you are courting another one.. for me, i can't stand doing that to someone whom not my boyfriend or something.. i just can't do it.!! good luck for the both of you.. janebeth.

I think its difficult to be like a friend with whom we have slept but it depends hoe you take it.Some people take sleeping with a person just as a physical relaxation or fun but for some others its an emotional attachment that can never be erased.If you take it to be some sort of activity rather than an emotional attachment then you can be friendly with him like before but if you take it as an emotional aspect then it would be difficult for you to be with him like before.SO its in your hands..

Well,I can only say that sometimes,things may become different as what we expected,and it is what we call "life".So don;t take it too serious,Let it be! What should belong to us,we could finally take it;but what do not belong to us,we can not ask or force to get it.

hello there my friend. It depends on your action. If you still want to be friend with that guy you used to sleep with well, why not. But if you are hurt and in pain whenever you are with him. Well I don't see any good reason for you to make friends with him again. Right. It's just in your emotions. Escape from painful stimuli and go to where you can be happy.

Well, I - as a man - would have no problems with it as far as we both knew what was actually happening. If you felt was worthy beginning a relationship that was the time, but as you didn't think it was, it's gone. You're now dating someone else. Keeping that up, it will become "cheating" and that's one of the things I'm mostly against. I believe you should decide whether going to bed with him or dating someone else is the most worthy. I personally believe that someone for good - a girlfriend, a wife - would be the best option.

may be, and may be not.. hard to decide now..

Hippie_Ashley, First of all, I feel that you should start pondering what the terms "Friendship" and "Relationship" actually means to you. Confuse these concepts and I can assure you that you will have endless problems with or be in a successful committed relationship. This discrepancy in reality will force you to become miserable, almost like me dangling a cheese burger in front of your eyes, while you being consumed by an innate hunger. It is just simply consequential for your partner and eventually you (especially). One very important concept is to be constantly 'aware' of your thoughts and emotions, instead of relying on your subconscious to provide grounds for your feelings and let them gain overall control over logic. The problem with most people is that they often decide that 'we will still remain as friends' but they would unconsciously behave and think that their position are worth than just that of a friend. It's impossible for a downgrade to occur (from a relationship to a friendship), with all other factors remaining the same. Even the most amicable breakup will probably experience some sort of subtle shift in adjustment, as well as perceived rights and position. Your choice of action must be in sync with the understanding of yourself - if you know that you belong to the category of people that just cannot remain as friends, then constantly putting yourself in situation, in which you KNOW you can't handle will only result in greater paroxysm of pain. Seriously, it's more than just a change in thinking - it actually involves your own personal values and beliefs, which is something that might not be as readily subjected to changes. So, in my own observation and opinion, the most effective way to get along with life is to sever all means of contacts with this person. Not for a while, but as long as it takes you to overcome the urge to return to be in bed with him when things do not work out for you. Take care of yourself and you certainly deserve the best.

If we're both on the same page, ie it's over for both of us, maybe yes. Otherwise no! I see you found your way here. Welcome!!!

No I couldn't. It would hurt too much every time I seen him that I had that type of relationship with him for 4 years and now someone else is.