Do you ever get jealous of a friend's success?
By giada7raine
@giada7raine (103)
Philippines
September 5, 2009 4:09am CST
Whenever you see a friend living the life that you want or becoming successful in his/her life, do you ever feel envious? Sometimes we have goals in life that are hard to achieve but it seems to be easy for your friends to get those things that you want. How do you feel about that? If you ever feel jealous of your friend, what do you do?
4 people like this
39 responses
@marctiu (829)
• Philippines
6 Sep 09
I don't get envy with a friend's success. I'll feel happy for them. I would rather feel happy for them than to envy them because if you get jealous of their success the more you loose your dream.
I think it is best that you strive to achieve your own dream and that you may share it with your friends soon when you have fulfilled that dream. I know that this depends in many situations. But for me. Let it be. It is their fate to be rich and maybe it is not part of me to be rich. Maybe it has been all planned out.
@giada7raine (103)
• Philippines
6 Sep 09
I think successes are more fulfilling when shared with other people. When friends are successful, they should share it with other friends. So, if we get successful we should also share our success with our friends. Thanks marctiu for your response.
@authorofthree (1)
• United States
4 Oct 09
What if that friend was given the opportunity to help you acquire success but chose to let their jeolousy stand in the way of even giving you advice when asked. This happened to me. I asked several friends for suggestions, comments re questions I asked. ALL, and I mean ALL, the friends that I thought were friends acted in silence until they ignored me. Stop callling, never asked about my progress, never asked about the books, nothing.
@iskayz (5420)
• Philippines
5 Sep 09
Well , truthfully, yes, I do get envious at times. But not to the point that it will destroy our friendship or turn myself into a bad person.
Envy or jealousy is a natural emotion. Everybody feels it sometimes because of certain situations. But with this kind of situation, I always say to myself, if others can do it, so can I. I just look at others' success as a challenge for me. And of course, I do feel happy for my friend's success.
Ciao!
@giada7raine (103)
• Philippines
6 Sep 09
I think there are really people that makes us feel jealous but maybe we turn the experience into something positive, like looking at the reason for the jealousy. Maybe your friend has accomplished something great and you can study how he/she did that and then maybe you can also apply it in your own life.
@ShirleyBillingsley (1544)
• United States
6 Sep 09
No, i don't get jealous of a friend's success. That happened to me one time, with a friend of mine.. or so, who i thought was a friend. They didn't seem to like it because i was doing better. Since that time, i learned from them, to be happy for the next person, and not to have anger or jealousy towards anyone.
@chenxiaoyue_713 (2165)
• China
6 Sep 09
I think it normal for people to feel jealous of others' success because we are all born selfish. When we see other people's accomplishments, we have a strong desire to regard them as our own, espeically when we ourselves are not as successful as those achiving great sucess.
Life never turns out the way we expected. Sometimes, it's harder for a person to succeed even if he/she makes great effort; to others however, it seems quite easy. Perhaps the God does not treat each one equally. I belong to the former case. No matter how hard I tried, I still couldn't surpass one of my friends. Everything seems to be in her favour while in my way. It caused great bitterness in my heart. But now I've learned to control my emotion. After all, it's not a good way to feel jealous of others.
@giada7raine (103)
• Philippines
6 Sep 09
chenxiaoyue_713, I think we shouldn't try to surpass our friends. We all have goals in our lives and these are different for each one of us. What another person may consider as success may not be what we want. But when jealousy is present we try to achieve things that aren't really our goals, we do these things so we can surpass others. I hope you can let go of bitterness because it's not healthy and it won't help you in achieving your dreams in life. Thanks for sharing!
@dozhou (326)
• United States
6 Sep 09
I am jealous of others' success, even my friends. I am sorry, I can not control this feeling. Sometimes, all of a sudden, a lot of things come together, disapointment, depression, jealous.. especially, when you originally thought he or she is not as good as you.
@giada7raine (103)
• Philippines
6 Sep 09
Thanks for sharing this, dozhou. That's the whole point of this discussion. This topic is inevitable. But I hope that you find it in your heart to control your jealousy. Instead of focusing on that feeling, why not think of how you can ge out of your situation so you can leave those feelings behind? I wish you luck!
@felicityjiang (104)
• China
6 Sep 09
My answer is yes. I will feel jealous. Of course I am happy for their success. But sometimes, I feel very jealous of their success. Because I think I am also an excellent person. I will found out why I don't get those things that I want and why I cannot be successful or more successful than them. Then I will regulate myself and strive harder for my goals. Maybe someone is so lucky that they can get what they want quickly. If I have not the luck like them, what I can do is just to work harder and prepar for the chances.
@giada7raine (103)
• Philippines
6 Sep 09
You're right, felicityjiang. People don't get successful at the same time. We all have our time! Your friend might have first experienced success and later on you will too. Hard work will really help us achieve our goals in life. The road to these goals become less difficult when your friends help you along the way.
@horsesrule (1957)
• United States
5 Sep 09
I have felt jealous of a friend's success before. I think it is normal to feel some jealousy but we must not let it eat us up inside. I would never tell my friend or be mean to them just because I was a little jealous, that would be childish. Plus it would be sort of crazy. But I really do believe that it is normal and okay to feel a little jealousy when good things happen to other because after all, we want to have good things happen to us too.
@giada7raine (103)
• Philippines
5 Sep 09
I feel the same way. I think it's normal for people to feel jealous, but we shouldn't let it get in the way of our friendships. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
@dolce_vita78 (8062)
• Philippines
7 Jan 12
Hi giada7raine!
I would never be jealous of a friend's success. I would definitely be happy for the successes of my friends. Perhaps, think whether the same would ever happen to me or not. Or, think why such can't be achieved by me. But to the extent of actually getting jealous? No way!
Friends are supposed to support you through good times and bad--but if your friend is jealous, she might be booing when you're happy and cheering when times are rough. Coping with jealous friends isn't easy.
@chrislotz (8137)
• Canada
17 Jan 10
I might feel some jealousy but I don't act on it and I am glad for them. My baby sister is one of those people. I mean, I am glad for her that she has a wonderful life and has lots of money and travels a lot and never has had to worry about a thing in life. She has the golden touch in money and in love and in excitement.
I feel some jealousy and wish I had some of what she has, but I don't do it in an envious way. I am glad for her and just wish I had some of her golden touch. Funny, the name of her hairdressing shop is called The Golden Comb. I never put the two together before, her golden luck and the name of her shop. lol
@vicky30 (4766)
• India
2 Nov 09
I never get jealous of a friends success
.I know he has done his hard work to reach that position.There are some times a friend might get jealous of us when we get success but it all depends on a persons way of thinking.Our thoughts say that things are easy for the person to earn but everyone goes through problems to come up in life.
.I know he has done his hard work to reach that position.There are some times a friend might get jealous of us when we get success but it all depends on a persons way of thinking.Our thoughts say that things are easy for the person to earn but everyone goes through problems to come up in life.
@hotsummer (13837)
• Philippines
5 Sep 09
my honest answer is yes. it will hurt my ego and make feel so sad if the other person or someone close to me will keep getting successful and i feel left out specially if the friend will not share his or her success and will just keep the success to him or her self. but if the friend is generous enough to share to success with me i may not feel that jealous.
@giada7raine (103)
• Philippines
6 Sep 09
You're right, hotsummer, you may feel left out. I experienced that before. But what about friends who really show off their accomplishments when they know that you are struggling to be successful?
@giada7raine (103)
• Philippines
5 Sep 09
You're right, friends should help each other achieve their dreams rather than pull each other down...
@allsheikhly (83)
• China
5 Sep 09
i admit i did it before,he is my best friend,when we are in high school we locate in a same level.but now ,he is far better than me......
i feel disappointed,why he did it perfectly but i didn't,but due to he is my best friend,i don't feel much jealous.i know jealousness doesn't work only make me selfish and do harm for our friendship.so i would better choose him be my competitor and work harder
@giada7raine (103)
• Philippines
6 Sep 09
Jealousy can indeed harm even end friendships.... thanks for your reply
@applefreak (3130)
• Singapore
11 Sep 09
there had been times when i felt envious of my friends' achievements in life. however, i've never felt jealous of them. in order to achieve anything, one has to put in efforts. i understand that my friends had put in a lot of efforts to get where they are today. given the same circumstances, i don't think i will be as hardworking. that said, i'm quite proud of my own achievements as well. we are all born with different abilities and there is no such thing as equality. some of us excel in certain areas while others excel in other areas.
@veejay19 (3589)
• India
7 Sep 09
I never feel jealous or envious of anybody, and that includes my friends success in life. There is no reason to be since whatever success has come to them is due to their hard work and merit.It makes me happy to see them leading successful lives and sad if they are struggling in life.I have had periods of success and failure in my personal life but that has not made me bitter but has given me an important lesson to learn from my mistakes.Whenever i needed my friends have come to my rescue and i am thankful to God for providing me such good friends.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
7 Sep 09
I dont feel jealous of anyone i care about. i do feel jealous of people i dont like that are pety and selfish like my sons gf. you know what they say, "the best revenge is to live well in spite of your enemies." so i guess that means make them jealous
@AKMEDIA2 (328)
• United States
18 Sep 09
I become really happy for them and proud that I can know such a person. I'm all for the little person making it big and totally support and do whatever I can to help them get there.
