Man wants to be alone?

well yeah basically we have broke up, it just happened really quickly, and i still want to be friends. but yeah maybe im just going to tell him im going to date other people since this thing wont work out .

Hahahahaha- I love love love this comment! It's cut and dry, straight to the point. Here's my take - and of course it's easier said than done. You tell him that you're leaving and that you're done with this bull-crap about "I need space" BS. You claim your space and move on. If he wants to get back together - and you're free, then go on ahead and get back together. For now, tell him this whole space thing makes it official that you've broken up!

Yeah, I agree with this one. Sometimes guys are just a bit cowardly when it comes to biting the bullet and saying "let's call it quits". Thing is, it's good news! It's great! He's saved you loads of time wasted over him! Now you can get out there with your girls and enjoy yourself, and maybe meet somebody who will recognise the amazing, intelligent, gorgeous woman you are! It took me a while to realise it, but I finally got that if I wasn't right for someone, they weren't right for me either, and when a woman starts trying to "fix" a relationship with a guy who's being distant, she'd be as well banging her head against a brick wall. And if you want a friendship, tell him that, then just leave it, if he doesn't get in touch, he isn't worth worrying about. Forget him, hon - your dreamboat's still out there somewhere, and how can you meet him if you're wasting time on someone who doesn't deserve your attention? Good luck, babe. :D

He already has therapy yeah, but i don't know if its really helping, I don't think they are doing enough to challenge his view on things. he's really rigid on how he thinks about stuff. also this break from me is totally his decision, from his outlook, even including what he thought would be better for me, but i dont think i can really change his outlook, ill give him the space he wants. i dont know if ill come back tho, i think when i think about it from all kinds of perspectives, its really that the majority of it comes down to that someone shouldn't cause u suffering just because they have their own issues. so i also agree on taking a break.

at least, u have tried. if he doesn't want to be helped at all, well, maybe it is time to give it a break then. we will see what happens next. good luck!

Yeah I try to help, but he doesn't admit to being depressed. I just give him comfort. But then he feels guilty if he thinks my needs are not being met, like if i want to go out with him, and he doesn't feel like doing anything, and then he wants to be alone because I think its both that he doesnt want me to see him cry and also that he just feels more pressure if he knows i feel sad? I don't know, I have asked him many times about breaking up but he's saying stuff like he thinks hes not good for me, and i try to get a straight answer because obviously if someone doesnt like me or feels like it doesnt work then i want to know. and i told him its ok to break up if he doesnt like me. But he says its not that, and that he still likes me, but its hard because he doesnt want to keep me waiting. Would a guy go to lengths to break up in a way that he feels like its not hurting u? because if someone said it to me like this, making things up I would be more hurt.

I mean, I know what you're thinking also. But my bf and i ain't planning to be married, i just want to go out with him more. I kept feeling like he was taking me for granted because we live close by and can see each other, but he doesnt really ask me out anywhere. he says he's depressed and doesn't feel like it, but ofcourse that makes me wonder how much he values me as a part of his life if he wants to cut me out, even for a short time. i mean hope he works out his own life also, i care about him very much.

*weigh

Yeah he has problems with depression, and falls under pressure. But he always falls under pressure if its dissapointing me. and then like since he's taking a break from me, makes me feel like some kinda liability. I go from sad, and wanting him, to feeling really angry because no matter if someone is depressed or not, as in my case, I would care about them. I don't know why he is not sure if we will be together anymore, I don't know why im waiting for him to decide, maybe its because I find it hard to let go of people. But I guess theres no point waiting.

Yeah you're right, either way I can't really be with him now, for his own issues. I do think of him as a friend now. I haven't had this feeling of emotional bonding with him for a while now. I feel for him though, obviously I care about him. His reasoning is that he doesn't want to hurt me anymore. I think he has emotional stability issues. Man I seem to get into relationships with ppl with emotional issues, i gotta deliberately seek out people who are more emotionally stable now :s