advice needed

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ok, i am marraded with 2 children from a prev marrage,and one with my current marrage. my husband had given in to our youngest for so long that he is finally seeing that it does work. i have tryed to tell him that i know what i am doing as this was my 3rd child, and his 1st. but at the same time doing it with out hurting his feelings. i have even recruited his mother and mine to help give him advice as he feels that i dont know anything. our daughter has just started pre school. now mind you she had been pooped trained for almost 2 yrs now, (she is 3 1/2 now)o have told my husband for 2 yrs that she needs to be in real panties in order for her to learn to go to the potty when she needs to go. he has faught me all the way and put pull ups on her, saying the he doesnt want to deal with the mess. even tho i have told him that pull ups make her lazy. now she has been in school, and has to wear real panties, she has been doing GREAT!!!! however today she said that she wanted to take a nap, so the husband put a pull up on her, and she peed in it till i saw that she was soaked and put her in panties again. the she had acidents in her panties. i am not trying to undermind my husband in anyway. but at the same time he needs to relize that this is not the first child i have potty trained and listen to me. so i guess that my question is how can i get him to listen to ME and at the same time no undermind him as a father????