being a love doctor

I am exactly like that. I can look at someone's life, explore their options and give them the best advice they could ever get. But my own life is a wreck! I make terrible decisions for myself. If I would follow my own advice I know I would be happier and healthier, but I have the kind of personality that wants to push boundries. I like to test my limits constantly.

hi marie, It is so easy to advise others because you can think with clear head and can analyse the whole problem and what can be the best solution for the problem. But when you yourself is involved then the thing is your emotions are involved and head is not clear and even when you know solution of the problem, your heart is not ready to accept it and this creates more problem. This is one reason why people can not advise themselves and if it is love problem then solution becomes more and more difficult.

it's easier as an observer than a participant. if you know a couple for years,you can offer solutions where as with your own spouse/partner it's just harder.sometimes love gets in the way of rationality.

This actually holds true to some other aspects and not just in love. As you would notice, a good doctor cannot treat his/her family member (most especially the spouse or the parents) properly. A good financial adviser could not be the best when it comes to his/her personal finances. The best teacher or disciplinarian, could not discipline his/her son/daughter the way she could her class. Why? Simply because of Logic and Emotion. If we are all logical people, then the wars wouldn't last this long. If we are practical in anything, nobody would be poor. If we could be as subjective in our decisions, then most of the times we'd make the right ones. But due to emotion, our logical thinking is somewhat distorted. We could then say emotions make a person weak and vulnerable. A good surgeon can operate perfectly on any patient, but once his spouse is in an accident, he will more often time lose his logic and starts to panic because this person who needs the treatment is someone he may lose. A person in love fears losing the person or that love and her logic is distorted thus wrong things may be given reason, cheating may not be considered that 'insulting', and to the point of being abused, we often times even provide the excuse instead of seeing what's happening - we are blinded by emotion thus we can't expect ourselves to make the right decisions. On the other hand, if you're the adviser. You have no 'emotional' attachment in the situation. Yes, you might be her friend, but you are not in love with that man. So you could easily pinpoint the mistakes he does to her. Lastly, it's not that you cannot find solutions, you know deep inside what to do, but emotions keep you from doing the logical thing to do because you are afraid of outcomes. So, if you could do away with 'emotion' and just stick to subjectivity in your decisions, you're either a rare breed, or you're some type of a fictional character like Dr. House. Hehehe..

I think you are lack of confidence for youself and your love.Since you have so many good ideas for your friends and succeed in helping them,you will also have a romantic story.Trust yourself or trust your lover no matter what happens,I think that will help youself. You can also write it down on your notebooks,and go through them everyday,you will find out what's the problem.Tell your lover,you want to relax,you want to be a happy one,you want him happy too...I think he will understand and solve the problems between you... Wish all shall be well ,and Jack shall have Jill. beeduzhe

I always do the same thing as you.I don't konw why either,when one of my friends has some emotion problems,I can tell her many ways to solve them,but when I meet the same problems,I will sit back and have no ideas to sovle them. Maybe women are strange animals.