How Many Men's Hearts Have You Broken?
By Brian
@wolfie34 (26771)
United Kingdom
September 8, 2009 12:10pm CST
I wonder if I am right in thinking that a man's heart is much tougher than a woman's? Not that I am being discriminatory here, but how many times do you hear that a man has had his heart broken?
Or is it a macho thing that men don't confess that their hearts have been broken? That men are made of tougher stuff and they don't lose their hearts over a woman or if they do they keep it quiet?
How many men's hearts have you lovely ladies broken in your life? Or can you honestly say you have never claimed a man's broken heart?
Have you ever intentionally or unintentionally broken a man's heart? How did it feel? Did you do it for revenge or did you do because you had to be hones with them that you just couldn't love them the way they wanted you to?
Do you think men's hearts heal quicker than woman's hearts when broken?
Do you think men get over a broken heart easier?
And how do you think men manage to mend their broken hearts?
Or are you of the belief that men's hearts just don't break and are made of stone?
Come on ladies your chance to boast of how many men's hearts you have broken or is it something you don't relish or enjoy?
Some men just deserve to have their hearts broke is that true too
I think I only had my heart broken once or twice in 38 years and that's the way I'm keeping it...
2 people like this
20 responses
@lovinangelsinstead21 (36850)
• Pamplona, Spain
8 Sep 09
Hi wolfie34,Mens hearts break alright but some of them hide it behind the macho man attitude. They don´t really mean to be that way it´s just the way these men are macho men on the outside and the reverse on the inside.
My three have cried and they are grown up now and have seen other men cry to of a broken heart but the situations are too intimate to talk about here.
As for me personally having broke a mans heart well no they have tried to break mine and almost did but not quite. I think us women are a touch stronger in some ways that they cannot be or don´t know how to be. All that bravado and macho man display usually hides a great need for love and a great need of emotional security.
Their hearts are not made of stone although they try to make believe that they are cool and self sufficient.
Take care wolfie.
1 person likes this
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
8 Sep 09
I think women are much tougher emotionally because they know how to deal with and control their emotions. For men some emotions are strange and they cannot deal with them so it's easily to shut them out or bury them, but it's not that easy, they have to come out somehow and usually it's through aggression rather than tears especially if their heart is broken. I appreciate and respect that not all intimacies can be revealed on such a public place, but thank you for your great response.
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
8 Sep 09
I only wish I didn't have it drummed into me as a boy NOT to show my weakness by crying. If only I could have cried I wouldn't be carrying around so much pain and hurt. Men should cry more I totally agree, thank you my friend, you too take care and I enjoyed reading your responses, most welcome.
@lovinangelsinstead21 (36850)
• Pamplona, Spain
8 Sep 09
Hi wolfie34,
When I say men I´m not a feminist at all far from it but having grown up with two brothers and these three in the House well I can say I have seen a bit of everything. My brother broke his heart over a girl and yes he did cry and my eldest Son too but also spent all week letting us know about it too. So while some can be emotional some can ba a bit on the aggressive side and this applies to women too. I believe that to be so. What I´ve just written here are not very intimate things really because no one knows the stories behind them. But yes I will say that I have seen in the past seven years men in our Family cry openly and this has been very puzzling and hard to deal with for me because they were always given to the machoman attitude all the time. I think Men should be allowed to cry more openly we should not think that they are too tough to get upset. Also women need to become more understanding about this way men are coming out with their deepest emotions although it is difficult for us to understand fully. Men are changing rapidly in leaps and bounds and boy is it hard to keep up with them sometimes. Only way I can explain it as I have three men in the House and had to bring up two others in the other House.
Cheers wolfie.
1 person likes this
@Humbug25 (12540)
•
8 Sep 09
Hi ya wolfie34
I have to admit that I have broke about 3 hearts in my 38 years! Two of them I was their first love so that would be understandable. The first one was the loser I was talking about the other night when I was 19. He was really posessive but boring and sure learnt alot from being with me and I mean like eating at restaurants and stuff. After 2 years I finally gave him the heave hoe much to my dad's delight.
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
8 Sep 09
I hate possessiveness nasty nasty! As is controlling, manipulation and bullying all of them make me see red. I admire you for sticking with him for 2 years! Mind you I had 9 years of it with two partners that filled all the above criteria. Now you know why I remain single, I attract the wrong'uns like you I guess!
1 person likes this
@pixeltwistr (613)
• United States
8 Sep 09
Heres what I think....women tend to be very open and they talk about their feelings a lot...women tend to get their heart broken then talk and cry and eat ice cream til they are over it. Then they are ready to jump in again...women tend to believe they will eventually find their soul mate.
On the other hand men tend to get their heart broken once...maybe twice if they are resilient....after that they tend to close off their hearts and not allow that to happen again....they may fall in love but they wont admit it and even if they are in love they wont completely trust it.
I think a lot of that difference is because boys are raised to not show emotions to not cry to be tough...and girls are allowed to cry when they are hurt or throw a tantrum when they are dissapointed.....
1 person likes this
@guybrush (4658)
• Australia
9 Sep 09
I haven't intentionally tried to hurt someone - but I once broke up with a longterm boyfriend because we'd reached the stage where we were thinking about getting engaged and I had an epiphany and realised I didn't want to spend the rest of my life with him. I think we were together out of habit by then - and I didn't think he'd be particularly cut when I told him it was best we parted. Unfortunately, he was pretty upset, and kept coming and parking outside my house each night for quite some time. I've found over the years watching other people that men are often quite shocked when women break up with them. They seem to have had no idea the woman wasn't happy. I don't think men get over a broken heart easier than women do - I think they brood more, and take longer to get back into the swing of things, whereas women often have a close group of girlfriends who get them back out there again and help cheer them up. I guess having our hearts broken is part of the rich tapestry of life - and it's worth remembering if the person broke up with us, it obviously wasn't ever going to work!
1 person likes this
@JenInTN (27514)
• United States
9 Sep 09
Hi wolfie! i'm thinking that broken hearts are part of life. I guess I may have broken a heart or two but it's not been out of meaness or revenge. I have actually stayed around a little longer because I couldn't stand the thought of hurting someone. I've had my heart broken too though. I'm like you. I haven't let many people in to have the chance of breaking mine. I think once or twice is enough.
1 person likes this
@sblossom (2168)
•
9 Sep 09
I don't think I have broken one man's heart in 38 years. I don't want to hide anything but I really can not think any one.
From my experience man's heart is not easy to be broken. If they failed in one relationship they would chase for next one.
In my life i knew some women who were hurted in bad relationships and never falled in love any more, I have never seen a man like that.
I had a collegue who was chasing me after one business meeting. However I did not show any interest on him. He wrote many letters to me and i did reply some. at last he gave up and he requested me to return these letters. I was shocked when I heard his request. Now he's happily married and I don't think he can remember my name even.
1 person likes this
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
9 Sep 09
I hope I can quote you here, you said "In my life i knew some women who were hurted in bad relationships and never falled in love any more, I have never seen a man like that" I have had been in two mentally abusive relationships and I have vowed never to love again and I am going to spend the rest of my life single, I could never go through that again, so you know at least one MAN now! Well at least at Mylot anyhow LOL!
@neo_matrix (884)
• India
9 Sep 09
quite a few till i realised what it exactly meant. i never use to accept anyone's love for i was too scared of getting hurt.i broke their hearts thinking that was best for them and me for i wasn't meant for it. then i liked somebody.. i couldn't hold myself back and say no and i admitted having fallen in love with him ,he too reciprocated.but it didn't work.i guess he found out better options.he left me in depression for almost a year and i reverted back to my old stance of never letting anyone hurt me again. i don't know about men but i think its pretty bad for a women
@ibuemma (2953)
• United States
8 Sep 09
OUCH...
Talking about heart, i thought there's no difference it's all human heart/feeling. Maybe it's just society make it so, Man/boy don't cry. Ahhhh, says who? Maybe we just don't see enough. (Man always has way to hide it )
How many men? Honestly? So far that I'm really certain is 2 only. One of them unintentionally and the other one actually...hmmm, let say he did something behind my back first, and I just had to 'let him go', and I think he deserved that.LOL..
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
8 Sep 09
Works both ways I guess. I guess I broke my first boyfriend's heart. I didn't break up with him to hurt him or anything, he just wasn't right for me. I wasn't comfortable. How do you mend a broken heart? Time and hopefully somebody else who is right for you...
@mikeysmom (2088)
• United States
9 Sep 09
as far as i know i have not broken anyone's heart. i could be wrong but mostly i am the one whose heart gets broken so i doubt i have left any broken hearts along the way. i have had some male friends that wanted more than friendship but i did not feel the same so there could have been some hurt feelings i guess.
@suzzy3 (8341)
•
9 Sep 09
I used to be a right little heart breaker then I grew up and realised men hurt as well.I think men take the heart break more than woman.I had my heart broken once and that was enough to make me learn my lesson,No more messing about with feelings.I have a lovely husband now and would never do anything to break his heart.
1 person likes this
@neelianoscet (9615)
• Philippines
8 Sep 09
I had never broke a man hearts before, I think i have not found yet the man who I like and reject if I dislike..I do not like to be felt pressure and any aggressiveness would be tantamount to an honest rejection. I do not like to make a man suffering longer, if I do not like, I mean it. Nothing could change my decision, unless he is patience and I get develop later on..It is better to be honest than to say yes all the time when inside i have a rebel heart..
@pjsr18 (340)
• Philippines
8 Sep 09
I think there's no tougher heart. If someone loves someone, he/she would really be broken-hearted if their relationship didn't work. I have had my heart broken so many times before and I could say that I loved truly because I was hurt. Remember, being "not" heart broken doesn't add up to someone's masculinity. Sometimes, it's the other way around.
@mohanmode (19)
• China
9 Sep 09
not man broken women's heart
not women broken man's heart
it is fate, we have no chioce but accept
good wish.
@voldrox (7191)
• India
9 Sep 09
well emotions are one of the most fragile things, one should never play with emotions, it doesn't take much to break someones heart, it could be a misunderstanding, revenge or even jealousy . . . emotions are not something to play with, people who don't have a heart might want to play with other's emotions, well i am a sensitive guy and if a girl breaks my heart i know i will get low and i honestly don't know if i will all try to act 'macho' and 'strong' well i don't think so, i am just graduating now and studies and carrier are one of the excuses i give for not being into a relationship still... i am just waiting for the right time and the right person, i honestly don't know how some people just break up so easily... so i guess i will be doing my own business now and let things happen later, i would like to listen to what women have to say here... nice discussion wolfie, have a nice day!
@submerryn (1304)
• Malaysia
9 Sep 09
Hi wolfie,
I wish to say that I've never had the priviledge of breaking a man's heart. Even if I wanted too, I never had the chance. I dont know if I had ever broke any man's heart unintentionally though. As far that I know of, I have never done that.
I thought a lady's heart is more fragile. Once broker, it will shatter. Men are born to be tough. They hide their emotions. Even if they are broken hearted, we wont know. That's why I said, I dont know if I've ever broken any man's heart or not..
@gracefuldove (1668)
• Malaysia
9 Sep 09
I think all of us have broken some. I know of a few. The rest must be weeping alone without me knowing it. Broken hearts are broken every day. It does not matter whether the man is stronger or the girl is weaker. Hearts are dainty, flimsy things. They broke too easily. Not from love actually but more so from rejection! Time heals all wounds;so broken hearts will as well.
@velocity_186 (879)
• India
9 Sep 09
My heart never broke coz i got a new C6 heart beater , its cool made up of high quality rubber never breaks :-P
it all happened after a 3 long yrs relation
the one i loved left me , because i didnt pay much attention
amin a girl gets with some other guy just bcoz she needs attention
and there was a reason behind it our parents and family issues
so i had to be away, it was only comm gap nothing else but she took it the other way , as if i was busy with some other grl
and flew away with another guy
it hurts
and she was'nt even sorry for what she did
she thinks she is right
i dnt understand y do grls have so much of arrogance y dont they accept it
they always think we guys cheat them but never think what they r upto
now she says to forget me she went into relation with other guy and that too in a month ..hello girls are u listening , is it TRUE , DO U FEEL THE SAME , WOULD U DO THE SAME .
but life goes on i cried for that girl i still remember those nights
she loved me even i did but maybe its what we call FATE
@EnglishTeaDuck (862)
• United States
9 Sep 09
I'm preety sure that I have never broken anyones heart. Noone has ever loved me enough to care whether I left or not.
Men don't break their hearts over fat ugly women. We're there for them to moan at about their problems with the attractive ones...lol
@TheAmilet (52)
• Philippines
9 Sep 09
I think men and women are just equal..they both have emotions..both get hurt and both have the right to express how they feel.
just like how a woman mends her broken heart it mightbe a little diffferent with men,
