How much is too much?

i want to look at it ,how much can i cost?

My best friend's son is really good at hockey. He has been playing since 3 yrs old now 11. I don't think NHL good but great for his age. I think they are crazy with the way hockey controls their lives. They are a fairly well off family but hockey is a very expensive sport and this is his second year playing for an out of town rep team. There is a local triple A team but the mother prefers he play on the out of town league (i think for status or something) they have to travel 2 hours for practices twice a week and tournaments 6 hours away once a month from friday to sunday. She is my best friend but i think she is crazy, the husband doesn't agrue with her about it but will not "help" out if it gets to hard getting him here and there he just gets upset that he misses school and homework time from these long practice times and that he get home so late on a school night. He says she wants him in it she will get him to it. We have a 14 yr old and 4 yr old, the oldest has has never had an interest in any sport and the youngest does. I do not think that I will ever encourage her into something that puts that much control on our lives, there is so many other things out there. I know I would never take out a loan to pay for something that wasn't a dire need and a sport is not one of them.

I would not have taken out the loan. I'm not a parent, so I can just go on what I think I would do. And I don't think taking out a loan, going into debt is as good as an example for her daugher as if she had her daughter learn to make due with what she has. She could still play on a team, like you said, the local one. And she could use this as motivation for her daughter. You know, that she could make that team better than the other one, that she could be a "big fish" in that pond.

My daughter is into basketball and you are right....all these sports are unbelievably expensive. I've always saved out from my income tax for her to play. Last season, however, I just could not. Since her dad did not come forth and help out, she had no choice but to join the school team which was still expensive but a bit cheaper. It still cost me 80.00 for special sneakers which were a requirement. Cheap still, compared to the 300.00++ that we were paying for her to be on the other team. So to answer your question: No, I would not take out a loan if there is a more affordable way to go. I felt bad asking my daughter to switch teams as she had been a real dedicated player. She is dedicated to the sport and as long as she could play, that is all that mattered to her.

Its not good to take a loan only when its necessary and if a person is talented in something or good at something then surely he/she will achieve some or the other day even without money and as you said there is a local team that costs less then let her be there whats the problem

Well I guess I would have taken the loan if I could afford the price cause I know that's what my child really wants. I want to take up figure skating but my mom can't afford it so it's kinda my frustration to not being able to do something you really really really like because of lack of money. But, If there really is no choice and want to cut down the cost then I would go for the practical way, after all what's important is she will be able to play ice hockey instead of none at all right?

I think it is too much. No way if I am parent can take loan of such amount and let her play in prestigious team. If I can afford easily, then its ok.

That is a really hard question. I didn't know you could take a loan on a 401K for that purpose. When I had one we could only borrow over sickness or to take out a mortgage on a new home. Does your niece know her mom did that? There is some distinct educational value to allowing her to play on the traveling team, but also a bit of risk. I guess for me it would depend on the family finances and whether the IRA still had enough in it after the loan to take care of real emergencies that might arise. Too bad there isn't some kind of scholarship that could help them out.

I have never been into sports. SO much of them are so violent... just don't see the point. ANd my kids never wanted to do any sports either so I never had to deal with it. But what bothered me the most... was... all the media and school and others that hype up "do sports"..."sports are where it is at"... and just promoting kids to do sports and how healthy it is etc.... okay, fine, but then they put such a huge price tag on it... and that is just for lessons and practice... that we can't afford to put them in sports. Everyone is all sports orientated.. yet no one ever does anything about the cost/fees. If you can't afford the sports... doesn't matter how much the kid wants to participate.

I am a father of two kids, and my eldest is a 13-year old girl. This early, I teach them how hard it is to make a living and they even know how to save money. But of course, I allow the to join sports and other activities that interest them. However, they ask permission from us first before joining and we talk about it with details especially the cost. I am just so glad that they don't force to join, if they think it will be a burden to us. I think there is a big difference between allowing our children to enjoy and spoiling them. Teaching them how to value money is preparing them in the future, especially when they are already grown ups and working. Thanks!

No. If she qualified for the traveling team, that's were she belongs. If she keeps at it, she may end up with a 4 year college scholarship, and the value of that is more than likely higher than the expense of being on that traveling team.

Hi Trace86, very tough to refuse a child, isn't it? Well, ur sister may have given it a deeper thought than any of us here can do. The child is at the brink of teenage, and may be if she is denied, she would resent it and hold it against her parents. May be she would go astray! Which is what is very possible at that stage. And ur sister may be considering higher contributions in future, may be she might take up some additional job works, that earn her more and give her a chance to make up the deficit. At least I would be thinking like that.

You have your children and they are yours for a moment. I understand your sister, she want her child to have the best possible opportunity. What is the purpose of having if not to give to those we love. How do we measure what is enough?

I personally wouldn't borrow against my 401K. I would however encourage my daughter to try out for a local team, the local team might be a good platform for her to win more medals and get a chance to compete in the nationals.

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