How to Decide If You're Ready For Marriage
By rajupaul
@rajupaul (973)
India
September 13, 2009 6:17am CST
Marriage is a big step in a relationship that two partners start to consider when they want to take their relationship further. Sometimes partners may be unsure if they're ready for marriage and find themselves thinking about what makes a person decide that marriage is the right step. What do you want to say about it. Loter.
Have a great day.
Raju Paul
4 people like this
13 responses
@LetranKnight25 (33121)
• Philippines
13 Sep 09
hello raju paul. that's not for me to decided yet. since am single and i haven't found the person who i think am gonna spend my entire life with.but for the sake of two couples or people who had been in relationships for a long time, it depends. whether they are mature or not.. enough to make that decision.
@Archie0 (5652)
•
19 Sep 09
A healthy relationship involves interdependence. After a divorce, you may be ambivalent, tossing between independence and codependence, fearful of both. This makes it difficult for someone to bond with you, yes? When you're ready to date, you're again interested in a healthy bonding, neither asking them to marry you on the second date (codependence) nor being impossible and fighting them every time they come close (independence).
@1anurag1 (3576)
• India
14 Sep 09
I think there is no hard and fast rule related to that.
but when u get adult and capable to nurture a family, and really need a partner. Actully when u get settled in job or business you dont have friends every time. then there must be some one whom you can trust and share your good and bads
that is the time for marriage
@dlr297 (5409)
• United States
14 Sep 09
you are so right that marriage is a big step. I believe that if their is any doubt that it is not the right thing to do. then they should not get married. and they should wait untill their is no doubt. Because i feel that you will know when it is the right time for marriage and their will be no doubt.
@PeacefulWmn9 (10420)
• United States
14 Sep 09
Hi Rajupaul. I married so young, and am now single, which suits me fine. Iffff I were to marry again, I'd make sure that our core beliefs were similar, that we had interests in common and could talk easily together, that we had mutual love and respect for one another and were in agreement about bigger things like God, where to live, how to budget money...all of those things.
Karen
@preethaanju (3000)
• India
13 Sep 09
good topic. Yes it confuses many when to marry.. in some communities, they marry off their children, the moment they attain marriageable age. Child marriages happen, but they dont come under the purview of this topic as they per se are illegal. I think its time to marry when we are finacially independent and are mentally and medically fit to run a family of our own. It has no set age or time. When one is mentally prepared to take on the responsiblity then its time to marry...thx
@mohitseth (568)
• India
13 Sep 09
u can decide it when u r setteled and feel like getting with someone.
but marrige decision should be taken very slowly bec. its ur life time investment.
@stephcjh (38473)
• United States
13 Sep 09
I think it takes both the man and the woman to decide and come to an agreement if the time is right for the both of them to marry. There should not be any kinds of doubts about it. If there is any, then it is not the right time to go through with it in most cases.
@rajupaul (973)
• India
13 Sep 09
How well you get along in your relationship with your partner can help determine if you're ready for marriage to this person. Marriage is a bond that holds to people together through the good times and the bad If you do not feel as if your relationship is strong enough to get through the tough times you may want to reconsider marriage.
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
17 Sep 09
I think that's what engagements used to be for, to spend time together and get to know each other and no fooling around. These days people are in so much of a hurry, they meet and jump into bed together and never get past the chemical attraction to get to know each other. Then there's nothing there but physical attraction and they eventually break up or, if they married, they divorce. Very sad.
@maygodblessu44 (7336)
• India
15 Oct 09
Hello my friend rajupaul Ji,
happy Deepawali
Deciding about marriage is to be left to parents, I think so. But under changing scenerio, this job has come up for marriage beuro and some special organisation. I bring out some thing from them as below.
http://www.enotalone.com/article/19349.html
[b]"Marriage counseling is becoming more and more popular these days. Many couples going through a tough time in their marriage automatically consider marriage therapy as a possible way to help the relationship survive.
Institution of marriage is something special that has become a part of every society since the beginning of human race. Marriage is a social, spiritual, or legal union of two individuals who usually start the life together with the intentions of spending the rest of their lives together. People marry for many reasons, but mostly for the formation of a family unit, and for procreation, education and nurturing of children.
However, things do not always go as planned and intended, and many married couples eventually find themselves in a situation when there is no escape from the fact that the marriage is in trouble. This is the time when those who believe in the marriage counseling, or therapy, start thinking of it as a last resort.
Marriage counseling is the process of counseling the couples in an effort to recognize and to better manage or reconcile troublesome differences and repeating patterns of distress. The counseling as a discrete, professional service is a recent phenomenon. The idea of the therapy was established as an accepted practice in the 1950s. Until that time the work of relationship counseling was informally fulfilled by close friends or family members.
Today, the counselor professionals believe that it is not right for a married couple to abandon their vows and forget the love that once had connected them together, just because of some character differences and human weaknesses. They try to do everything they can in order to change the stuck situation for the best." [/b]
May God bless You and have a great time.
@gracefuldove (1668)
• Malaysia
13 Sep 09
Well, you must at least know that emotionally you are correct for each other. Then the rest of the criteria will come into place. Are you happy with her educational level. She must of course be pretty i n your eyes. No doubt on that. If there is, you are not true to yourself. Must she have a job? What about family background. Are you happy with that. If all these are positive or neutral, I think you are prepared for marriage. Of course, you must have the money to get married.
@tintukm (1102)
• India
16 Sep 09
The decision of a lifetime,ain't this.
The correct time come when it's upon the person himself/herself,in terms of his/her life up till then and the way they wanna live it with a well suited partner.
The most apt time would be when one wanna settle in life after a job and a home, a life partner comes to mind.The responsibilities may be actually considered by the person himself/herself to lead a life other than him/he r alone.
The decision can come out late in the 40's .the 30's or even during the starting of the 20's.
@calai618 (1773)
• Philippines
14 Sep 09
I have to agree that marriage is definitely a huge step. I think you can never be sure if you are ready to get married because you will always have that uncertainty inside you. but i think if you are sure enough that you love the person you are in a relationship with and cannot live without him/her, if you are done doing stuff for yourself and is looking for someone to share your life with, and if you are sure that no matter what happens the two of you would still want to be together, then I guess it's the time you should decide on getting married.
@happydan (12)
• China
14 Sep 09
I don't know that,too.I just want to learn from you.I think the partners must be happy when they get together,and they can figure out how to keep this feeling in the future days.And they must get ready to take the responsibility to each other.