Do you really care what people think of you?
By jellymonty
@jellymonty (2352)
September 28, 2009 6:47pm CST
I've just wasted three hours of my precious time trying to convince my cousin to not care about what people think of her..she's really a self consious freak and she constantly worries what people think of her and she's always trying to please everybody..
You see she's overweight and always goes on about how she can't seem to lose weight and that people think she is a fat pig. She hasn't got a boyfriend and she thinks its because she's fat. Personally I've had enough of hearing her banter and misery 
I on the other hand don't give a damn of what people think of me.. I always say the fact that somebody has taken the time out to think about me shows am important in some way, whether they think good or bad of me.
I really can't stand self consious people as they are time watsers in my opinion. and yes I am brutal and staright to the point. I don't have time to think about what other people think of me..
So do you care about what others think of you?
I on the other hand don't give a damn of what people think of me.. I always say the fact that somebody has taken the time out to think about me shows am important in some way, whether they think good or bad of me.
I really can't stand self consious people as they are time watsers in my opinion. and yes I am brutal and staright to the point. I don't have time to think about what other people think of me..
So do you care about what others think of you?6 people like this
32 responses
@fergus (817)
• Ireland
29 Sep 09
Hi jellymonty, Yes i have to say i do care what people think of me.
I have always been like that its always what other people wan,t with me,
like what every makes other people happy i always put myself second.
I to am over weight but thats not my reason for been like that
its just the way i am i i will never change.
Great discussion fergus.
1 person likes this
@jellymonty (2352)
•
29 Sep 09
Hey Fergus, is that you on your avatar? If that is, then your cute 
And I'm not just saying that to make you happy.. it really is a cute pic.. but I understand where you coming from but don't make it a habit of pleasing anyone as they will take advantage of you..
And I'm not just saying that to make you happy.. it really is a cute pic.. but I understand where you coming from but don't make it a habit of pleasing anyone as they will take advantage of you..
@mama_bear (1118)
• Canada
1 Oct 09
hey fergus, embrace the freak within, so there is more of you to love who cares. who really wants a rexy boy huh? it is now more socially acceptable to carry a little more round the middle and other parts. i have stopped busting my butt to try to shed what little extra there is. love me love my rubenesque figure, so fergus welcome to team chunk! GO TEAM CHUNK!
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
29 Sep 09
"But it's alright now,
I've learned my lesson well.
You can't please everyone
So you've gotta please yourself."
(Rick Nelson and the Stone Canyon Band)
And I do.
Lash
1 person likes this
@jellymonty (2352)
•
29 Sep 09
Nice one gramps.. I like this one:
"people are b*stards, with b*stard quoted fillings" LOL
@Frederick42 (2024)
• Canada
30 Sep 09
I am not at all bothered about what others think of me. My life is totally my business and nothing to do with anybody else. I am not suffering from inferiority complex. It is inferiority complex which makes people so much bothered about what others will think of them.
1 person likes this
@jellymonty (2352)
•
30 Sep 09
My life is totally my business and nothing to do with anybody else
I like that statement.. pretty much sums it up
I like that statement.. pretty much sums it up
@Jennlk84 (4206)
• United States
29 Sep 09
I am a very self conscious person, so yes, I care a lot about what others think of me. I know that some of the reason is my weight. So maybe that is something your friend and I have in common? One thing I will say though is that just because I am self conscious and worry A LOT about what people think of me, I don't really talk about it much. So I don't by any means think I annoy others with that problem that I have.
It can definitely be something hard to deal with because it really does leave you worry.. A LOT. Maybe the next time she "complains" to you - lend a listening ear and once you've done that maybe make some suggestions to her. Maybe offer to take walks with her/work out with her, etc. Things that will help her feel better about herself?
1 person likes this
@IMEzekieL (498)
•
29 Sep 09
I agree. I also want to say that this isn't annoying at all.
1 person likes this
@mama_bear (1118)
• Canada
29 Sep 09
no, not really. i long ago stopped trying to please others, it started with my mother. when i realized that i could not please the most important then person in my life, i stopped trying. if i could not please her then why bother with others. since then, well i have lived my life the way that i want.it is simply that way. funny enough in spite of the fact that i do not like people and am usually my usual abrasive sarcastic self. well this seems to make people like me. i guess because there is no pretense with me, what you see is what you get. it is more important to please self first, that is the best way to be happy. when you are yourself and not trying to make people like you, you lose that hint if desperation that some people do not respond well to. it makes you more approachable, and people are envious of people like us who are not slaves to the conformist police.
1 person likes this
@jellymonty (2352)
•
29 Sep 09
Yeah you the same as me.. what you see is what you get and I have seen that people tend to relate to you more when you are just yourself and not try to please everyone. I for one am fortunate that I've never divulged into pleasing anyone.. unless it's a hot date and there's a possibilty of me getting some 
@mama_bear (1118)
• Canada
30 Sep 09
ha ha i totally feel that ha ha. but see the thing is even if one wanted a hot date and to get some. the more abrasive and yourself you are, the higher the chance of them trying to impress you, ha ha win win.
1 person likes this
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
29 Sep 09
You see, when you're fat and find things that aren't really pretty about yourself, you can't help but listen to what others think. It's not that they want to, but it's their lack of confidence.
If I were you, you'd help her in the sense that you'd both go to the gym or something like that.
I for one try not to be conscious but there really are times when you can't help it.
I think I'm not overly self-conscious because many have told me I look good and dress well. I am overweight too but they say I can carry it and I don't look dirty.
So, I know how she feels, she just needs to find a way to get more confidence.
1 person likes this
@jellymonty (2352)
•
29 Sep 09
I'm sure you look fabulous in whatever you wear.. and it's nice to know you have confidence in yourself
@ladym33 (10979)
• United States
29 Sep 09
Only people in my life that are important to my life, like my own family and my inlaws, and my kids teachers. But if people I don't know or don't know very well, I really don't care what they think, they are not important enough to me for me to worry about what they think. Sure I would rather people like me, but if they don't oh well, what can I do about it. I don't like being misjudged that has always bothered me, but is someone just doesn't like me for some reason or they think I fat or what ever what can I do about it. I have people who love me, I don't need to worry about unimportant people who do like me for some odd reason. It used to bother me, but the older I get the less I care. I have enough people in my inner circle that like and love me so I don't care what the others think.
1 person likes this
@bitoffun (203)
• United States
29 Sep 09
The only time it bothers me about what someone thinks of me is when they don`t like me and I don`t know why. Or if they get mad at me for some reason and don`t tell me why. I am who I am. If you have a problem with me then talk to me. I won`t change but at least I will know what your problem with me is.
@nrn2003 (661)
• United States
29 Sep 09
I dont care what other people think of me. I am who I am and no one can change me or make me do anything that I truly dont want to do. I am hoping that other people can be that same way as well, but it isn't alwyas that simple. People are very insecure, so they do care what other people think of them. The only person I really care what they think of me is my bf. he is honest and lets me know when I look bad, or do somethign stupid. Other than that people can kiss my booty :)
1 person likes this
@Laurie1986 (384)
• United States
29 Sep 09
I probably care more than I should. That said, to an extent I have to care because of what I do...as a writer and a blogger I have to somewhat care what people think of my opinions because it affects my reputation as a writer and it affects the reception of what I write--if I say something too controversial, it could really come back to bite me. You could argue that what people think of my opinions is separate from how they judge me as a human being and that I shouldn't care about the latter...in which case, yeah, I probably care too much.
But when you're talking about the way she behaves in general, and the fact that she goes on about it all the time and drives you crazy, she could have any number of personality disorders that contribute to that behavior, in which case it's not entirely her fault.
1 person likes this
@jellymonty (2352)
•
29 Sep 09
Yes as a writer it's important to get feedback of what you've written about so I suppose it fair to wonder what people think. But I was referring more to whether you care what people think of your character and self being. As for my cousin, I've done everything in the book I can think of.. paid her gym memberships, drag her to take walks, sign her up to diets and stuff but she is a lazy person so it's hard to motivate a lazy person.
@Realsmack (155)
• United States
29 Sep 09
I use to care about what others thought about me until I grew up. Your cousin doesn't have a man because she doesn't have self esteem. Having low self esteem is a huge turn off for anyone who has a brain. I wouldn't want to spend my time catering to your esteem just so you can feel ok about who you are.
I've grown to know that you can't please everyone so why try?
1 person likes this
@linamachina (521)
• United States
29 Sep 09
Hi jellymonty, I thought about your question for a while, because I thought at first I really don't care what people think of me but then I thought how about even now when I post this, I will wonder what people will think of what I am writing and I wonder what their impression will be. But I mean I do care but at the same time if people thought what an idiot, it wouldn't hurt me or make me whine about it. I am curious about other people's impressions about me but I don't make it a priority that their opinion matters more than mine own towards myself. I try to be the best person I am and if someone doesn't like me, then I wouldn't waste my time trying to get that person to change their mind. So, I guess my answer, is I do care to a certain extent. Thanks for the topic!
1 person likes this
@jellymonty (2352)
•
29 Sep 09
LOL no worries I understand every word you've written so you get a thumbs up from me
@codris (781)
• Italy
29 Sep 09
hi, i don't care what people thinks of me, i think that the only thing that a person have to do is to be a good person.
Don't care about them but always respect any other person, if they respect you.
When you meet the right person, he will not care about your body, but your mind and your heart.
1 person likes this
@coldmoon (1088)
• France
29 Sep 09
If they're the ones I love, I really care about what they're think about me. I'll be glad if they praise me, and if they're reasonable in finding my bad point, I'll try to fix it. But for the people hate me or I hate, I don't care. Anyway their comments on me are not always exact, and even if they're are, they can't bother me.
1 person likes this
@syankee525 (6261)
• United States
29 Sep 09
well she need to learn to love herself first before anyone will. but i could careless what people thing of me. as long i go out and treat everyone right.
dont care if they dont like my tatoos, peircing or how i dress
1 person likes this
@Archie0 (5652)
•
29 Sep 09
Hello jellymonty.Well you know i am a very introvert type of human being sometimes, this is my very bad point that i really think what people really talk about me.I am a bit over weight and that makes people to talk about me and make fun of me, by this time if any time you read or responded my responses you must have known how much it costs me as i have expressed many thing in some discussions.I dont like when i am a laughing spot for anyone because i get hurt easily and so i cannot take my attention from people when they see me and start gossiping
@xannebull (1793)
• Philippines
29 Sep 09
sometimes, i care about what people might think of me, especially about how i dress up. but most of the time, i don't care of what they think of me as long as i know that i am doing the right thing, who are they to judge me by the way, they are not the one who feeds me.
@IMEzekieL (498)
•
29 Sep 09
Oftentimes, yes I do! I'm a self-confessed introvert. I admit that I'm a shy person so this kind of thought is always present in me.
1 person likes this
@thebest1988 (603)
• China
29 Sep 09
I care about other people's view of ,because my self-esteem is too strong ,I know this is my character weaknessses ,but it is too hard to change. Now,I have to learn to do not care about my views of others. I live for myself. do you agree with me ?
1 person likes this
