Please be consistent
By rosdimy
@rosdimy (3926)
Malaysia
October 3, 2009 4:03am CST
I do understand that there are members who like to participate as much as possible, probably to have an increase in their earnings. So far I have seen postings which brought a mixed reaction in me. The main point is what I perceived as inconsistencies in the life of certain members.
In the first example someone claimed to be a full time student. After many days the claim changed to being a full time worker. Soon after that back to being a student. Which status is true?
One or two seem to have changed gender at least twice. Are you a male? Then how come you wrote about your boyfriend? Or are you a ...? If you are a male then you should be posting about your wife, not your husband. It is difficult to accept it as a typo, because a few weeks after that you change back to being a true male.
Please be consistent, so people like me would not be confused as to the real you.
5 people like this
7 responses
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
3 Oct 09
I am as confused as you are when I come across people who have many faces. Only recently I responded to a lady about falling in love and she wrote that she is in love with her girlfriend and fear to hurt her feelings I responded to her saying that I would not fall in love with the same species. She did not reply. Unfortunately some people like to act and pretend to be who they are not. But in the long run the truth will prevail.
2 people like this
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
3 Oct 09
I saw that one too Zandi and indeed it was very confusing
I am waiting to see what other activity we will see from that user so that we can understand and see if things are what they appear to be - or if it is a really difficult situation.
1 person likes this
@rosdimy (3926)
• Malaysia
3 Oct 09
It could have been a case of the lady copying somebody else's discussion from somewhere, pasting it, and submitting without making the necessary changes. We tend to have many similar problems, but a posting should be consistent with what we are. On the other hand she may really be in love with someone of the same gender, and feels insulted with your words.
I wear many hats. All of my postings concerning my personal life have been consistent, relative to my religion, culture, and experiences. Someone reading my postings may be able to get a rough idea of who I am. It would be difficult to understand a person who are inconsistent with their postings.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
3 Oct 09
hi fellow mylotters I know my using my last name may'
have confused some but I allude to my husband a lot
and to things only females do, so hope by now people
know I am a she,not a he.
@vopols (204)
• Philippines
3 Oct 09
Rosdimy it is really a fact that people sometimes tries to act as if it is their opposite like a student and after a couple of months becomes a worker.Maybe they are trying to feel as if to be like someone even if it's not true why? They just want to help those who are in need of advice I mean if I am a worker how can I listen to a respond coming from a student to whom which cannot relate with me? So some people would pretend to be like someone simply because they wanna help.
It is not a 100% that most of the people here are true some are just pretending to be like someone because they are afraid to exposed themselves to public even if it's online. For me it's doesn't really matter if one pretends to be or not to be what matters most for me is the value of helping one another in expressing one's ideas and feelings towards a particular topic.
Rosdimy if you found out that several individuals here are inconsistent with regards to their true identity then we cannot force them or blame. You are a good observer rosdimy and that makes me think that you are indeed a consistent person because only consistent person detects inconsistencies of others.
2 people like this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
3 Oct 09
hi rosedimy yes those discussions are really confusing,'
as I wonder if they are talking about their own problems
or a hypothetical problem.
@rosdimy (3926)
• Malaysia
3 Oct 09
I can see your point, and your argument has some validity, even though there might be others who may think differently.
I am concerned about members starting discussions as if they have certain issues with their life. If their intention is to help then they should say so, and cite the incidents which they personally know, instead of making it look as if they experienced them. One person even changed his gender to 'female', to suit his post. Now it is back to 'male'.
1 person likes this
@worldwise1 (14885)
• United States
3 Oct 09
These questions have arisen in the past here on myLot, rosdimy, and my only conclusion is that when people don't stick to the truth it is easy to bungle things up. I, myself, have stated that if a discussion is purely fiction it should be posted as such. This is a recurring situation here.
@rosdimy (3926)
• Malaysia
3 Oct 09
This problem happens in a few other forums that I have checked. I prefer having good thoughts about each member, because even though we have differences in ideals and beliefs, there are things that we can share.
The best alternative for me would probably be to ignore the guilty ones. But this could be the start of a break down in the cohesion of this community. We all have something positive that we can contribute.
I believe trust is important between the members of any community.
@sid556 (30959)
• United States
3 Oct 09
I haven't picked up on any of that type of stuff lately but then again I haven't really been looking for it. It is rare that you find long time members playing such obvious games. It is usually newbies that are just here to see how much they can earn. Once they realize how much time it actually takes to really earn much on here then they get bored and move on. If you aren't here to be real and enjoy meeting others then it would get old really really fast I would imagine.
1 person likes this
@rosdimy (3926)
• Malaysia
3 Oct 09
I was not looking for it because I came to myLot with an open mind, but I could not help noticing it. Most were newbies. One of them was a male, because I checked his profile. He was active, and I saw him almost every day. A few months later he made a posting which would make anyone reading it think this person is a female. I checked the profile. A female. Maybe I misread the profile a few months back, so I looked at this person as a female. Yesterday the profile states that this person is a male. I checked because he/she was writing from a male viewpoint. At this moment I am not sure whether this person is a man, or a woman.
Was it the work of a hacker, who wanted to sow confusion and mistrust among us?
Actually I am not bothered if a person changes the gender in his.her posting because we do have similar problems. At least anyone doing the copying please keep to your gender, and make any necessary changes.
Yes, maybe those who are here only for the money will eventually seek what they perceive as greener pastures.
@sderringer (303)
• United States
3 Oct 09
I haven't seen much inconsistency either sid556 but it could be that I am not as observant as others are or maybe I don't care who they are pretending to be so I don't notice that they were male one day and female the next. With some of the names and pictures used here it is too hard to tell gender and I am too old to remember whether or not I saw that exact name in a previous discussion days earlier and they said they were someone else or was or wasn't working. I hope I am making this understandable. I do agree with you though sid556 that if you are here only for the earnings and not because you like to voice an opinion or make friends, then you will surely not stay here long. I can be quite oratory at times and yet I don't make anything but it doesn't bother me at all yet because I love to join in on the discussions and I love to type!
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
3 Oct 09
You really think those are typos?
Those are usually cheaters copy/pasting stuff from other places and not bothering to read what they are copying
I remember a fine example of a guy telling us about the pains he went through when giving birth to his first child and a few days later was back at school and having problems with a boy he had a crush on! There is no place for those people here as that is not what myLot is about at all.
Here is a friendly place and trust is the base of any friendship
1 person likes this
@rosdimy (3926)
• Malaysia
3 Oct 09
I never believed that they were typos. I wax trying to be civil. A few of them are still active. This can smear myLot, and become a 'weapon' for those who have a grudge. The newbies may become confused and disillusioned.
I do not want to report them to Admin, but at the same time I am concerned about myLot's integrity.
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
3 Oct 09
I can definately understand you wanting to be civil
That is how I try to be when I come across these things and I have to bite my tongue and stop my fingers from typing what I would really like to say. Indeed they will cause the downfall of myLot if they continue to abound and that is why they should be reported.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
3 Oct 09
rosdimy surely you are talking to just a minority
of people here so why word this as if it pertains'
to all of us. I have been as consistent as I know
how in trying to convince all who read my discussions
that no I am not a man, I used my last name as user
'name simply because I could not think of any other
user name I really liked. I am a woman, an elderly woman
and I have never claimed to be young, or male, or having
a job. I am retired, I am a democrat so sue me. but
why not just say some of you, not are you a male etc.
I agree we should all be consistent and also truthful
1 person likes this
@rosdimy (3926)
• Malaysia
3 Oct 09
My apologies. Maybe I should have worded it differently. Ungortunately that has been the way I am. It is to a certain extent the sesult of the way I was brought up. A cultural thing, where in certain cases words are said in a general manner. Those who are very close to the stove will feel the heat. But then they may have a very thick skin.
Yes, it was a small minority. I believe that in a community we try to understand each other. In this way if soneone faces a problem we may be able to give a better suggestion. The chances of being misunderstood is less if we are consistent. I said 'we', but I do not mean that all of us are guilty. I cannot say 'you' because you are not at fault. I see myself as an accessory if I keep quiet abut the discrepancies.
I have no doubt about you. I have read many of your postings though I did not comment on all of them.
No name is quoted because people can change their line of action. As it is the people I noticed doing it seem to have stopped. It is hoped that this discussion will make anyone with the intention will think at least twice before doing so.
@manong05 (5027)
• Philippines
4 Oct 09
I haven't run into a discussion like that yet but if I do, first of all, I will try to analyze if the person is portraying a hypothetical situation and places himself as the main subject or main actor in the scenario he created. Otherwise I believe that dishonesty and inconsistencies are annoying just for the sake of earning points.
cheers!
@rosdimy (3926)
• Malaysia
4 Oct 09
I started this dicussion after giving much thought to it. I tried looking at it from more than one angle. I have given several of the reasons, in my comments above. Taking all things into consideration, it was hard to convince myself that they were talking about hypothetical situations. What about the gender change in the profile?
I am not dismissing the possibility of other reason(s), however slim the probability is.