how do u know if he really loves you??

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im a single mother..my bf is very much single..i caught him cheating on me a week ago, the worst thing is, i knew the girl he flrted..i cried, got myself drunk, he told me he was sorry and he didnt intend to do that..though i accepted him again coz i really love him, the pain is still there i just cant forget it especially if he is txting me..but god knows im really trying my best to pick up the pieces..to go on with our lives.. i know im not the kind of girl that he deserves, coz i messed up my own life in the past..got my image destroyed because of some vices..im thinking if i just have to let it go..just watch him walk out of my life even if he makes me happy.. for the next 6 months he would be away for some training..i dont know what to do..i love him but having him doesnt melt the pain he caused me..