When you are lonely ,why not try something different? Volunteer.

Hi Hatley, I haven't done volunteer work but just helping friends etc when ill or needing the help I get so much satisfaction from the way they are so happy and appreciative for the help they may not of got from someone else...it makes you think sometimes even though you are not paid as a volunteer you are in another way..from seeing the happy appreciative and thankful ways others are for your help...LoLo

A couple of years ago I volunteered to be a Big Sister. I went in for the interview and everything seemed to go so well. But then they asked me if I had any health problems. When I got to the part about me being bipolar, I saw her face change. She told me that I wouldn't qualify because of my "mental illness." 'Cause you know me, I'm just unstable. Shoot, I'm more normal than most people with absolutely no health problems. Now I can't see myself volunteering. I have another back surgery October 19th, and that will be quite painful to come back from. I have taken the job in my church though for sending cards. You know, sending cards to people in the church who are sick, sending cards to people who gave prayer requests, sending postcards to people who visited...I really like encouraging people. I haven't been to church in a month myself because of the back issues.

I might do some of that this winter. With gasoline rising again, our meals on wheels programs are going to be short of delivery people again. I don't get lonely, but I spend most of my time alone and I know that's not good for me. Since there's no employment here, I might as well be of some use to someone!

Hi Hatley, That is a very godd advice, there is so much people can do to help others as well as helping themselves, I myself has done such things when I used to work as a cleaner in an old people's home, some of them cannot remember why they are there and always saying they have to get home to cook, but I always stay back after my work and keep them company sometimes read to them, I made so many good friends there and made them laugh too, sadly the place is closed and I'm no longer working because of my disablity but it was very up lifting, people should try it, it will make a big difference to their lives, thank you Hatley. Tamara

You are so right about the lonliness on here,I am lucky with my life.Normally got someone knocking the door down to get in for a coffee and a chat.I thought about volunteering when I first gave up work but have been so busy it has amazed me.It is a great thing to do to help others and make friends share interests and do something worthwhile,good discussion.

Yes you are right. You can do lot by helping others. Helping others will help you forget your worries and soon you will realise how small your problems when compared to other's problems are. Hope this discussion is well read by all here at mylot. If you have the will you have the way.

Hi Hatley...you are right. Earlier this year I became a volunteer driver for a health and community care association in the next town. It has changed my life. Because the town I live in is classified remote, the elderly or disabled or those without the means can be driven to shopping or doctors appointments or similar. Getting to know people in my community, whom I normally would not come into contact with is proving really enjoyable. One of the trips I do is an 8 hour round trip...plenty of time there to swap stories. I feel needed and valuable and to know I am helping is a good feeling.

When my daughter had to do some volunteer work for school, she was talking about helping out an elderly person, but we didn't know who to get in touch with to set it up. So we ended up volunteering at a cat rescue organization. We are still doing it.

I couldn´t agree with you more Hatley, and I think this is superb advice. Obviously not everyone has the time or the ability to volunteer, but all of us could reach out to another person. I used to volunteer for a charity which got groups of otherwise housebound elderly folk together for tea and a chat. It was a very small commitment for me, just a couple of hours on a Sunday afternoon once a month and the use of my car and fuel. But it was remarkably rewarding and I enjoyed it very much. I met many interesting new people, both the elderly who I drove and the other volunteers, and had some fascinating conversations.

I never experience to work as a volunteer but i wish i could. Now, especially in Manila area needed more volunteers for the typhoon Ondoy and Pepend. Volunteer to repack food like rice, can goods, dress, and others. I wish i can participate and devote my time but its too far in my place. I know in this time of loneliness that i am going through now will help me somehow to forget my problem. I am salute those volunteers who are doing their job without any amount involve.

Yes,that is extremly right.As you pay for anyone else,the reward will warm your heart and you will leave away of lone.There are so many people need help in todays world,you just to sacrifize a little in your life,they would get huge asists.

This is excellent advice! It is not only a way to feel good it is a good way for someone to expand their social circle and meet new people. Volunteering can lead to all sorts of things; even a new job!

Bingo! Great discussion topic. Volunteering is one of the best ways to not be lonely. Had a babysitter long time ago who was divorced and was constantly moaning about how lonely she was. I told her to start doing volunteer work. Her life to that point consisted of staying at home feeling sorry for herself and dating losers from whatever dating service she signed up with the most recently. I don't know how far she took my advice but I hope she did. Her self esteem was really low. I told her volunteering would help her see what a terrific person she could be. Better yet while doing good for others she just might meet another terrific person instead of these unbelievable morons she kept finding at the dating services. Just to keep things in perspective. I know everyone wants a soul mate but it is important to do something with yourself that makes you feel valued when your by yourself.

I completely agree with you. Everyone wins with volunteering. Not only will it give you personal satisfaction by being able to help those who are in need, it will also be extremely beneficial for you. Volunteering is a great opportunity to make friends, which helps alleviate long term loneliness. It will also give you valuable experience which you can put on your resume should you search for another job. References too. I got the job I have now by volunteering in college and after- without that volunteer activity I am sure i would still be unemployed.

That is a GREAT idea! Thank you for pointing this out to people. I have volunteered for years in different areas and met some great people. I have more events happening than I know what to do with, so I don't have time to be lonely. You don't only have to volunteer in the medical field, either. I volunteer at an elementary school and for a dog rescue group. There are MANY opportunities to find things that are of interest to you!

I think that is a great idea, Hatley. Helping out others is so rewarding, though you do not even know them personally. Seeing them smile at you without even saying anything is so heartwarming because you know they appreciate what you did to them and i am a firm believer of paying it forward. One day the favor or deed you gave to them, they in return do it to others too and it will surely take your mind from thinking about your loneliness or problems.

This is so true Hatley. when you are doing something for another person then everyone feels good. The person receiving and th person giving. We have to help each other all of our lives because this is what Jesus asked us to do. He commanded us to love one another and we do this by helping one anther. Great post. You are right on the ball

That is a very good point you made. In fact many counselors tell their patients that are suffering from loneliness and low self esteem to to look for opportunities to help others who are in worse shape than them. I think this is very sound therapy because when you help someone else you can't help but feel good about yourself.

This indeed a very very good idea of to kill some time. Actually, it's very satisfying to volunteer in some homes and care for others. I was once a volunteer too, and I think those time were very very fruitful for me during those periods while I was volunteering.

Good day to you my friend. Yes I agree with you about being a volunteer in order for a person not to be lonely. But there are people who are lonely but yet they prefer to be alone and try nto avoid individuals to mingle with them especially these individuals who are depressed and needs to be alone in order to reflect things. But there are also lonely people who lacks social support from their parents or loveones and so beinbg a volunteer is an outlet for them not to be lonely.