I met a new friend

Hi, Pat....I think everyone is bottled up with some level of anger and pain. The difference between people is that some have no problem opening up to the world, and letting them in, and others prefer to keep their personal lives private. With that said, it also depends on whom we are talking to....if we are made to feel comfortable around the other person, if we can see the honesty and sincerity in that person, an acceptance no matter what we are like, if that person seems to say, "I am a good listener, and we all have our troubles...I am just like you", then it makes it easier for others to open up with that person. Apparently you must fill those shoes, and that is something you should be proud of. There are alot of "NICE" people in this world, but being "NICE" doesn't mean they are easy to warm up to. They can often remain distance to everyone else, thus not making others free to speak as they so choose.

Hi Pat. My daughters and I have experienced this same "phenomenon." We've discussed and decided that it most likely means we look and behave in a way that makes us approachable. We listen, we care, thus people open up. Karen

Hi, Pat! I know that, if I were uncomfortable about something I knew about someone, I couldn't be friends with that person. In fact, something similar happened to me a couple of months ago. I'm polite when I see her, but I discourage anything beyone saying hello. Good luck with it!

I'm thinking you must be really good at making people feel comfortable if you you can get them to open up like that. But I guess you need to find some way to set boundaries so that people don't unload things on you that you're not comfortable with hearing.

Sometimes people need to vent their problems to strangers or newly met friends. Its just like when you are upset with someone "they" say to write a letter to them but then don't mail or give it to the person. Its a way of releasing the anger built up inside. So when people start telling their life story just listen and take it in because you are there to help them feel better especially if you understand their problems or have gone thru the same things that they are going through now. I'm a good listerner so it really doesn't bother me to hear peoples stories. Its also a good way to make connections with people.

Well if you see them as a friend due to a hobby you have.If they say no more about their problems then i think you should give them the chance they deserve,but if it bothers you that much i would just walk away from the friendship as it may cause some problems.Perhaps they told you as they needed to unload their problems on someone or that they wanted you to hear it from them rather than anyone else.

maybe somehow they might be feeling that as you yourselves have gone through a lot in life,maybe you can help them in some way,after all,experience is a great teacher and words of encouragement will help.

I was told a long time ago that certain people just look like they can help. I was one of them. He needs to vent somewhere, and you were kind enough to pay attention to him. I have lots of people who want to tell me more than I want to know as well.

hi savypat I have the same feeling at times. Here in Gold Crest several people have talked to me, and I began to feel like a mental counselor for awhile but I think its because I tend to show sympathy. Maybe you strike others as a comfortable person to talk to, a good listener perhaps. then they may be people who are very open about their personal lives. If you can bear it sometimes you might actually help someone, but if it makes you very uncomfortable you must find a courteous way to leave without making them angry with you. Too if you yourself have some similar hurt then a person who dumps on you with a similar hurt may be triggering your buttons. I would sort of cool this person with saying tmi, standing for too much information. maybe then they will realize this is something that makes you very uncomfortable. You could then suggest they go to a mental counselor for some needed help.

Hi Pat, Sometimes that happens to me too. People just seem to find that I am easy to talk to and will end up telling me way to much information and then think that we are "friends". You seem to be that type of person that is also very easy to talk to also. It has to be your decision if you want to "take on" this person as a "friend", meaning do you want to get involved with their "stuff". It has to be up to you if you think that this is someone that you have enough in common with to get that involved with. If not the I suggest that you just keep it very casual or try to decided if you don't want to be involved with her at all.

I was in a similar position as you until I decided to set some boundaries although that is not always possible or easy! You must be a nice person who listens well and has sage advice! Sometimes we just have to state that we just don’t wan to know

Hi savypat! I think it must mean that you are a person that others can be very comfortable around. Maybe they wanted to tell you because they knew you were going to be friends and whatever it was that they told you..they didn't want you to find out later and it cost them your friendship. They may very well want you to help them but I don't know if I would jump into that one with both feet just yet. Sometimes people do just need someone to give them the time of day and listen. There have been a hundred times I wish I had someone to just vent to.

nice.......:)

i was have a conversation like that, but in my way.,, u must be yourself even you are nobody. don't let anybody else make u feels so nothing and uncomfortable because God make you so special,its depend on you, if you want to make changes just be yourself. so I think, maybe u should hear them, but don't let them change your principal of your life.

Hi there You are nice person i can tell with your discussion but not everything you need handle and work this out.It's not your duty.sometime you just listen their pain and give a good smile.Of course if you have a good way to help them.it's will nice too..