How does one deal with having a child die?

We lost my cousin (we grew up in same house both families together we where all very close) at the age of 15 from complications caused by his cancer. It has been 11 years since and I hate to say this but I do not think his parents will ever be over it. Although they have lived on and love their Grandkids, it has changed them into people we don't always know. My aunt was raised by a Pastor and his wife (adopted)and had what we all thought was a very strong faith. She will not go to church at all, and has not been able to find any belief that helps her grief. She searches online and has tried everything from rakhi to planetary awareness (I was lost as to what that actually was so if you know try to explain it..lol) We have always let her know that we are there for her. We show up when she wants to celebrate his birthday by going out to dinner or wants to do a cancer walk. It is not so much what you say but your actions. If you say I will be there but don't go to that rally or dinner it is known by the surviving parent. I lost a baby to still birth and I know it just never goes away, I cannot comprehend having lost one of whom I got to live with and would have daily schedules and rituals with. Your friend is in my families prayers.

A dear friend of mine lost his little girl at the age of eight, in a car crash. The mother was no longer around, he was a single Dad. I didn't know him at the time it happened, but on what would have been her 16th birthday he took me to see where she was. She loved dolphins and she has a dolphin for her headstone. That was a painful day for him, among many others, I think. I see him with other peoples kids now and I know he must have been a great Dad.

I don't know how they cope. I've had a few friends that have lost their children. It is heartbreaking...a parent's worst nightmare. Their strength just amazes me. I don't know how they carry on but they do. As for words of encouragement...I really don't think there are any words that could ease that type of pain. Just be there to listen and console. Nothing you say is going to ease the pain. Their loss has to be one of the deepest of all. I can't even imagine and hope and pray that I never have to be in that position.

Its a terrible thing to happen to someone. I know about deaths my self as I lost father a very small age. Deaths can be very painful and there's nothing we can do about it. The only thing I think should be done is to stand by the person who has lost a loved one. Give them as much comfort and support as you can. Make them feel that there is someone beside them always. Encourage them to live on and accept the truth. Teach them new ways to find happiness again.

I have a son age 2 years old. I believe now he is center of all my happiness. This small life he was hospitalized 3 times. Every time i was with him at hospital, i can't sleep and can't concentrate to work. So, i do understand how much pain the parents have to bear for their rest of life when their child die and they have nothing to do. No words/ speech can relief their pain. Hope no parent have to bear the same. I also believe in heaven and can only pray for them.