did you often wish your lover would die?

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sometimes you think about this not because you're a terrible person but because you feel trapped, you think that there's no way out and you don't know how to get out of the trap. other women tells this because they remembered how painful living with this kind of man, because they are emotionally battered, physically abused, bruises from the constant verbal abuse and not only fantasized her husband dying, but other women often had suicidal thoughts. they are exhausted and drained and all i want to do is to get away, she said. sometimes women don't leave because of children, they knew that even if they left they would still be feel responsible. in their minds the only way out for them is wishing their lovers to die. the way to get out of the trapped is to let go of responsibility for others feelings and to have their own responsibility for what they feel and this is a huge challenge for a woman. taking care of themselves rather than caretaking their lover/husband left them feeling unbearably guilty and this was the caused of feeling so trapped. remember caretaking is a form of control rather than loving their husband, giving up themselves to get approval or avoid disapproval and women realize that husbands should responsible for their feelings.