Is the marriage worth saving?

Have you talk to your husband to see why his family is treating you that way. My feeling is that when a guy loves his wife he will not tolerate anyone disrespecting her. Also, there is no reason the kids should be treated badly. Talk to your husband and get his take on the situation and what he feels the next step should be.

There are countless couples who make it on their own sometimes because they have migrated to another country or the situation is such that interaction with family other than nucleus does not become feasible. You should be more concerned with your children and your husband and fortify that relationship, develop contacts with those who are at close proximity i.e. your neighhours, colleagues and ofcourse friends. Your spare time could be used for your own family and try and be as independent as possible. Distance makes the heart grow fonder. Keep a distance from your inlaws and they will surely miss you. Good Luck.

Is it just his family or is it your husband too? What kind of support are you getting from him? How is their neglect of the children affecting him? I think the answers to those questions would make it a lot easier to determine if the marriage is worth saving.

I went out with a man whose family made feel quite worthless, especially his mother so I can appreciate what you are going through. In our case he made a choice between me and his mother because, believe it or not, it came down to that; needless to say, he chose his mother... I am now married to another man and his family loves me and it took some getting used to; in-laws that were actually nice to me! How does your husband react when his family is less than civil towards you? What broke me and my ex up was also the fact that he never, ever stood up for me when it came to his family. My advice would be to talk to your husband and if he is prepared to help you in regards to his family you have some hope but if he refuses or ignores the problem you may have to think again. I hope you work this out and I wish you all the best.

They are so mean. My mom is like the situation as yours, my dad's parents even make a way just to separate my mom to my dad. but in the end my dad choose my mom and us than his parents that's why we live very far away from them because my dad knows that they can ruined my mothers life. i suggest that tell it to your husband, if he didnt believe you then i think its about time that you will return him to his family.

Just remember that you married the guy and not his family. This type of situation is very common especially if they're very close to each other, I think they just feel that you took your husband's attention away from them. Just accept it as it is, if you're in the same household or reside near your husband's family, it is best that you transfer to place farther away and limit your visit. Don't blame your marriage because of what's happening now, and don't let you husband choose between you and his family either, the mere fact that he's very supportive is enough reason that you should make the marriage work. As you grow older, your in laws resentment towards you will disappear especially if you prove to them that you're willing to stick it with your husband no matter what. Remember that you have your own family now and it is your duty to make it work. Cheers!

Your complaints are directed to his family and not really to him so why are you asking if the marriage is worth saving? There will always be a time when in-laws won't warm up to you, it's not your obligation to make them like you. Just be civil enough and don't push yourself to be liked by them. The most important thing here is the partnership of you and your husband.

For me, for as long as your husband is by your side, loves you nevertheless, and provides you with the care and support you need, I think no in-laws can break such bond. It's not them whom you're living with but your husband. It would be unfair for him if he'd loves you despite his family's disapproval only to learn that you're not willing to fight for your relationship. My mom had a similar situation as you are in right now. Before, my aunts and uncles were indifferent from her and even with us. To avoid such feelings of hatred and hurt, we, our family except my dad because it's his family, chose to stay away. What would be the use of reaching out to them if they don't wanted to? We had this in mind ever since that incident happened and they never heard from us. The sad thing is, our dad did not supported my mom, never stood by her side and had always said that blood is thicker than water. We still feel the pain of such words but what can we do. We cannot force ourselves to someone who does not want us. Then came the time that they'd realize their missing my dad's family and had always requested our presence in every gathering held. My mom told us that we should go because they are our relatives and whatever we do, nothing can change that fact. Now we're communicating with them in the most civil way we can. We don't want to continue begging for their affection. We we're somehow trained to maintain self respect. I hope you've learned from what I had imparted to you. I'd say it again, if your husband is with you through all this, then you're lucky. We've gone through it without the support of my dad and we did survive. You can as well.

hi there, i do not know what tips i can give to you. as your parents in law does not warm up to you and you have did something to win their love, so you have to ask yourself a question that have you did every effor you can to wim their welcome? the way you acted was wrong? if not, i think you can move out, far away from his families, to have your happy family with your kids.

if u love ur husband n he loves u why care about others live ur life.don't put other stuffs affect ur life

do your husband live together with his family? a man sometimes have to consider lots of things .if you are not happy with his family ,you and your husband can rent a house outside.

From reading the other responses in this post, absolutely girl.. fight for your marriage!!! As long as your husband is in your corner and defends you and respects you, then stay with him!! Ultimately you are not married to the other members of the family. I realize it would make for a much more comfortable situation, but it sounds like the love is there between the 2 of you. Persevere through this! Stay strong and love will conquer the situation! God Bless.

yes it does

Hey dear! That is a bad situation. You just have to think if you really love your husband. And I guess you do, if you already did those things to get along with his family. If you do, then why should you break such a relationship? To regret it later? You should try this.. just go to them, to his parents, and have a threesome discussion. Ask them why they can't accept you, what should you do so that they will stop acting like jackasses. If this won't work, and they simply don't accept you for no reason, just stop thinking about it. You shoul concentrate on the mariage and don't care about them anymore.

The question is, do you love your husband? If the answer is yes, stay married. You must talk this out with him. Good luck dear.

Family, especially in-laws, can cause a great deal of problems in a marriage as your has. However I think that as long as your spouse is on your side and let's his family know that you come first there should be no reason to walk away. If however he does not defend you or try to straighten them out and especially if he gives you the feeling he may cannot stand up to them it may be a time to seriously consider leaving. This would assume that you have had a nice long talk with him about how you feel and nothing was resolved. From my perspective, your spouse always comes first. I was married to a woman that my family was fairly cool to. Part of it was because she felt so uncomfortable with then that we spent very little time with them before she would want to leave. Regardless, she came first and I tried my best to be the go between. Not an easy place to be. The question to ask yourself is where is my husband on this and do I come first? If you can answer yes to that you need to sit down and work this out with him. He must help you understand where the problem is so that perhaps it can be worked out. I wish you well.

The big question is how does your husband feel about how they treat you. has he spoken to you about it and spoke to his family. If he treats you right and is happy with you then, your marriage is worth saving. You don't live with these people and I hope you have your own family and friends to lean. Forget them.

My cousin went through a lot before he is married to his wife. The grandmother of his wife would never agree they got married as she looked down on my cousin. He was never welcome when she was around and he had tried many times to win her blessings to marry her granddaughter. However, the mother was very supportive and approved of their marriage. When they got married, the grandmother has decided to break all connections with the granddaughter. She was devastated, but she has made a decision to stick with her husband no matter what and hope that one day her grandmother will open her heart to accept them. I am sorry to hear about your situation, but if we look deeper, your husband is a victim here, just like my cousin's wife above except that he's not being forced to choose between you and his family. If your relationship with your husband isn't the main problem, your marriage does worth saving. The real problem is his family, so, just keep away from them to avoid anymore hard feelings. God bless!

From reading all the posts here, I would have to agree with everyone and put both your feet down. That means give them a choice, they change their attitudes and disrespect or they have no relationship with any of you. But that also means your husband will not have much of a relationship with his family. If he treats you well and loves both you and your kids than I believe that the marriage is worth saving. But the relationshp with his family is not. Have they always treated him this way too? What about his siblings? Have you discovered why this is happening? Do they think your husband married the wrong person or what? But it sounds like you are a rational and mature person so I don't know why they wouldn't like you. This is my philosophy: Life is a period of time, and any person, place or thing that wastes time and makes you not cherish life is not worth your time. So cherish your husband and family and try to have as little contact with his family as you can.

I think, if you have done any thing to reach them, don't spent your time again for do it. You must have a principle that you can do many thing without them, you can work, your life goes on and they can influence your life. As long as your behave didn't hurt them. Don't hurt them, do a good things to them and God knows it. Be strong. You are a strong woman, that can do many thing without their support. Go away..