Have you ever been sad, then mad, then sad again?
By bonnie
@bunnybon7 (50973)
Holiday, Florida
November 8, 2009 1:44pm CST
well, shes done it again and im not going to ever deal with her EVER again this time. im soooooo stupid
through the weeks since Agra, sons ex gf, has moved out she has tried appealing to my soft heart. Im one of those people thats so soft hearted im a "hazard to myself" (as the song goes) my newest song on my playlist here. its called "Dont let me get me" by Pink. Agra talked me into talking son into letting her come over and visit. she kept calling and crying on the phone to me how shes lost her Love, my son, her dog, Lucy, and her friend. me.
so, i said ok, we can hang out, as my son is also very soft hearted and has tried to make this transition of her move as easy as possible. but this Witch from #ell is trying to make it as painful on everyone else as possible. im so mad at myself. why do I let people get it over on me.??? When she left she picked up Lucy and all her doggy things. shes never paid hardly any attention to this dog. she knew it would tear our heart out if she took her but my son said, cant do anything about it mom, its her dog. said he'd bought it for her birthday 6 yrs ago. Im not only sad for Lucy, which will be left alone when she goes to work and such but her and Coco was so used to each other. im sad for son because Lucy loves son more then any of us. then I was also attached to the dog. cry. I mean here is a woman that was looking online at expensive pekingese before she left, saying she wouldnt take her if she could get son to BUY!!! her another one! how freaking cold is that? i wouldnt give up coco if someone said they'd buy me a new dog. gggrrr!! so, i had to change my avatar again. cant stand to look without crying. Im having no more to do with her. this is it. the straw that broke this camels back. sorry this is so long and so sad. just had to vent to my friends here.7 people like this
20 responses
@celticeagle (168570)
• Boise, Idaho
8 Nov 09
It is sad. Animals can mean so much to us. Being a hazard to yourself doesn't hurt anyone usually but yourself and until you are stronger and able to stand firm on things your life will be ridden with just such things as you have told us about today. My daughter is some what like this too. She is getting better and stronger but it has taken many years to get here. Venting is healthy if done in this way. Good luck to you and all involved.
@celticeagle (168570)
• Boise, Idaho
9 Nov 09
Yes, too nice can actually do damage. It makes a person seem almost naive.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
9 Nov 09
well i do hope your daughter soon gets a thicker skin and hope i do to. its not good to be to nice these days i think.2 people like this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
8 Nov 09
I hope u have learned your lesson w/this woman this time, bon. She was so mean to u when she was living there u knoe people don't change their ways & attitudes, I;m so sorry this has happened but let the devil be gone this time, if she calls hang up & don't talk to her. She is a hurtful , spiteful person to take that dog & she knew it would hurt u & your son. Good ridance to bad rubbish.
1 person likes this
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
8 Nov 09
thanks girl. your a good friend. i so wish i lived near you. like i said i get so mad at myself for being so stupidly soft on people. anyway, i guess this is pretty much it. problem being now is i have no one here but my son.
maybe i'll get to feeling well enough to get out and make friends.2 people like this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
8 Nov 09
I wish u lived close to. I could use a friend right now close by. I hope u will stay the hell away from her in every way. she is no good. I hope u get to feeling better, bon.
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
11 Nov 09
Oh bunny, what a terrible thing to happen. What sort of person would do that to people she reckons she cares about and to a poor little dog whose home is with you guys? She is such a dirty rat. You must be feeling so bad but you shouldn't blame yourself. What is likely to happen to the poor little guy? What if you ring her up constantly and ask about how the doggy is? Would that annoy her? She did it to you...turn the tables and do it back to her.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
12 Nov 09
no im a little afraid of trying that. we would likely argue and if not then she might figure something to say to get back in here. She still has some of her stuff here but i told son she should make an appointment to get it.
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
9 Nov 09
Oh, poor Lucy!! I hope your son will be checking on her in some way. Maybe you can talk a friend into dognapping her and turning her into the animal shelter then you can legally adopt her?
By the time I was 40 I learned to stop letting people use me for a doormat. Well, almost. But now I'm 55 and nobody walks on me. I think I've hardened my heart to protect myself. You have to learn to do the same. Thinking of yourself is NOT selfish--those that love you want you to be happy and by NOT giving in to people like your son's ex you are doing good to yourself and your family.
I hope Lucy is okay and that you somehow get her back.
1 person likes this
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
9 Nov 09
i sure do wish so also. i do hope we can figure something out and she dont come up with some other scheme to make us miserable. im starting to think she is being revengeful over the split obviously.
@tamarafireheart (15384)
•
9 Nov 09
Hi bunnybon,
I cannot believe how heartless somee people be, what in the world your son ever saw in her, she is very bad for doing that, she is not thinking of the feeling the poor dog had for your son, she is thinking of herself and she done that through spite, no doubt she will ill treat the dog.
Tamara
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
9 Nov 09
i know she wont give her the loving attention we did. for she never did when she lived here. lucy mostly hung out around me and coco and my son. yes she just thinks of herself.
@catdla1 (6005)
• United States
8 Nov 09
Hi Bunny! I can't believe what she did to you! It's hard to even come up with 'postable' sentiments about her, other than that she spells her name incorrectly. It should be correctly spelled, 'AARG!' because that seems to
be how she makes everyone who knows her think. Why else would she not have
other friends in her life? I hope that you and your GOOD LOOKING son will
maintain your wonderful soft hearts, and sever her from your lives to help
keep them that way.
If you both refuse her phone calls and don't let her visit, when she gets
desperate enough she will probably offer to give Lucy back. She sounds like
she only values things and people for how she can use them. Coco could
probably use some extra pampering and that would be good for all of you.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
8 Nov 09
well my son has said the same thing about her bringing Lucy back. he said she will soon find out its to much work and concern for her. but im more likely to worry over her not caring and not taking Lucy out for walks,etc. here she has a doggy door and was very happy to run back and forth through the house with coco. there she will have to wait and i never thought that was good for a dog. yes, coco is getting extra attention. but its so sad that she keeps going to the door now and then waiting for lucy to come back through it so, iam torn between keeping in touch in hopes she will bring her back or just cutting off any communication with her
so, iam torn between keeping in touch in hopes she will bring her back or just cutting off any communication with her1 person likes this
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
9 Nov 09
well son says that here in AZ if she were to call the cops to get her dog back, they always take the womans side and is not to nice when dealing with men. also, somehow when she moved, of course she ended up with lucy's papers
1 person likes this
@catdla1 (6005)
• United States
8 Nov 09
Perception is everything. If you maintain contact AARG will take full advantage, using Lucy as a pawn. If you break contact, she will realize that she's gone too far. She is more likely to offer Lucy as a 'peace' prize. If that does happen and you accept Lucy and (unfortunately) her back into your lives, get the transfer of ownership of Lucy in writing. She can be tough...you can be tougher.
1 person likes this
@mtdewgurl74 (18151)
• United States
12 Nov 09
That's okay I am sure alot of us have probably dealt with a situation such as that at one time in our lives or another and it is good to get it out and have someone to talk to about it. I am sorry you all just couldn't keep Lucy but I would take a guess she took it just because she knew it would hurt you both alot. To have some leverage maybe. But I do hope that things go okay and no more problems arise and hoping she leaves you guys alone.. it is us softies that always give in..but after a few pokes at a festering sore we do tend to get riles up just like everyone else.. and that is what the relationship with this woman is a festering sore..and it won't heal if you keep letting her come around and poking at it..
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
13 Nov 09
yes you are sure right. she tried to talk to me today on the phone and i just told her outright i no longer want to be friends because im tired of getting hurt and im not putting myself or my little dogs feelings out there any more.
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
10 Nov 09
Sounds like a real class act (NOT). You are your son are no doubt well rid of her. Sorry about the dog though. :-(
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
12 Nov 09
yes i should have never came and gotten attached to the dog
@Maggiepie (7816)
• United States
9 Nov 09
[b]Bunny, after reading other posts here, I was reminded of something I've done a few times. When I KNOW someone is mistreating an animal, I'll take it. Period. Consequences be damned.
Once, for example, knowing a room-mate I had at the time was neglecting a pet, I took "Haiku," the roomie's beautiful, funny, smart, affectionate red-haired Setter/Lab mix & gave her to a family from out of town, who loved her. Why? Because on one of the stormiest nights I've ever experienced, with lightening striking all around, even blowing fuse boxes, roomie was out getting plastered & had left Haiku on a metal lead in the yard, & she was mindless with terror. I was scared, too, but I just crossed myself, said a quick, heartfelt prayer, & rushed out into it & untwisted her chain, whereupon she bolted! Zoom! Gone!
When roomie finally dragged in (the next morning...
), I lied like someone housing a Jew in Nazi Germany, & told him Haiku had run away. True, technically, but I knew he wouldn't realize who'd let her loose. I found her at the pound later, bailed her out, & searched for that couple who adopted her.
God will hold me accountable for the theft & the lie, but I'll take His punishment, because He is just & merciful, & He has the right; He made me, after all! 
But if you have the means to get Lucy, be brave, for her sake, & do it, & find her a safe home if you can't hide her from her legal owner, her abuser, "ARRGH." (Love that name! ) You'll sleep better at night, I promise you!
Maggiepie
IMPEACH THE IMPOSTER![/b]
), I lied like someone housing a Jew in Nazi Germany, & told him Haiku had run away. True, technically, but I knew he wouldn't realize who'd let her loose. I found her at the pound later, bailed her out, & searched for that couple who adopted her.
God will hold me accountable for the theft & the lie, but I'll take His punishment, because He is just & merciful, & He has the right; He made me, after all!
But if you have the means to get Lucy, be brave, for her sake, & do it, & find her a safe home if you can't hide her from her legal owner, her abuser, "ARRGH." (Love that name! ) You'll sleep better at night, I promise you!
Maggiepie
IMPEACH THE IMPOSTER![/b]@Maggiepie (7816)
• United States
11 Nov 09
[b]But neglect is a form of abuse!
I once knew 2 brothers who kept a dog locked in their bathroom all day when they went to work, so she got no love or attention, or even exercise. Of course she was forced to go on the floor, & then live in that filth. I threatened to take their dog if they didn't do better.
I hope they treated her better...it was years ago, & I can't remember the outcome. I feel pretty sure I would've taken her had they not, though. I'd already 'napped several abused pets by that time, after all!
Maggiepie
IMPEACH THE IMPOSTER![/b]
Maggiepie
IMPEACH THE IMPOSTER![/b]@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 Nov 09
im not even sure where shes staying now. i dont think she will actually abuse her except for leaving her alone some and not paying as much attention to her as she should.
1 person likes this
@Maggiepie (7816)
• United States
9 Nov 09
[b]Sorry to hear about the dog. That is a shame. Pray that Heaven looks after it.
You're well rid of her. Learn from your mistake of trusting her, & don't allow her to step on your kind heart again! 
I firmly believe there's a special circle of Helll reserved for such heartless people.
God be with you, dear.
Maggiepie
IMPEACH THE IMPOSTER![/b]
I firmly believe there's a special circle of Helll reserved for such heartless people.
God be with you, dear.
Maggiepie
IMPEACH THE IMPOSTER![/b]@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 Nov 09
thanks maggiepie, i hope you are right about where she should go. the only thing is that as time goes by i find myself more and more hard hearted toward her and am most days praying i wont be.
1 person likes this
@Maggiepie (7816)
• United States
11 Nov 09
[b]Actually, I'm hoping just the opposite, as it would mean that not only would her soul have been saved--a priceless thing--but she wouldn't be making others miserable any longer, either!
Let's hear it for repentance & reformation!
Maggiepie
IMPEACH THE IMPOSTER![/b]
Maggiepie
IMPEACH THE IMPOSTER![/b]
@Opal26 (17679)
• United States
9 Nov 09
Hey bunny~ I'm so sorry that you fell for this miserable beotch's
sh!t once again! That is so not fair! How could you and your
son let her take that poor sweet dog who will probably be as
miserable as you, your son and Coco are! She is the most selfish,
mean miserable person on this earth and I hope she rots in Hell!
I hope that you and your son have learned not to ever deal with
her bullsh!t ever again an if she does call to HANG THE HELL UP
ON HER! I would have your son try to get the dog back and tell
her that it isn't fair to Coco or Lucy to separate them and that
he made a terrible mistake! Why should Coco and Lucy be punished
because this woman is a miserable person! I feel so bad for you
bunny! I hate when I let people take advantage of MY GOOD SIDE
too! I really do know exactly how terrible you feel! I am here
for you my friend! Like I said, I would tell your son to go back
to her and try to make her feel like sh1t and get Lucy back!
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 Nov 09
yes i wish it were that easy, but he said she has the papers and lucy is hers. believe me im really done this time. i know i said it before but i have no sympathy left. she dosent care if everyone is miserable as long as she has her way. my son says its just another way of trying to get him to keep in contact with her because all she really wants is him.
@rosepedal64 (4188)
• United States
8 Nov 09
Hi bunnybon
I kinda know what you are feeling. A little different story though. My son was in jail and is working hard to get his life back. He has girlfriend who have a child together. They had been together for over 5 years. She started not going to see him,stopped writing letters, and then didn't get the phone fixed to where he could call her. Then one day I found out that she was seeing an guy and hadn't told my son at all. She is the devil herself. It hurt him so bad and of course when a child of yours gets hurt we become mama bear. I was so mad and hurt at the same time.
I know that your sons girlfriend took Lucy because she knows that it would hurt him and you too. You differently need to wash your hands of her. Be careful she will try to smooth things over and try to work her way back into your life.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
8 Nov 09
yes that is what she has always done since the 14yrs i've known her. when she met and wooed my son into living with her 6 yrs ago, i was quite upset and told them it probably wouldnt work out. many times since then shes "slithered" her nasty self back into my life cause she knows how to get to my soft heart. but this woman is cold is all i can say and i hope/pretty sure i've finally learned my lesson with her so, is your son still in jail? yes, its very hard for them. my youngest has had that experience with his gf. they have 2 babies together now and im hoping its going to work out as it seems it will. hope your son gets back on track to, but its really hard when they are so crazy about a girl that doesnt treat them right.
so, is your son still in jail? yes, its very hard for them. my youngest has had that experience with his gf. they have 2 babies together now and im hoping its going to work out as it seems it will. hope your son gets back on track to, but its really hard when they are so crazy about a girl that doesnt treat them right.1 person likes this
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
9 Nov 09
She definitely did that with Lucy out of spite, and that would be one of the situations where my moods would wildly fluctuate. Do people not realize that not only is she hurting your son and yourself, she is also hurting the dog. Dogs are pack animals and now she has been taken away from her pack. Lucy is going to go through depression just like you are. I don't know if it is a possiblity, but I certainly hope that Agra comes to her senses and brings Lucy back to where she belongs.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
11 Nov 09
you are wise. i didnt know exactly how to put it like you did but thats what i felt. these 2 dogs, mine and hers are used to each others company and now she is putting them both into depression and theres not i can do about it.
@rg0205 (2636)
• Hong Kong
9 Nov 09
I think we've all felt the same things you have at some point. We just have different ways of handling our emotions. Sounds like you're doing pretty well so far in spite of all the stress that's around you with what I've just read.
That woman sounds very manipulative. Is she perhaps psychologically disturbed? I think its best to keep clear of her. She doesn't sound like a very nice person to begin with.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
11 Nov 09
yes you are absolutely right and its to bad all of us lost so much while learning that nothing ever changes with her.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 Nov 09
sometimes i wonder about that. altho my son says she is never happy anyway. i wonder how this has worked out for her. i try to keep myself from really wishing the worst for her.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
9 Nov 09
hi bunnybon7 my she sounds really awful,to take back her dog after all this time and your son getting attached to Lucy and vice versa. I know it is her dog but she showed how much she really cared when she asked your son to buy her a pekingese.wow.I
am glad you came to us, friends do help friends here. I have never
been in a situation quite like that but I can see how she knows just what buttons to push with you and your son. As she is an ex she sure expects a lot from you too,because I am sure there is a
good reason she is an ex. I am proud of you bunnybon for sticking up for yourself finally. If she had any guts she would say keep the dog as it has gotten attached to you two,but she doesn't evidently.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 Nov 09
thats true. all shes ever thought of is herself. shes a fat stingey pig and until i came back here to AZ, my son didnt see it or else he put up with it since he didnt have anyone here and she made sure of that to. that he didnt have friends. it was just like when a man takes over a womans life. only this was the other way around. its eating her up that hes finally able to get her away from him.
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
9 Nov 09
This is incredibly sad. I honwstly wonder how someone can be so mean and spiteful. I am so sorry that this has happened to you and I hope that your son won't take her back.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 Nov 09
oh hes not ever taking her back. he assures me even if she gives the dog back. this was actually one of the few things she had on her side was the dog being here. now all she has is some of her junk we have no use for is here. but she will have to make an appointment to get it.
@Joseph_Ryuki (90)
• Philippines
9 Nov 09
yes, I have been when I was during in my high school years of my life.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 Nov 09
yes most of us have a bad time in high school. so true. i should remember that that passed also as this will.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 Nov 09
yes when you are first new here you just enjoy reading some of the problems people have and try to help. but some time soon you begin to ask also. most people want to help and they do by just sympathizing and some give helpful advice. thanks for caring anyway.
@zhouzhouing (5)
• China
9 Nov 09
Yes ,this station is usually appear in my live.I often feel sad when I fail to do something .But I think it is nothing to my live,then I become happy.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 Nov 09
its hard to keep from my mind but its getting a little easier now.
