Help... My kid is FAILING.....
By fairyprinces
@fairyprinces (93)
Maldives
November 10, 2009 2:51pm CST
Hi All..
Need all the advice I can get...
Today was final reports giving and my kid has to resit exam. She failed in 3 subjects and this is a first. Her marks are not reaching the passing mark by 3 to 7 points but still its failing.
She is quite bright but ever since as a child it has been difficult to make her sit and study. In Gr2 after crying for 1 hour due to a bit of a struggle between us for 2 hours of cracking books we came to a deal that if she keeps gets good grades min A-, she don't have to have a study schedule. Was quite scared at the time but after reading few articles on the net I thought I will keep my side of the deal as long as she keeps hers.
Now she is in gr 8 and this is the first time she would be failing, that is if she fail the resit exam. This year in the first semester her marks were pretty bad and and went to B- and on the second semester she managed A- and so the finals got affected pretty bad I guess.
I think she will manage to pass the resit, am quite confident but I don't think I can keep my promise as now its high time she needs to give more time and effort to her studies.
Please tell the best way to tackle this problem and how to go about it. What will be the best approach????
1 person likes this
4 responses
@sleepylittlerose (1648)
• United States
10 Nov 09
Your deal was that if she made an A- she did not have to have a study schedule; was there any other deals made along with this? If not, her failure to perform should result in taking away things that she likes. I know that when my two boys did wrong the first thing that went was their cell phones. Try something that she would be upset if taken away, I bet her habits will change after she has lost it once or twice.
1 person likes this
@fairyprinces (93)
• Maldives
10 Nov 09
I only deal was I would not make her sit and study if she keeps her part of the deal. Had along chat and she cried a lot which made me bit guilty as I am a single parent and a part of me is always guilty that she is missing a father. I am afraid that somehow I have made her pretty guilty for failing. Could this be bad or can it have a negative impact???
Her dad does not play any part in our life so I am a working mother and have to spend hours or a day or two quite often.
I have already denied internet excess till her resit exam than again being an only child and sometimes I feel she is pretty lonely. Not much activities around here and I don't want too many restrictions make her life too dull. I am afraid that it could hurt her in someway.
@sleepylittlerose (1648)
• United States
11 Nov 09
your daughter will be ok. She will quickly learn what you expect of her and what she has to do to meet your expectations. My two boys went through the same thing your daughter is doing right now. The oldest one is now in college and the youngest is in high school and playing baseball. Kids will test your limits to see how you respond.
As for the crying she is trying to make you feel sorry for her. She figures that if you feel sorry for her you will give in and give her what she wants. Stand strong and don't worry. I am sure you are doing a great job as a parent.
@fairyprinces (93)
• Maldives
12 Nov 09
Shes bright but she doesn't like reading a lot. She's the type of student who observes a lot in class.
She was doing pretty good till now. Never failed a subject infect usually gets A+ in almost all subjects. Few times she got bit low in one or two subjects. Also for her she has to like the teacher, if she likes the teacher she is among the top. If she don't like the teacher to motivate her is really an issue. I am bit scared about this fact. Sometimes i wonder if i future when she is in higher studies and if she had a teacher she don't like how will she do..
Honestly speaking being a mother is a wonderful thing but some issues scare the hell out of you...
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
12 Nov 09
hi fairyprinces it sounds to me like she is bored with her s chool work and I am
wondering if you have had her IQ tested.my son was haveing a horrible time in the first and second grade and we found he was bored stiff.he was acting out and not doing his work, getting bad grades yet he was really super intelligent.we found that when we put him in a gifted kids program he did a work all the time as he was working at his grade level not below it. her marks were pretty bad and went to bminus then she is very bright and just needs the right kind of schooling.n She should be tested for gifted kids as you just might be surprised.
@fairyprinces (93)
• Maldives
12 Nov 09
I haven't done an IQ test. I really don't think she has any problems. U see I was a teacher myself for 12 years and have a diploma. I would have noticed if there is a special need problem. You can be right that she is not motivated enough. Her marks are not that bad. Pass percentage is 60 and she is falling behind 4 or 6 percentage in three subjects.
I will take your advice and do and IQ test. Thanks for sharing.
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
10 Nov 09
I'd just tell her straight out that she didn't keep her grades up and so she needs to be put on a schedule until they come back up. And then enforce it...
