Do you like being compared with your brother or sister?

No I do not like being compared to my sister. She is so different than me that I actually think it is an insult that anyone would be comparing me to her as a matter of fact. So no, do not like it at all.

I don't like being compared with my sisters completely and I guess most people will feel uneasy when they are being compared with others. If one has no interests in study, I don't think he/she can be motivated after he/she is compared with others. On the contrary, there may be some disadvantages of the comparision. Comparison is odious. It can lead to nothing but keen competition and coldness. Unfortunately, most parents and teachers like to compare some children with others, which is really a boring thing.

I do not agree with that sort of thing as every Child is different and she should not compare him to his Brother as that will also start causing Ill Feelings between the 2 You never have 2 Children the same and she needs to accept that She will also give the Boy a Complex as he will believe he is stupid which he is not he is just not as bright as the other which is normal

Well i do not like people comparing me to ANYONE, it's annoying and i find it very disrespectful. As far as getting compared to a family member, I do have two older brothers who share most of the same interest so they are kind of like my twins. We also have the same strength school-wise and the only thing they could differentiate is our sport option. So everything is cool with me when they compare me with my brothers. In your situation, I think that the mother only wants the best for her child that's why she's doing it. Although there could be other ways to motivate the child.

of course i don't want to be compared to any one specially to my family. that will destroy my self worth and my self-esteem. i think i wanted to be accepted for what and who i am . even i don't excel at things while other people do, i think that i don't want people mentioning to my face what other has accomplished . i think that people should not give pressure to other people comparing their abilities and accomplishments.

I'm an older sibling and I know it really annoys my younger borther to be compared to me. He gets very upset when teachers at my old high schol say to him "why can't you be more like your sister?". I guess living in someones shadow could be difficult and I try to help him. I'm a very studious person and I guess he just isn't like that so we try to help him distinguish himself in other ways. For example hes very sporty and I was but he tries to do better in sports that hes great at he knows that I was always a good dancer and a good runner but hes a great soccer player (or football as we call it in the UK!!) and he's a great runner too so I try to get him to do better than me in iot and it's great motivation for him :) Although he gets motivation from sporty things like that when someone compares him to me in an academic sense it just de-motivates him. He tends to take the attiude of "i'll never beat my sister so what's the poin in trying?" Which really upsets me because he's really good at things like art, drama and geogrpahy but he's not a good writer or speller. He just tends to give up. I spoke to one of my teachers ex-high school teachers about it and they said that they didn't realise that they were doing it and told me that they used to egt compared to their siblings and hated it so they'd stop but it frsutrates me that he should have to have me a a banchmark because (I'm not being big headed here!) it's pretty hard shadow to try and get out of academically speaking. I feel really bad for putting him under such pressure :(

Every person in this world is unique and comparing one with another is not good. I don't like to be compared with my sister or brother. Each one has their best quality and comparison only creates a rivalry betwen the siblings.

It is wrong comparing people with others cause it cause feelings of inferiority and superiority among them and ultimately hatred. The woman should stop comparing her son to his brother and find other ways to encourage his son to work harder in his studies

yes there are positive effects and negative effect when your child comparing to older child.one positive side is that it will boost him to study very well if his brother help him out to his assignment and being on supportive side.the negative is comparing oftentimes is not good for once competition heightened.and sibling rivalries heightened too.guidance of the parents is a must.

I HATE that. I don't do that. I don't pick at someone's weakness by comparing him to another person they know. It becomes more personal that way. I don't believe you can encourage a child by comparing him to his sibling. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. I would encourage the child in other ways, like pointing out his strengths and going along the lines: "You're good at ____. If you're good at that, then I think if you put your mind to this thing you're having a hard time with, then you can do a lot better." Comparing a boy to his brother can also put a dent in his self esteem. It could also make him feel envious toward the better doing sibling. I wouldn't do it.

I don't want to be compared with my siblings. It's not a good motivation. This also lead to a sibling rivalry. This is happening to our family. My mother loves to compare us with my sister and brother. It could degrade your self-esteem as a person. Even if we are siblings, but we have different capacities and capabilities as a person.

Hi,caregarden..I do not compare others with anyone and more importantly i do not entertain others to compare me with anybody.Everyone is unique in their own way.It is not that those who score well in studies are intelligent or vice versa.May be the intention of that mother is good as she wants her younger son to do well in studies like her older son,but for that she can make him understand the importance of studies and help him in studying his syllabus with some techniques rather than comparing with older son.Since her son is young he may not get the actual view of his mother and may mistake her for being partial and may feel neglected because of his poor performance in studies.And he may prefer to stay alone over the days and this will drastically affect his social life as well.

In my opinion I don't like being compared with my siblings. I believe that each individual is unique. If someone wants to motivate me, he/she must use another way (like: offering rewards, explanation, etc.) to do that rather than comparing me to another person. Comparison would just lower my self esteem.

I don't like to be compare with others, I think giving appreciations will be much better motivation than comparing one self with another.. :) Hi careguarden :)

I don't like to be compared with my brother or sister. I think everyone has his or her own personalities. We were born with our respective advantages and disadvantages. A person may not be good at study, but he may be good at doing other things, such as drawing, singing, designing, etc. We can require everybody to be good at study. Take my family for example, my two sisters are not good at study, but they are good at knit and they make full use of their advantages and now make a decent living. My brother is not good at study either, but he's quite skillful at management. Now, he's working in a company as a manager. As for me, I'm the only child in my family who is good at study. Since I'm not good at other things, I study hard and have just got my master's degree. Now, I work as a college teacher. I think if we compare a person's disadvantages to others' advantages, then that person will be good-for-nothing in our eyes. That's unfair. I'm lucky because my parents never compare me with my brother or sister. If they had done that, I would probably have been a very bad person now.

We are all individual and different in many ways but then their are always similarities between brothers and sister. I do not mine being compare to my siblings because I am sure that people compare them with me also.

I did not used to like being compared to my siblings, but it doesn't really bother me any more. There are definitely similarities between all of us, and they are not all good but they are not all bad, either. I think that it is usually more of a compliment to be compared to them than it is an insult. Besides, then I can blame them for some of my bad habits, because I do act like them.

Hi careguarden, I think why some parents do the comparison thing is to try and foster some healthy competition. Your siblings and yourself are vying for your parents attention and kids generally want positive attention lavished on them. So when a mom says something like, "look at your older brother he does so well, do you think you could do better? I bet you can, why don't you show me etc", they are hoping that perhaps the kid will try harder so he can get the same praise. I was also always compared to my siblings and it does backfire. While I did develop a sense of competition to try to do better than my older brothers it also played havoc on my self-esteem within the family, always feeling like I didn't measure up to their expectations. But outside the family, I feel confident and nowadays I am at peace with who I am but inside the family, I still sometimes get that familiar feeling of not being "as good, as smart, etc". So, its a tough line to draw, sometimes it will motivate and other times it will go the opposite direction like, "Well, if I can't measure up to my brother, why bother at all?"