Potty Training

Potty training (for girls or boys) can only really begin when the child becomes aware of the need and can anticipate that 'something' is about to happen. Before that the control of bodily functions is involuntary. It varies quite a lot from child to child but since all of us begin to have an awareness of our bodily functions (and, more importantly, that we can control them) from around a year onwards, this is the best time to begin potty training. At first it's very much an 'association'. As parents/adults it is not difficult to predict when a child (or pet) will automatically feel the need to defecate or pee. By nature, it is usually a few minutes after they have eaten or drunk something and catching that 'moment' and sitting them on the potty (when they are able) constitutes the first steps. Very early on they can begin to learn to associate the process of sitting on the potty with the bodily function that is appropriate. It takes rather longer for them to be able to control the muscles so that they can wait and it's much better to take it slowly by encouragement and by making them aware that it's not really comfortable to be wet or messy. To tell a child that it is 'naughty' or 'bad' to wet or mess themselves - or even to suggest that it's inconvenient - is often the most common cause of 'accidents' long after the child should have learnt control: the control itself (and the 'inappropriate' control, especially) sometimes becomes a way of gaining notice and even of 'getting back' at the parent! Encouragement of curiosity in their own bodies and approval and pleasure when they 'get it right' is the only way. Cats and dogs, I think, do this too (though they also train with cuffs, bites and growls) but a mother cat's approval is not so evident to us. Well, we are human - not cats or dogs - and we respond better (in the long run) to compliments and approval than to punishment and disapproval ... though the punishment method is quicker for both humans and pets.

I have tried everything I could think of! My daughter was 2 when she was potty trained and it was easy as pie. My son is nearly 4 1/2 and still won't work with the potty. I have tried rewarding him, letting him know it made mommy sad when he told me when he was done going in his pants instead of going to the potty, etc. What I have found to work, so far, is that I ask him every hour if he has to go peepee. Then 30 minutes after lunch, I set him on the potty for 20 minutes or so. I do the same thing after supper. It seems to be getting through. I have been doing it for two weeks and as soon as the 6 week deadline I gave myself is up, I'm going to stop doing it for him and see if has become routine where he just asks to go when he has to. Please let me know if you try it or if you get any other good ideas. Good Luck!