Friend Or Foe?
By lidiam84
@lidiam84 (151)
Netherlands
November 21, 2009 3:43pm CST
I used to have a friend which I have trusted lots of private and emotional stuff. She is actually the only person I used to consider a friend.
One day we got into a big discussion and it led that to release her anger, she went to someone else she considers a friend, but I don't consider her a friend. In fact we have relatives who are related to each other so I only used to say Hello to her and maybe some small conversations but never in great detail, because I didn't want her to go around and spread the word and it would eventually come to the ears of some of my relatives.
So my friend went to this girl which is her friend and she told her why she was angry at me and other stuffs too.
Now the problem really starts when you "trust" someone. I Trusted her and she trusted that other girl.
How I found out that the girl knew it all...
Which shows you how amazing God is and how NOTHING stays hidden!I found in my in-box an email from the Girl saying amazingly Horrible things about me. I started crying and couldn't control myself and so I called my friend and told her the email I just got. She was shocked and she said she did tell her those things because she was mad at me but she never thought she would start spreading the word.
It turned out that the girl originally wanted to send that email to her sister and MISTAKENLY send it to me. 2 hours after sending that email she send me an email saying she's sorry that that email had to come to my hands and that I had to read that. She said she didn't wanted to hurt me and she was sorry and all of this had to happen in order for her to have learned her lesson.
I never gave her an response to neither of her emails and you know what, she became even more irritant and mean. Every time I said something on facebook she would immediately say something back like "how pathetic" "stop bragging"... she kept posting some really negative things and when I finally got enough I told my friend. I just want you to know I am having enough with your friend. I ignored her email because I didn't wanted to start a discussion in fact I didn't want to hear from her again and she is making my life miserable. I just want her to stop and she even defended her by saying "yeah ur not sure she was saying it to you"... and I said "well it's a pretty big coincidence".
This Next weekend is my friends birthday. I don't know if I should go because her other friends will be there and I just don't know if I should grace her with my presence after she betrayed me by telling the world all my life.
What do you guys think? Do you think she sended the email on purpose to break my friend and I appart? Do you think I should or should not go to that party?
Let me know...
2 people like this
4 responses
@Apple3Cranberry (678)
• United States
1 Dec 09
I think you are jealous. I hate to say this. I would like to be friendly, but people do get jealous from time to time. It happens. They turn very mean. This happens. It's OK. If you will overcome, then you are strong! But I realize that people complain. You probably have some things you need to get in touch with. This is my theory anyway. You probably don't want to hear it, but it may help. But you might not want to be helped. This is fine. Get a new friend. One that is better. She sounds awful anyway. Stick up for yourself. You are loved. How can you say stop bragging to someone? I know people brag. It brings pain, but if you look, you will see a yearning person. You will see a true person. And a person in pain. I guess people want to share their pain. Find how you can help yourself. If you are in pain. Don't worry. Be creative, because if you aren't you won't figure anything out. Go for it. Then you might even make her want to be friends with you, or she may become jealous of you, and you will see that you are of worth. These emotions are bad. Don't worry.
@lidiam84 (151)
• Netherlands
1 Dec 09
I'm sorry but are you 1. looking for responses on mylot just to earn more money and that's why you put angry comments? (if so, please don't waste my time) or 2. you didn't read my story all in detail. Because I didn't say to her that she was bragging. That is what she told me right after I commented about something nice on facebook (that didn't exactly consern her)that had happened to me. I'm not going to explain it because I wrote it pretty detailed on the story so I don't think I need to explain myself. And jealousy? waw! yeah I am pretty Jealous of people who called me names and you tell them personal stuff to and then you have to painfully be informed how they told other people. Yeah I am deffinitly Jealous!!
Ps: my third guess is that maybe ur high? But I guess maybe stupid could also be your case.
@jewels49 (1776)
• United States
30 Nov 09
I think you are being generous using the term friend for this person. A friend doesn't divulge confidences, in anger or otherwise. I think you should avoid the party, for your own comfort and because attending will send a message that the betrayal wasn't that big a deal and that you are a little desperate for friendship.
Chalk this one up to a learning experience, know for sure who you share your secrets with next time, if you need to share them. Know that you desrve better treatment than what this person gave you and make some real friends.
@lidiam84 (151)
• Netherlands
1 Dec 09
I am going to give you a thumbs up for ur answer because your right, when ur a friend it doesn't matter how gossipy and HOT that news is if your friend tells you something then your mission would be to be a good friend, give advice and let it be.
Sadly I must say I got ur advice a little too late and I went to the party anyways. At some point I wanted to show her that I was bigger than her, and I mean my heart is bigger. That I can overcome certain pains because I wasn't affraid to show my face knowing that her other friend was going to be there. But yeah, I should have stayed home and show her how I totally am disappointed and am not desperate for friendship. I certainly deserve better friends. I would have never guessed it cuz trully she means well. But her problem is that she believes she can fix eveything. And she was trying to fix me and we got angry and she went to "release her stress of not being able to change me" to the other person whom to her and mine surprise are not trustworthy.
Thank you so much for your advice tho. I now what to do from now on. ;-)
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
22 Nov 09
Hi lidiam!
That friend of your fried does really sound like a nasty, sly piece of work and I think you should ignore them both from now on. They have caused you so much trouble.
We all have friends that we trust with certain information and we just have to hope that our sxectrets will remain with them. In this case I can see that you are alos worried for your friend becuase the person that she trusted is now betraying that trust too.
You ask if you should go to the party - I think not. You would be best to swipe both of these from your life, even the first one. If you go to the party you will not feel comfortable surely?
@lidiam84 (151)
• Netherlands
22 Nov 09
Thnx MsD! No, I will definitely not feel comfortable and it would be very awkward and I don't know what they would be capable of doing in public. I might just for the best stay away from this one.
Now that I remember that friend of mine never used to come to my parties either. So I don't think it'll be so horrible if I didn't went either.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
21 Nov 09
Lidiam Ithink that with friends like that you sure do
not need enemies. I think you should not go to a party
with people who like to play games with you and try to
hurt you. I would pick out some new friends who like you
for who you are, and will treat you the way you would
treat them. both of these friends do not sound very
friendly at all to me from what you said. You deserve
to be treated much better than that.
