Which do you think is more effective to lift the tense?

after a quarrel normally i will give a smile to reduce the tension and tension will will vanish from that place.normally i don't go into a big quarrel and will reduce it in the middle of the quarrel by giving a smile in the middle itself.i think a word of sorry will also reduce the tension and a hug ,kiss,and any of action will do.

Hello,zhuhuifen.Welcome to mylot.I agree with his views that words and act will be fine.I and my husband sometimes quarrel.But there is always fast and good.He would appologize to me or to give me a hug.I woulld to apologize to him too.

zhuhuifen46, Being sensitive would be the best order of the day. A compassion to first evolve ourself, casting aside our egos and anger will be the first step. For, how could the problem be resolved if either party is unwilling to give way. Only when we are sensitive, will we then know what to do and say and more importantly at the right time, so as to ease the tensions within and solve the problem at the end of the day. It is also important for one to maintain a positive attitude at all times. “I believe the single most significant decision I can make on a day-to-day basis is my choice of attitude. It is more important than my past, my education, my bankroll, my successes or failures, fame or pain, what other people think of me or say about me, my circumstances, or my position. Attitude keeps me going or cripples my progress. It alone fuels my fire or assaults my hope. When my attitudes are right, there is no barrier too high, no valley too deep, no dream too extreme, no challenge too great for me.” Charles R. Swindoll

hi,zhuhuifen! both the words and acts are good ways to clear the bad air,I think. probably using the two togehter is the best.:) I believe anyone who receives a cup of hot coffee going with some sweet words cannot resist showing his or her smile. have a nice day!