Politically correct - mylot style. (light-hearted)

United States
November 28, 2009 11:09am CST
I think I figured out what it takes to get voted number one in the politics category. 1. Be overtly and obsessively (yet hypocritly) christian. 2. Say witty things like, "Global Warming is a Farce." or "Palin is selling books." 3. Support your second amendment. 4. Reserve three bullets (protected by number 3). One is for a gay man, and the other two are for his lover. You must never refer to them as "boyfriends", as they are not entitled to share in the same love as we share in. Lesbians get a pass, but very important: ONLY lipstick lesbians. Any lesbian with a more masculine appearance will be shot as well. 5. Create a parody thread, using only the most arrogant statments, that the rightists will consider them true. And your rating will increase. (I'm hoping this thread works for me.) 6. Overuse the word "jihadist". Practice this offline, too. Anytime you see a muslim, or, anyone in a turban or burkha for that matter, you must always associate the word "jihadist" or "terrorist" with their image. Also, practice this for hasidic jews, too. 7. Abortion is wrong. Memorize that. Even in cases of rape and incest, abortion is not up to the woman carrying the fetus, but, it is your decision, even though the fetus is not viable on its own. You make it your business. 8. While voraciously protesting abortion, be sure to let 40,000 actually living people each year die out of want of medical care. You may only apply your prolife choices to fetuses and not living people, and certainly not livestock. 9. Pretend the last 8 years never happened, forget about Florida entirely, and blame everything on that Muslim usurper. That includes the wars, the economy, the unemployment, the terrorists, etc. Come up with really cool names like, "o-BUM-a", or "Hitler" when describing him. 10. MOST IMPORTANT: POST REALLY STUPID AND ACENINE SIGNATURES, BUT MAKE SURE THEY POINT TO SOMEONE YOU ARE ARGUING WITH.
7 people like this
12 responses
@anniepa (27955)
• United States
28 Nov 09
Excellent discussion! You could also add: 11. Accept no sources that aren't blatantly right-wing! Anything even slightly from the left is "hate-filled" by definition but the wackiest right-wing site is absolutely accurate and any attacks are justified! 12. If someone says something negative about one of your conservative heroes find an example or two where someone lied or exaggerated about that hero because that automatically makes anything else said about them also lies! Annie
3 people like this
• United States
28 Nov 09
Duly noted.
1 person likes this
• United States
28 Nov 09
The evil-doers.
1 person likes this
• Mexico
28 Nov 09
13. Think that everything it's about terrorism and how can we fight against terrorism. And think that we're winning the wars Bush have started
3 people like this
@MJay101 (710)
28 Nov 09
Well, who wants to be number one, anyway? (You forgot two further essentials: lack of sarcasm detector and total sense of humour bypass. Oh, and the vocabulary of an eight year old.)
3 people like this
• United States
28 Nov 09
Well, ooh. That is a tough one. Sarcasm, like "nuclear" is a polysyllabic word. I wanna be number one. OMG - Like on myspace - when you are in their top 8. I just want to be god and reign on mylot.
• United States
30 Nov 09
LOL Lack of sarcasm.... like THAT really happens around here. Bah Humbug!
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Nov 09
Valentines - This was actually me paying homage to your "What's wrong with our healthcare?" thread. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. I will tell you - you had me fooled.
@Stiletto (4579)
29 Nov 09
Very good, I like to start the day with a smile and your post certainly made me smile. I have no idea who is currently number 1 in the politics category and there are too many posters on here who fit your criteria perfectly to work it out from that I'm afraid. I wonder if they recognise themselves though ........
3 people like this
• United States
29 Nov 09
Very good question. "I wonder if they recognise themselves". That made me laugh, but it is kind of sad.
2 people like this
@thea09 (18305)
• Greece
29 Nov 09
Ladybug you suprise me, you forgot to add say one possible thing in the tiniest way which is a difference of opinion and you're either for us or against us, hate America, have no right to speak, and why can't you just admit that everything American is superior to everything else on the planet. Brilliant post here. WHO HID THE GOAT.
2 people like this
@thea09 (18305)
• Greece
29 Nov 09
Ha, look at my ranking here and I tend to avoid it like the plague unless feeling a little develish.
2 people like this
@thea09 (18305)
• Greece
29 Nov 09
They just love generalisations here in politics, can't win the argument in a civilised way, out the anti American bigot.
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Nov 09
I am sorry, thea. I had you on permanent ignore because you hate Americans. I am kidding!!! That is # 14. Anyone who poses a difference of opinion shall be automatically called an "America-hating bigot."
2 people like this
@flower21 (765)
• Philippines
29 Nov 09
lot of mylotters think with no open minded and it is irritating a lot of my friends get rated negatively when in fact they are not arguing. the rating system get abuse most of the times very unfair to those who never know they are being rated negatively. people here most of the times are immature they think like a child most of the times. i hope this trends changes.
3 people like this
• United States
29 Nov 09
It is frustrating. There are people I have strong opposition to, but I never vote negatively. People from all sides make valuable contributions to the discussion. I would understand voting someone negative, if they came in and spammed about some random colon cleanse or viagra, but voting negative because you're closed-minded is not fair. The only way to combat that is to be sure to vote people positive when you suspect they are being targetted.
2 people like this
• Mexico
28 Nov 09
Hi Ladybugmagic: That was pretty hilarious and i think this is how some of our politicians act in the real life. Eve with that I'm pro life so i'm a little conservative in these sensitive point but I defend freedom of speech and liberties, that's what i call conservative in my private life liberalist in the public areas. Thanks for opening this interesting discussion. There's a lot of hipocrecy in the political world. Have a nice day.
3 people like this
@quinnkl (1667)
• United States
30 Nov 09
There ya go!! You figured it out!!! LOLOLOL Love it
1 person likes this
@quinnkl (1667)
• United States
1 Dec 09
That is so true. There is yelling, name calling, lies, but no one LEARNS anything. No one researches and bothers to find out the facts. Just sad and disappointing... and to me at this point annoying. What can we say. Quinn is my last name!! Irish and lovin it!!!! Good for you! Keep it up!
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Nov 09
Maybe one day this will no longer be "republican-lot". But, I am thrilled I am learning about all sorts of people. The intriguing part is that when fighting and protesting in person, there is only name calling, and no attempt to learn. I am guilty of it. I did naughties when sharing the street corner with the proponents of prop 8. So, even though I face some strong opposition here on mylot, and I, too harbour a lot of opposition to people's views, we do get to hide behind our 'puter screens and actually hear what the other is saying, and try to learn from it. Even if just to strengthen our own arguments. But at least we are not outside with a megaphone saying who is going to hell that particular day. What does quinnkl mean? Is your name quinn? I really do want a megaphone. Where does one get one?
@ZephyrSun (7381)
• United States
28 Nov 09
Well I'm really surprised that you were reading my mind LOL Thanks for the great laugh!
2 people like this
• United States
28 Nov 09
I had to post it. It helped to relieve some growing frustration.
• United States
30 Nov 09
Wow - thank you. I could never figure out why I was never number 1 in that category (or any category for that matter). Of course, I spent more time worrying about why it didn't matter to me to be number 1 anywhere. I also intrigued me that those posters did not seem to have jobs. I wondered how big their butts are - sitting around posting useless pieces of garbage prose - monuments to bigotry. I wondered why they did not get off their big butts and go out into the world and try to make it a better place. But in the end, they make no difference in my world - what is important is that i - and others like me- continue the 'fight' to make the world liveable for everyone. For evil to exist, all it takes is for one good man to do nothing. Those people are sad and hateful. It takes a lot of energy to be that sad and hateful. In the end, they are ineffective.
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Nov 09
I have often wondered the same thing. It took me four FULL days to make thirty posts.
@eddify (412)
• Pakistan
1 Dec 09
I think when u r on a community as big as mylot one needs to their racist ideas home and not say things that oculd hurt someone's feeelings.
1 person likes this
• United States
1 Dec 09
I think the only advantage to the fact that they bring their intolerant feelings in a place like mylot, is that it shows who they really are in true life. And that problems like this still exist and need to be addressed. It's sad, and sadly, it's true.
@jb78000 (15139)
28 Nov 09
lots of handy hints there ladybug if you argue with my i WILL hide your aphids
1 person likes this
@thea09 (18305)
• Greece
29 Nov 09
My goat has already eaten them jb.
1 person likes this
• United States
28 Nov 09
I aim to please.
1 person likes this
@xfahctor (14118)
• Lancaster, New Hampshire
29 Nov 09
ah HA! so it's YOU hiding your OWN goat then isn't it thea!....you trying for a reality show or something?
1 person likes this
@vandana7 (100617)
• India
29 Nov 09
I am not an American, so I dont think my opinions will really matter. But still I can say, I enjoyed this one. :)
• United States
29 Nov 09
Thanks, and yet, my ranking went down. Soon, I will take it as a compliment being in the bottom 7000. Someone is not playing fair somewhere.
4 people like this
@vandana7 (100617)
• India
29 Nov 09
We are not valuing you as per those ranks. :) Well it was clearly mentioned light hearted. I dont find it reasonable to get annoyed with this. Our political parties are quite like this. With a few minor changes, this would apply to our set of politicians as well.:)
3 people like this