Violated - Personal space by
By linamachina
@linamachina (521)
United States
December 12, 2009 3:30pm CST
A fly. This happened to me last night at a meeting. I was sitting across some people talking when I saw a fly buzzing about right in front of my nose. I had my glasses on and the fly looked like a huge black bird when it flew very close to my face. I did what normal people people do, I waved it away, I stayed calm but my arms did not obey as it imitated the motions of a helicopter or windmill, only this fly was not to be deterred and landed on my the left lens of my glasses and stayed there. No kidding, no exaggeration, no amount of waving or shaking of my head moved this fly. I somehow thought the fly was a bronco rider in its past life as it refused to take off from my glasses. I finally (light bulb went off in my head) took off my glasses and shook the glasses, of course now I am as blind as a bat. But the fly finally took off and landed on the neighbor's cell phone which he shut and dispense the fly rather handily. We didn't believe him at first that he just shut the case but he opened it and the fly rolled out a lot less robust as he was when flying on and about my face. This of course brought about a rather observant and obvious statement from me,"Did you see that?! That fly landed on my glasses and wouldn't get off!" I now have my glasses back on and could see, that yes, everyone had witnessed the rather humorous event. So to turn this into a discussion, what if anything or anyone has violated your personal space in a very public way?
3 people like this
6 responses
@thea09 (18305)
• Greece
12 Dec 09
Hi lina, i see you've received a certain new strain of fly there which I sent over specially to breed and annoy. Did you realise it was a Greek fly. They are bold and land on people and things and are generally too fast for a fly swatter. As your arms are always swinging around anyway I would think most people are already used to this little quirk of yours so wouldn't really rush to your rescue when you were in need of it from 'the fly'.
So what invades my personal space. Most often fishermen or morons.
1 person likes this
@linamachina (521)
• United States
12 Dec 09
Thea, I am only grateful that no one had a fly swatter as that the thought of someone swatting me in the face with a fly swatter would only have been videotaped and put on Youtube in no time at all. I am off to dinner now, peace and quiet with no personal space issues.
@linamachina (521)
• United States
12 Dec 09
Thea, maybe this fly was a Greek fisherman or a moron in its previous life. But it was so kind of you to send it my way during a meeting. As I explained to Hatley, I am glad no one came to my rescue as it most assurdly would mean injury to my glasses or my face, which from previous discussion, bruises quite easily. Am I to assume that you rid the fisherman or morons by swatting at them to get them away from your personal space?
1 person likes this
@cloudwatcher (6861)
• Australia
12 Dec 09
We have flyscreens on every window and door, so we don't have many fly intrusions in the house. Outdoors though can be a problem, but I guess arms waving around is not so noticeable then. Besides, most here would recognise it as "the great Australian salute" as we call brushing flies away from the area of the head.
I have an acquaintance who is guilty of invading everyone's personal space, but he doesn't realise he is doing it. He is known for much talking, and has a habit of moving closer and closer as he talks, with the other person stepping further and further back, while trying to be careful not to get caught in a corner. Some of us butt in to "rescue" the one being invaded.
@linamachina (521)
• United States
13 Dec 09
Hi Cloudwatcher, thank you, I will convey to those at the meeting that I was doing "the great Australian salute" when I see them. Next to the fly, the "close talker" is the other annoying invasion of space. As often I am a bit shy in coming right out and telling someone they are too close until I am backed into a corner, then the hand comes out and I have to say, stop, you are too close. You are very kind to save people from the "space invader"!
@cloudwatcher (6861)
• Australia
13 Dec 09
Flies only get in if we leave the door open while talking to someone, or when checking the mail box or some such thing. They must have a lookout and send a signal "door open" cos it's only open for a few minutes at most. We have security screens on every opening and flies don't get in, but ANTS get in somewhere!
@thea09 (18305)
• Greece
13 Dec 09
Cloud, don't you find they get through the screens? Well the very small ones do through mine but I don't have them everywhere. And when it's actual flies when it is fly season nothing can keep them out when I cook it seems.
Lina, you need THE LOOK when people invade your space, I find people do that all the time in supermaket check out queues, after the look they usually step back again.
@cream97 (29087)
• United States
12 Dec 09
Hi, linamachina! If my personal space was violated I would feel very uncomfortable. I would want the violator to go away as soon as possible. I know that I will not be able to focus or concentrate on what I was doing while being disturbed. I am sorry about your incident with the annoying fly. I am glad that this fly is no longer a violation to your personal space.
@linamachina (521)
• United States
12 Dec 09
Thank you cream97, I quite agree with you as that I do not enjoy anyone or thing, much less a fly invading my space. I, too, would have great difficulty concentrating as evidenced last night, in mid-sentenced I stopped talking and started the windmill action with my arms.
@starsailover (7829)
• Mexico
13 Dec 09
Hi cream: it's normal that you don't feel comfortable if someone is doing something that disturbs you. In those cases it's better to express what you think about this issue or you won't feel well maybe for a whole day. I think the metaphore of the fly it's excellent to illustrate this situation. Thanks for your answer. Have a nice day.
-Alvaro.
@starsailover (7829)
• Mexico
13 Dec 09
Hi lina machina: Nice way to introduce your discussion. If a person violates my personal place in a public way I'd try to defend myself as you do with this, depending on the situation i would stand and front this person that is violating my space, i would shout or i would ask for help but you can not ask as if nothing is happend if you don't feel comfortable with the situation. Basically it's like the example of the fly you tell us. Thanks for staring this discussion, the way you present the subject it's superb. Have a nice day.
-Alvaro.
@linamachina (521)
• United States
13 Dec 09
Hi Starsailover, I appreciate your comment and I'm glad you were interested by the introduction. I agree with you that in a public location, a stranger violates your personal space, intentionally, then one must definitely take action because you can never be too careful. I hope that I never meet a person that is like "my fly" as that it would not leave me no matter the amount of waving I did, but I did persevere.
@blackflorinel (475)
• Romania
13 Dec 09
hmm look's like you ware quite violated :D by a fly :)) i hate fly's i wish thei would die al of them i just can se there use in the world except feeding spiders :D and birds
@linamachina (521)
• United States
14 Dec 09
Hi Blackflorinel, there are many people disturbed by flies. They truly have no boundaries or fear, well at least no fear of me waving my arms around. I do agree with you that spiders and birds can have all the flies and I would not be sad, but perhaps a little leery of humongous spiders or birds if they ate every fly in the world (smile). When I think about it, I much rather have a fly land on my glasses and violate my personal space than a huge spider or bird ....
@cscushman (81)
• United States
13 Dec 09
I don't have much to add to the discussion as far as any personal space being violated, but I must say that was a really funny story. Adding to the story is the picture / animation you have for your profile...seeing it moving back and forth kind of went with the story...haha.
@linamachina (521)
• United States
13 Dec 09
Hi Cscushman, Welcome to myLot. Thank you for thinking the story funny. It is funny if one is watching it happen, but as that it is happening to me, I can only envision the worst and hope that no one thought to video tape it. Also, thanks for pointing out that the story goes with my avatar. I guess I picked the appropriate one for me! You don't mind if people get too close to you while talking or standing next to you? It bothers quite a few people, myself included.
@linamachina (521)
• United States
14 Dec 09
I can't use the smiley icons yet so "Thumbs up to you!"
@cscushman (81)
• United States
13 Dec 09
I may notice that maybe they are getting too close, but it doesn't bother me. I grew up in a family where everyone sort of gets in your face when they talk and get close - so I'm used to it.
