They have not sent me any Christmas Cards?

Thank you. I cant cut off my good memories like my ex husbands family did. The number of times I had his family here for meals and the amount of presents I had to buy. The outings we did together. Its hard to believe they may all turn out believing my ex husband.

I hope they don't forget you and your daughter. But in case they do, you have no choice but to move forward. Just continue praying for them. Maybe they are yet to accept the situation. I hope and pray that they will soon realize the goodness of your heart.

Thanks for this. Your situation with your ex-inlaws sounds very similar to mine. Hard to believe people can be like this.

Hi Jenny. Your discussion just touched my heart. I have felt really down about losing the friendship I thought we had when I was with my ex. I feel betrayed because they didn't even listen to my side of what happened. They didn't even care that I was beaten and abused mentally either. I thought we were all real tight but I guess I didn't know my bottom from a hole in the ground. Oh well they lost a good friend when they cut you out of their lives. And my ex's family lost a good friend when they cut me out of their lives. As long as God still loves me and my husband that I have now loves me everything is great. God loves you and I think your a special person. Pray God brings you many blessings!

Thank you very much for your kind comments. I hope I find another loving partner eventually.

I'm sorry. I feel I wrote the response in a rude way. I just wrote my true feelings. I am from a very traditional family. That may be a reason why I think like this. I don't know your situation or what made you to get seperated from him. Yes, we can't get rid of sweet memories. Hope you will be able to adjust with that. Wish you a good Christmas. God bless you.

I'm sorry. Please don't worry about the people who don't care about you. Think about the other people who care for you and be happy. We can't make anybody love or care for us. Caring or love should come from mind. Forget about those people and look at your future. You are yet to find lots of nice people and going to have happy and fun times with them.

On the first two days , he moved in with sister, having a big influence on them. Thats when the latest trouble first started. Even though he is not living with them now, he has a big influence on them, being in regular contact.

Yes, I was close to most of them, especially Daves neice and nephew. Im hoping its a temporary thing, but my ex carries anger with him forever, and this will influence them.

Did you think of them as family jenny? If you did you won't want to lose them and there's no reason for them to push you out. Hopefully it's just the initial blip and then they'll be back in touch. I actually met and was very close to my Greeks family before I met him, and I was a little wary in case things went wrong that I'd lose them, but we keep it separate from the family.

Well, he probablyis making a big deal about me not being nice to them.. who knows.. they simply wont contact me and I have tried.

Yes I did send them Christmas cards as I wrote in my discussion.

well in truth it is a hard situation for an "ex" family to stay in close contact with their child (family's) ex. We have been the family in a similar scenario. Twice actually. With one my brother in law could care less if we spoke to his ex wife and her family who we had all become close to. With the other brother in law though, he would become very irritated and down right beastly if we had contact with either of his ex wives. Hard considering the second wife we had grown up with and where friends with years before they had ever even met. It is still early and they may not know what lines have been drawn and be lying low so as not to be taking your side over your ex's. For all you know he could be making a big deal about you even being nice to them, also ( I don't know your ex but it is pretty common) you do not know what he is saying about you. They may believe you are ruining his life and taking him for all he's worth and basically being a total B. As for your child if she asks questions tell her you do not know why they are behaving the way they are and then have her ask them herself. If it bothers you so much call and ask to speak to them about it to clear up any hard feelings or clear up what might have been said.

Yes, he would mind, as he is the vindictive type who lets anger go on forever.

His family is probably just like him and holds grudges. If they are not like him, they probably figure he would be mad at them and are trying to avoid that.

I guess her not being his child explains why they don't keep in touch as much. When you were together though, they probably got close to her and consider her their relative. Do you think your ex-husband would care if they stayed in touch with you?

My daughter says very little about it, except that she likes it at home much better now, without my ex being here.

In my eyes, christmas isn't for the cards you send and recieve. Have a nice time, thats what christmas is about.

They are in denial, thats for sure. My daughter and I are planning a great Christmas, and we are going to my brothers. Hope you have a great Christmas too.

That is so totally stupid. You have been together 17 years and they still dont acknowledge you or send a christmas card. That is so bad.

When my brother & his wife separated, my parents and I stayyed in contact with his ex, and my brother doesnt care.

that's how my family is also. It should be that way I think.

I can understand in many instances when a couple separate that contact with the rest of the family may cease. When my brother & ex sister in law separated, my parents and myself kept in contact with his ex wife, and still do after all these years. With my ex's family, the stopped contact was absolutely immediate. I had been close to them for nearly 7 years. They offered me no support whatsoever. I even told them that DV was involved for 2.5 years. They simply cant or wont believe this, so instead of offering some sort of support, they have decided that I am evil. Anyway, there is a lot more to it than that.

No, there is no chsnce of that. Our marriage consisted of domestic violence over the years, which he cant accept and neither can his family. You are very kind, like a lot of My Lotters here. Thank you.

i hope and i pray that they wont forget you.. and of course i pray that you will have a happy holiday and a prosperous new year.. be strong jenny.. if you want someone to talk to, we are just here on mylot ready and very willing to help you out..

I am sure they wont be sending Christmas presents. Im afriaid my ex husband and I wont be working things out. We separated due to domestic violene.

Well, i'm sorry to hear that. Your a smart woman, i can tell that your a strong human being. Its their lost honey. I'm sorry you were involved with domestic vol. Maybe they dont deserve you. Pray for them and move on.

That is a good summary of the situation.

I do know that some of them want no contact at all. The others havent really said.

We always post Christmass cards, and yes, the post office is over loaded at the moment.

No worries about your english.

Yes, I guess moving on with my life is the best move. I mostly am anyway, its just with Chrisatmas coming up I thought some of my ex -inlaws would contact me.

Well, yes, his family are unhappy that we separated, but they support my ex that he separated from me. I dont think its taking things too far to expect that in laws I was close to for 7 years, should keep in contact.

Thank you, that is the way I feel. My ex husband has told them a lot of lies, and they dont even want to listen to the truth.