Is Kiss appropriate for First Date?
By maria1081
@maria1081 (1251)
Philippines
December 25, 2009 12:06am CST
Its worth looking forward to a date you know you will enjoy. Having someone company gives a feeling of belonging. My ideal date is simple, I can enjoy watching movie, dinning in a restaurant or just walking in the beach. For me having a good conversation and good laughs can make a date more memorable. When you become comfortable with your date, is it appropriate to kiss on the First Date? If yes, on the cheeks or on the lips?
7 people like this
45 responses
@sasalove (1709)
• China
28 Dec 09
Hi Maria,
It is quite nice that you feel comfortable with your date and reckon that you are able to proceed further or end up with the marriage. But I prefer not to process too past. If my feeling is good and I am surely that he likes me at the first sight, I will let him hold my hands first, not any kiss. After all, for the first time, he will not show you the negative image and what his words is not really it is. I am just afraid of the infectious disease that will through the saliva to spread.
@maria1081 (1251)
• Philippines
28 Dec 09
haha...what kind of disease is that? I hope nothing serious.
@UpsideDownPineapple (643)
• United States
25 Dec 09
Cheek. Only. Always.
I feel like anything else could send out the wrong message. Like, "I'm a really nice girl and I'm so, so, soooooo excited to be your date - you're the best!" And it's just the first date, you don't really know the person. Most people try really hard on first dates - what if he was just being fake?
Or it could send the message "I'm looking for a guy just to have fun with, I do this kind of thing all of the time...yup, all the time. I don't think you're special or anything, but you're good enough for me."
That's some peoples attitude and they can send out those messages but that's not my attitude. I don't want there to be any misunderstandings about who I am or what I'm looking for.
@UpsideDownPineapple (643)
• United States
25 Dec 09
Oh, and for me that stands until at least the 3rd. lol
@tawny_24 (341)
• United States
25 Dec 09
I totaly agree with you. Third or fourth date is safe zone for a nice peck. If it turns into tounge down your throat woah I can tell you had burritos for lunch it's a deal breaker, even if it is the tenth date first kiss you still don't know the guy. And the tounge thing is a huge red flag on a first kiss.
@earthsong (589)
• United States
26 Dec 09
I'm not sure where you are from and what your culture finds appropriate for dating, but in my opinion it is up to the individual. If you are comfortable with that, when and where you kiss is up to you.
@earthsong (589)
• United States
27 Dec 09
I find that commendable, no matter where you are from. I think you have the right idea. I don't see why you would want to be intimate in any way with someone you don't think might be worthy of more time and possibly a commitment. My oldest daughter is 18, she is a beautiful girl who was nominated homecoming queen at her school. Until last summer she had never kissed a boy, and just recently has had her first boyfriend. Boys were just not a priority on her list.
@maria1081 (1251)
• Philippines
27 Dec 09
Hi there. Im from Philippines and grew up in a bit conservative environment. I dont kiss someone whom I dont see as my potential boyfriend. And for the record, i had only three ex-boyfriends.
@cobradene (1171)
• India
25 Dec 09
It really depends how the couple spend their time. I mean, regarding the conversation level, compatibility, and are they really able to get close or intimate enough to feel for each other, and is there a chemistry building up so fast, and is it so natural enough for both of you to feel that you have already started liking each other. There are many factors involved. I have experienced this with one of my friends years back. We just met for lunch and spoke for a long time, and we around a bit, and instantly we were both comfortable with each other. We had no inhibitions at all, we shared a great chemistry.
I have never imagined holding hands and walking with a girl on my first date, which we did, and also it was more of an inner connection which we could develop. We just created an instant happiness and feeling of joy, and didn't concentrate on the physical aspect at all... But it was so natural when it came to saying goodbye, we just hugged and kissed each other on the cheeks.
So, I guess you would have to go with the feeling first and see where it leads. You just have to be natural, very natural and not think too much about a kiss or lovemaking on a first date should be fine or not.
Just be yourself, and be natural, and flow with the heart, but don't lose your rationale.
@maria1081 (1251)
• Philippines
25 Dec 09
I remember that I had a date with a good friend before. We spend the day hiking and visiting a church at the top of the mountain. As we were going down we joke about something (I cant seem to remeber now) and he ended up kissing me in the forehead. It just happened naturally, I know that the kiss was a signed of respect and way of saying goodbye since I was dating my ex-boyfriend that time which I never kiss during dating.
@bulastika (5966)
• Philippines
26 Dec 09
Cheeks? Are you related or something? lolz.
What kind of guy who going to kiss his date on a cheeks..lolz..
If I want it to be romantically safe I rather kiss her hand than her cheeks..lolz..
Lips..now that what I called kissing.. but cheeks? damn.. Its like kissing your uncle or auntie..lolz
@maria1081 (1251)
• Philippines
26 Dec 09
Kiss on the cheek is romantic too as long as you are sincere enough with your good intention.
@myramae19 (667)
• Philippines
26 Dec 09
First date? for me its too early for a kiss..this stage is knowing each other.but when i was in college I have known someone going out for a date and just after for a kiss, just to know if the guy is really a good kisser or not.,if the guy is a good kisser then she will continue to date him, but if not she won't allow for a second date.bad cheetah huh!
@maria1081 (1251)
• Philippines
26 Dec 09
Who's that girl? She's so mean. I think any kiss is good when share it with someone you love. Right?
@myramae19 (667)
• Philippines
26 Dec 09
yeah right!! well she 's my classmate she is 4 years older than me, she had so many experienced in kissing, she kissed out of love, all she wants is to experience and to know if the guy is really a good kisser.ha ha she's totally insane!aren't she??? I don't know where she is now. That is about 7 years ago. i just remember her when i read the discussion you have start:) ha ha
@sarahruthbeth22 (43143)
• United States
31 Dec 09
The answer is Yes And No. Yes if you two really connect. I mean if it feels right , at the end why not kiss. And no, if you, one or the other or both, don't feel connected. By the end you just want to run away home , then a kiss in the last thing to do. It all depends. What type of kiss? I don't know.it is up to the couple.
@silverglint (2000)
• Philippines
11 Jan 10
Usually the guys that I date are already my friends before they express any romantic interest on me, so I am already comfortable with them when we start dating formally. I think if that is the case then maybe a kiss on the cheek (especially if I really liked the guy), is quite okay, but I don't think I would be ready to kiss a guy immediately on the lips. My principle is that I would only kiss a guy on the lips when I am ready to go steady with him. I seldom go on blind dates, I can't even imagine kissing a guy that I just met hehehe
@mzz663 (2772)
• United States
31 Dec 09
I give a quick peck on the cheek unless I have a strong attraction to the person and it just feels right. I think a kiss on the cheek is okay and is kind of impersonal, kind of like a handshake, not really intimate but memorable if needed later down the road. Some people are really impressed by the kiss on the cheek.
@smileonstar (4007)
• United States
25 Dec 09
Hi,
well,... I never date people here in the US. but most of people don't kiss on first date. I dont know but that's what I heard from a friend of mine. If a kiss has to have then on a cheeks for a good night kiss or on a hand.
If you have a second date and you feel comfortable to kiss him then go a head...
@starsailover (7829)
• Mexico
25 Dec 09
Hi smile on star: I think the same here. In my case I would say that it's better to not kiss someone on the first date simply because you are about to know him/ her better, it's not enough time to be sure of what you are doing. You need to know better a person to be sure that, this is love. Thanks for your answer. Hope you are having a nice day. Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays. Take care.
-Alvaro.
@joyadalia (1408)
• Philippines
16 Jan 10
That definitely depends on the date Still, hormones and feelings could get in the way so that many people find themselves kissing on their first date. There is no absolute right or wrong here - it all depends on you and if the act is consensual, of course.
@crimsonladybug (3112)
• United States
25 Dec 09
For me it depends on the date. If it's a blind date who I've just met, there would have to be a pretty major connection to make a kiss, of any kind - lips, cheek, hand - appropriate. If I've been friends with the guy in some capacity and we decide to try taking the friendship to the next level and go on a date, then the kiss would depend on how the date went. If being out together in a romantic environment is horrible and awkward then probably shouldn't seal it with a kiss. But if it turns out that dating was the totally right decision then, sure, why not? I guess, it all boils down to what feels right.
@rupesh1988 (129)
• India
25 Dec 09
Hieee Maria
It depends upon persons to persons.If your dating a person who is your good friend & you know each other for a long time , then its really ok to kiss on first date, it depend how much like that person & your comfortable to kiss with that person. But if your dating a person who is really a stranger for you then you should avoid kiss on the first date, 1st you should find out which type of that person is, i mean his nature & all because there are many fords guys now a days.
@maria1081 (1251)
• Philippines
25 Dec 09
Yes it should be a rule that if you date someone you barely knew then dont let him/her kiss you. You might be giving a wrong signal that can be easily misinterpret by the other person thus resulting to date disater.
@oluomachux (12)
• Germany
25 Dec 09
good one there. but i don't see it appropriate to kiss or do anything of such on the first date. if i really want to give my lady that feeling of comfort and respect, i won't allow the date to get to that extent. starting a date that way can make you not to really see or know whom you are out with better than the romance you would get.
@maria1081 (1251)
• Philippines
25 Dec 09
What about flying kiss? lol. Yes you are right respect is essential for a person to earn your trust.
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
27 Dec 09
I guess it depends on the situtaion and how well you both have hit it off, if you feel a mutual attraction and you both feel comfortable then a kiss on the cheek would be appropriate. I am not sure about a kiss on the lips because that is a bit forward and too intimate certainly for a first date but that's my opinion. A kiss is nice, a sign of affection and a thank you, it also depends on the culture as well, some people expect a kiss others would think you are being too forward and expecting too much and sometimes a kiss can lead to other things which might make the other person feel uncomfortable and may even stop you from seeing them again!
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
28 Dec 09
My husband shook my hand on our first date. I think we were both sort of nervous but he more then I. I later told him he could have kissed me and I would not have minded so much. I think it's better to just give a handshake, a hug, or a kiss ont he hand or cheek, but on the lips I feel that would be to risky and to daring.
@walijo2008 (4644)
• United States
28 Dec 09
I guess its appropriate if your comfortable with each other, it depends on who you are, and what kind of date it is I guess. If its a blind date, I don't think I would kiss on the first date, maybe not even the second. I think it took my husband about a month of dating before he kissed me, then he asked me first if it was alright, awww how sweet..haha. I think before he would either hug me or kiss me on the cheek.
@veejay19 (3589)
• India
27 Dec 09
when i had my first date and that was a very long time ago, i was very scared. Actually i was very shy and introverted and could never look a girl in the face. However this girl had been making eyes at me for quite sometime and i fell for her hook, line and sinker.She was beautiful and sexy too. The very first time i went out with her we just walked about and talked. I did not even have the courage to hold her hand. However after a few meetings and that too surreptiously i finally got the courage to hold her hand and it sent shivers in my body. I am talking of a time about 42 years back when conservativism was to the fore.Finally when i did smooch her it was directly on her lips and she too reacted with vigour. Perhaps sh was waiting impatiently for me to make the first move. After that there was no looking back. It was pure passion all the way, from both sides, hehehe.After her i never dated anothr girl again in my entire life.She was my first and last love.
@Ritchelle (3790)
• Philippines
27 Dec 09
i like your post since it is a type of discussion that would get very different kinds of responses. but the answer of a particular mylotter would always depend on his culture. i've been hearing that in western countries the third date is the much awaited date for reasons greater than that of getting a kiss. whereas, in the philippines (where i am from) the third date (most of the time, hopefully) is just any other date .
@hagirl (1295)
• United States
27 Dec 09
I think it is appropriate as long as there are no mixed feelings being offered. I think the cheek or lips is under the discretion of the couple and how the evening went.Maybe it should be closed mouth though either way. That is something that is a intimate thing to share with someone....as making love is.