Meeting people online you do not know knowing the risks!
By emkomar69
@emkomar69 (31)
Canada
January 6, 2010 5:28pm CST
Most people enjoy the internet and meeting new people with like interests as themselves
but meeting people you have never met before, there are many people out there using different user profiles then themselves for one. You may think you are speaking to a woman and yet you are not, there are a lot of messed up people we all know that do sick and twisted things to kids or teens. There are smarter and safer ways to meet people and be sure you are getting what you thought you were, like someone saying they are older then they really are only to find out they are not. This topic has recently been an issue in my life with someone I know meeting someone online or the fist time and the day they met in REAL life they moved in with them. I care for this person and tried to get through to them as to what a dangerous thing it is they are doing, with no success. Would anyone go to meet someone for an online date alone and move in with them that day, of course not I thought until recently. I am very concerned for the next generation realizing the danger of this type of dating:)
2 people like this
12 responses
@allyoftherain (7208)
• United States
7 Jan 10
I've never tried online dating, but I've made some good friends online. There are a couple that I've know online for years, and I only recently met them for the first time. It was great to finally meet someone I'd already known online for forever.
I don't think online dating is a good idea. I don't think you should meet someone online and then go out and try to meet them immediately. I'd say if you were to meet someone you'd met online, you should at least have known them for a long time, preferably more than one year. It's not likely that someone putting on a charade to lure you into a trap is going to be patient enough to keep it up for a year.
@emkomar69 (31)
• Canada
7 Jan 10
Very true there is good and bad in everything, I enjoy all of my online friends and find they all seem to have different views on this topic. I happen to find it bit uncomfortable due to the nature of knowing someone I care about is taking this type of chance with their life. Let me ask you if you talk to them online for a year would it then make sense to move in with them the day you met first time in person ? Likely you will agree it is not advisable as a smart thing to do, I have tried everything to get this point across to someone I know and care for and they just are not hearing me.
Thanks for you r response
on this topic I am dealing with :)
@allyoftherain (7208)
• United States
7 Jan 10
No, I don't think that moving in with someone you've only just met in person is a good idea. No matter how long you've known each other online. I'm really sorry your friend has put you in a spot this way. I hope it all works out for the best.
@emkomar69 (31)
• Canada
7 Jan 10
Thanks for your thought on this I agree that in many cases online dating is here to stay and for some everything turns out roses, I am concerned about the younger girls and women that may not be aware of the dangers. With common sense and caution then whatever works to bring together two people that may not have met any other way. I also wonder what life will be like for my youngest when they grow to a teen, will things change to most people meeting online rather then interacting in person.
@agonyaunt69 (343)
• Hong Kong
7 Jan 10
Hi emkomar69,
I agree. There are risks when meeting people that we know online. I have never experienced it before. When the day comes, I think I would ask some companions to go with me. It is not easy to trust someone online, as it is hard to know if he/she is telling the truth. Though I do have some good friends in the facebook, I have not a chance to meet them. They are too far away. Of course, we have to think thoroughly before we confirm the appointment. We must have good communications for a long time, like over 6 months, and to feel if they are really good persons. So, I do think that youngsters are more dangerous in this situations. They are easily trust people when hearing sweet words.
Have a nice day!
agonyaunt69
(1:50am 8 Jan 2010, Hong Kong time)
@emkomar69 (31)
• Canada
7 Jan 10
I agree with you there are nice people out there and then some not so nice, so true enough young girls and older I guess hear some sweet words and let their judgment slide. I am glad that most people out there have thought through safety plans before meeting people online. Thanks so much for responding to this topic I now have a few more ideas to help out my friend. :)
@good2go2001 (915)
• United States
7 Jan 10
I would agree with the danger fact you just dont know who your talking to. I do find it to be alittle safer if you spend a long time getting to know the person..online and with phone conversations and pictures and webcam. Most people who lie cant keep it up for very long. Make sure you are comparing what they have said in the past to see if it adds up with what they are saying to you now. I still think even after all this there is always risks. You need to be cautious in meeting first time in person..taking a friend along, meet during the day, meet in public heavy traffic area and definitely not move in with the person the same day you meet them lol. I do see with increase dependence on internet there will be more and more of these type relationships going from online to real life. Its alot more common now that it ever was.
@emkomar69 (31)
• Canada
7 Jan 10
Great point here about meeting in the daytime as well as in a high traffic area, keeping track of what has been said and if any of it measures up. I think even meeting someone in person and moving in with them that day makes no sense, my friend does not agree and I do not agree with them. I has been trying to find different ways to get through to them and thought throwing this topic out there might give me some new fresh ideas. It really has helped in many ways I hope I will find a way to help them, as it is a thing of the future and will not be going away, so if there are guidelines for safety in place and just some common sense then some people will meet others that they may have never had a chance to meet before. Thanks for responding to this topic it has given me some new ideas to try to get through to my friend to think this through. :)
@asfiona (174)
• India
7 Jan 10
Hi, I myself have never try for chating on net and try to meet someone through internet. Its kind of something not very good. I completely agrre with you. We don;t know the person personally. From distance anyone can create impressive image on net while in reality who knows?
@emkomar69 (31)
• Canada
7 Jan 10
Another really great point here there are people pretending to be someone else and really how sure can you be you are dealing with the type of person you think you are. I have gone to sites for Moms and found out there were men pretending to be Moms trying to meet women, so your right there are many different thing to consider when you are interacting online. I hope that my friend really gets a chance to read these comments and realizes that I am not the only one that thinks that being aware of what your doing and thinking it through is really the best for them. Thanks for your comment here I enjoy getting an idea of what the majority of people think about chatting online and the danger involved. :)
@MimiRemo (418)
• Philippines
7 Jan 10
I do not entertain total strangers, whether in person or online, how much more online dating. I agree with you, it's very dangerous. We do not know them for real, and what really is going through their minds. Even if they say that person seems nice and decent as what is stated in their profiles, there is simply no assurance.
@emkomar69 (31)
• Canada
7 Jan 10
Good plan not dealing at all with strangers is also a great practice I would hope that most people feel as you do, myself too. I guess for some people this type of dating and socializing could turn into a positive long term friendship or long term relationship. I enjoy interacting with online friends, I also make it clear that I am happily married and not looking for that type of relationship. My friend I want to help is not seeing any of the risks and it concerns me I hope that they will really think it through. Thanks for your comment here helps to see how many people are aware of the risks and dangers. :)
@orsen19 (6)
• Malaysia
7 Jan 10
OMG that is too extreme, atleast they could have went on for more dates, though sometimes it might be dangerous to meet a total stranger you just met online at the same time there are just good people again
you friend maybe has some problem maybe she is so desperate to get a spouse at the same time again i think she really loves there person, the thing that worries me again is the MOVING IN part, why did they have to do that
knowing someone from writing to you it not enough because its easy to write lies than telling them directly,they don't truly know each others background, OMG they really need to think hard
i would go out there and meet my date or appointment in a public and safe place where i know i can get the help i need if something arise.and one thing that i wont MOVING IN that day NOOO
@emkomar69 (31)
• Canada
7 Jan 10
I agree it is way too extreme to move in with someone you just met in any fashion to begin with. I am trying to explain this to my friend and they are just acting offended, yet I want to help. I am thrilled to get so many responses to this topic, I might ask them to read this so they might consider how absurd it sounds to most. I understand the need to socialize with other online, as in situations like this it could turn to be very helpful and informative. Thanks for your response on this topic it has eased my mind to see how many others feel as I do :)
@vivianchen (2646)
• China
7 Jan 10
Hi Emkomar69,
Meeting people you know from internet is okay, but it depends on how long have you been knowing each other? A week? A month? A year? The longer the better.
Secondly, i think meeting people from internet the frist time, should not be alone, at least 2 or 3 or you going out togeter, and i am sure your "net" friend/friends can understand too.
I will not move in with them the frist time i meet them, no matter how nice they are. I am worry about our next generation too. 
I will not move in with them the frist time i meet them, no matter how nice they are. I am worry about our next generation too. @emkomar69 (31)
• Canada
7 Jan 10
Thank you for that comment I agree with your response in so many ways, times are changing and we will have to adapt to them in all facets such as safety issues in this matter. I also think moving in with anyone you met online or in person first time and moving in with them is just such a risky thing to do. I hope by the time the next generation have grown to teen years they will be well informed to the dangers and the safe plans, as you said meeting in a group and keeping your senses aware to all being said and watch for any signs of concern.
Thanks for commenting on this topic as for me is a touchy one at the moment :)
@emkomar69 (31)
• Canada
7 Jan 10
Thanks for responding anyway most people are dealing with this today and I hope to help a friend of mine work through an unwise choice they are making. I am glad to receive so many comments to this topic, after all it will not go away. As the world catches up to the net, I hope these types of safety issues will be considered. Thanks for responding. :)
@bounce58 (17385)
• Canada
7 Jan 10
Hello emkomar69. Didn't you have that discussion about being eternally nice?
I agree that it is dangerous meeting people online. The internet has cast such a big 'net' that it now includes twisted souls that aim to victimize unsuspecting nice people. I agree that it is dangerous. But I am confident that technology will evolve, and measures will be made to arrest the danger. And like we always do, people will learn to cope.
@emkomar69 (31)
• Canada
7 Jan 10
I sure did have that discussion about being nice, this situation is happening to someone I care about. I am so concerned I thought I would throw this topic out there and see the thoughts of others on this topic in general maybe they too know someone dealing with this situation, any thoughts on this I would love to hear about. Thanks for you response very good point technology will evolve :)
@kaylachan (71762)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
8 Jan 10
I was one of those students who had the risks drilled into my head. Meeting alone is dangerous and I grow a bit concerned if I know someone doing it. When I met a few friends online, for the first time I wasn't alone. I brought a friend and we met in a public place. And, of course my family was none the wiser. But, I would never just meet someone alone.
@Torunn (8607)
• Norway
7 Jan 10
I've met many of my online friends, and I know that at least 5 couples met at a site I frequent regulary. It is not a dating site however, so you are pretty sure that you have at least one common interest. Plus we're getting quite good at spotting frauds, I think that might be more difficult at a dating site. Hope everything turns out OK for you friend, although I agree it can be risky to move in with someone the first time you meet them in real life.
@emkomar69 (31)
• Canada
7 Jan 10
I agree with you about the moving in with someone you just met, regardless of where it is that you may of met. I am glad to hear that most people have thought it through safety issues before going off and meeting their online friends for the first time. Going to meet in groups in the daytime and letting others know you are doing this. Thanks for commenting on this topic I now have some new ideas to help out my friend, thanks for considering my friends well being. :)
@thedark (156)
• India
28 Jan 10
to start with let me tell that my i my girlfriend...she became my girlfriend through the net only :D
i met her on a chat site, then slowly, we started knowing each other. i dont know about others but she is really nice and has never lied to me. we even talked with each other over phone and slowly, we started falling in love with each other.
my , over the net relationship turned into a sweet happy relationship in the real life.
im glad i met her :)
