Do you give away used things to relatives?
By daliaj
@daliaj (5674)
India
January 7, 2010 6:44am CST
I think that it is bad to give my used things to relatives or friends unless they ask for it. I prefer to give something new to them. It is the hobby of one of my aunts to give away her used stuff like clothes, electrical equipments, kids stuff, etc. to relatives. Once she sent some of her daughter's old clothes, which were not nice to my home. My Dad was very angry, went to her house, and gave it back.
1 person likes this
15 responses
@Fulltank (2882)
• Philippines
8 Jan 10
We have our old sofa given to a relative of ours and they got it refurbished and looks like a new one. The reason for giving it to them is that they ask for it. Actually we have let these relative that we are planning to dispose our old sofa and replaced it with a new one. The old one doesn't is too small for our family anymore. Its actually in good shape and only needed to change the coatings. And our relative knowing it, had just ask if we can give it to them. For clothes though, we usually sorted out the old (but wearable) ones and donated it to charities. There are lots of calamities here recently and all year round, that people needed all the help they can have. This includes old clothings, books and toys.
@daliaj (5674)
• India
8 Jan 10
Books are really worth even when they are old. I don't think somebody will throw away their old books in the waste bin. We should collect the things which can be used to give to charity organizations. I have a set of six shirts which are very good, but I can't use them because I don't fit into that. I am planning to give them to my sister. I am sure that she will be happy to recieve them.
@Fulltank (2882)
• Philippines
8 Jan 10
I really don't oppose to what you are intended to do. Its just that for us, we felt ashamed to ourselves if we give our old belongings to them. We would rather buy new clothes to them as a present rather than giving our used clothes to them. I knew they would accept whatever we will give them (including the old ones) but we never offer it anyway. We just let them know what are our plans and if they wanted it, then we give it 100%.
@SkiBabe1814 (109)
• United States
8 Jan 10
I am on the receiving end of hand-me-downs. My mother always has clothes she is giving me. I currently still have three bags of clothes she gave me six months ago to go through. She also gives me appliances. Thanks to Mom I now have 2 toaster ovens, a George Foreman Grill, a waffle maker, and two coffee pots. I also have some nice curtain rods, I am just waiting for the curtains which I should be getting soon. She is also giving me a whole new living room set. I love the hand-me-downs I get. And if it is something that I do not want, I just toss it!
@daliaj (5674)
• India
8 Jan 10
That is nice about your mother. I have a question for you. Will you take it with the same attitude if your mother-in-law gives the those things to you. I have a friend who always complain that her husband collects all of his parents old stuff. He is happy to do that, but it is difficult for her to take. I don't mind taking some old stuff from my mother if I like them.
I will say NO to some of the items which my mother gives, if I don't like them. She doesn't feel bad about that because she thinks that I have all freedom to do that. But, I don't know how the situation will be when my mother is replaced my mother-in-law. According to me, it is good to ask the person if he or she wants something before presenting old things.
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@srganesh (6340)
• India
7 Jan 10
Are you posting this in a sleepy mood daliaj
?I can't see any relation to this post under this topic.Jokes apart,what you said is right.Unless asked for,you should not force your used stuffs to other relatives.That makes them feel like beggars and surely they will get offended.I think it is a means of insulting.No,I won't do it.
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@angelajoy (1825)
• Philippines
8 Jan 10
I think it depends on how you give stuff to people. I always give things that I don't use anymore to my family and to my other relatives. They don't mind because I ask them first if they want some stuff before giving it to them. I give stuff away because it would be such a waste to just throw them out. It would be better if someone else could use them.
@vinslounge (1295)
• India
7 Jan 10
I dont think its bad to give our used things to our relatives since its not a bad idea to do that. I used to give my old toys( childhood), cricket bats, equipments and other things to my close cousins and they never make fuss out of those things and happily accepts them. Thanks a lot for starting this discussion and enjoy mylotting. Cheers:-0
@daliaj (5674)
• India
8 Jan 10
I think your young cousins would have happily accepted your sports equipments. I know the liking of young generation, especially boys in teens, towards sports equipments. I have a cousin who is 16 years old. He made my father buy circket bat and ball for him. His latest demand is to buy a sports cycle. Sports cycle is very expensive. So, his father put that on hold for the time being.
@ammu2811 (20)
• India
8 Jan 10
Generally When it comes to relatives, I don't prefer to give any used things to them but I prefer to poor or needy people.
As per my experience, how much you give relatives don't appreciate much. So it's better to avoid relatives.
Let me know your views on the same.
Thank you,
Jogesh
@daliaj (5674)
• India
8 Jan 10
I am happy to share my views on your reponse. I also felt that relatives never or rarely appreciates if we give our old things. They may be in need of the thinking we give away and the thing would be of good use to them, but they will give the impression that they are not poor to recieve that, but they are accepting because we have given them. I don't like that atttitude. So, I prefer to give to some orphanage or poor people. They will appreciate and be thankful for it.
@nocturn98 (956)
• Venezuela
7 Jan 10
I would be thankful for things given to me be it new or used. It doesn't matter if I asked for it or not, it's always the thought that counts. But it still depends on what is given to me. If it was a used underwear, I can just say "no, thank you."
@srganesh (6340)
• India
7 Jan 10
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@daliaj (5674)
• India
7 Jan 10
You made me laugh too. It is good that you can appreciate it if somebody gives you used things. I have the culture that accepting used things is embarssment. So, I wanted to know how this works with other cultures. I don't like to accept any used things even if it is expensive and in a good condition. I don't mind if it is gold, platinu, or any other expensive metal.
@drakesuyat (1063)
• Philippines
8 Jan 10
i myself wont do it unless they ask for it and i'll let them choose from those used clothes whichever they want. this is to avoid those words like, giving old clothes as if relatives are poor or like cleaning up mess and giving it to them and all those unlikely words and you cant avoid it especially to relatives. if there are old clothes that i would voluntarily give, i would better give it to charity. happy mylotting
@bellis716 (4799)
• United States
9 Jan 10
When I was a child, it was the custom to pass childrens clothing down the line of cousins as long as they held together. I was happy to be the oldest grandchild. I got hand me downs from my mother's younger sisters. Some of them were especially nice. Without them, my wardrobe would have been sparse. This was 60 years ago. You'll say that times are different now, but are they? People are still the same. Some are appreciative and some are not. It would have been better to have kept the clothes and donate them to a homeless shelter.
@agv0419 (3022)
• Philippines
8 Jan 10
There's nothing wrong about giving used things, like us we gave our used clothes that we seldom wear to our relatives. As long as it can still be use and functional. Now that life is very hard it is very disappointing to throw things that you can still be use.
@yogambal_64 (1014)
• India
9 Jan 10
Hi daliaj, I think it is a very bad habit to give away your used things to your relatives unless they are really in need of it or ask for it. Your aunt can give them to the poor or needy or to some orphanage or oldage homes where they will really bless her for her kindness. You did a good job by returning back, you should also have given some old stuffs along with it to her and seen her reaction.
@sahsports4883 (441)
• United States
8 Jan 10
Hello,
I wouldn't mind getting something used, especially if I could use it and it wouldn't go to waste. Right now with this awful economy I would be grateful for anything. I've given used items to people in my family and they were fine with it, sure people like new things but if it's something they need at the moment or can use than I'm sure most people wouldn't mind. I'd rather give items away that I no longer need or want instead of throwing them away.
@xJaiiDK (163)
• Philippines
8 Jan 10
I think it depends on what the situation is. If for instance they've gone shopping and there will be no more room for other clothes, then why not ask your relatives if they want some?. I think relatives are their first priority after the beggars. That is how i think of it. i dont know about others
@augzmae (15)
• Philippines
8 Jan 10
there is nothing wrong about giving your old things to your relatives as long as they are useful and not to be thrown. I understand your dad's point maybe i would do the same thing but as a relative if you can't use it then throw it or you can give it to the charity. yes, i give away my old things to my relatives but i always check if they are still useful.
@beabenitez (153)
• Philippines
7 Jan 10
yeah u are right there, unless they ask u can give something they like....for me its not good to give old things which u do not used anymore to others...its like passing ur garbage to others.
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