When people do not pay you back
@birdlady41465 (223)
United States
January 7, 2010 9:34am CST
Ok when people ask to borrow money and you do and they say they will pay you back on the 1st but the first come and you need your money for picking up your medication and they tell you they do not have your money but you know they do then they ask you what you need the money for. You tell them they give you the amount you need for that but they owe you more what do you do when they say well I can let you borrow it what do you think or say to this when they owe you more then they give you to pick up what you need? Is it your money or are you borrowing there money when it comes to them owing you to begin with? Does this them saying they can loan you your own money make any sense? Please explain there thinking someone before it drives me totally crazy. I have 2 people right now doing this to me.
6 responses
@Fulltank (2882)
• Philippines
8 Jan 10
Then learn from their mistakes. Do not give to the next person who is asking for money. That way, you will not worry anymore. Two people had done this already to you and if you let a third one, then it becomes your mistake. Experience sometimes is the best teacher, so why not listen to it.
1 person likes this
@hagirl (1295)
• United States
8 Jan 10
A few get away from me but 9 times out of ten if anyone wants to borrow money I type up a promissory note that they and you have to sign. That way no one gets amnesia. If they owe you money it is not any of their business what you want it back for it was your money to start with.... birdlady you know me personally so you know the way I am and things can get out of hand if you do not start getting promissory notes signed..... We even do it for family now for the simple reason alot of times they are the worst ones.... they think because you have your bills paid and are doing better financially at that time that they do not owe you the money back.... That does not go over very well with me....
@birdlady41465 (223)
• United States
8 Jan 10
You are so right with the promisary note also one said interest and then if they do not want to pay you they will not borrow it. I like that too. Yes I got the run around yesterday and was covered thank god by someone who did not have to but he did it for us for he knows we needed it and in return I will help him whenever I can. I got his medication at least for 2 weeks and hoepfully my money will be in before needing anything really else. Yes family does do it to you more then anything. Family who have more and still can not pay bills keep acting like I can lose money by keeping them up I put a stop to that and I think they know that now at least I hope they do. Aint been asked for anything for a while so that thing. I just wish if someone owes me and truly do not have it tell me and explain why or tell me when they think they will have it and I will wait if I just know why and about how long. Just like you I know if and when I tell you I have a problem with repaying at time said you understand and are willing to wait a little bit on money as long as they dont act like you are the plauge and avoid you because they owe you. I hate that too when people act that way. I cant wait to get everyone I owe paid back and that is first on my list with my check coming soon.
@EvrWonder (3571)
• Canada
8 Jan 10
First of all, you borrowed the money to them so now they owe you the money back. There is no loan to you. They owe you money is all. Tell them so. That this is no loan, I borrowed you the money when you needed it, now you must pay me back in full.
If this is really driving you crazy, simply write it off and chalk it up as experience. Then never load anyone any more money again.
@strawberrychocodahi (4818)
• Philippines
8 Jan 10
I am sure you have your lessons learned already on what happened to you when people borrow money. Some do pay, some cannot keep their promise. It's not the matter of understanding them on how they alibi about things if they cannot pay, yes you will only get frustrated and crazy as what you have said.
So the thing is, if you let someone borrow money from you, I ask you, do you do this to help a person? or to gain something out of that money if you ask them to give it back with an interest?
Remember that it is still blessed to give than to receive. The money you lend will not be put in vain. You will still be blessed because you lended and help a person. But if the case is that, when a person just used you as an excuse of borrowing because they will just take advantage, well, it is up to you whom to help. You personally will know which one to help and you can discern them.
@birdlady41465 (223)
• United States
8 Jan 10
You have made a good point here it is better to give then recieve. I had my landlord yesterday when I was told I was getting my stuff I needed through another give back to me and that person was not told he had to pay for my stuff but just told to go get it for us. He was thinking the person that owed me was paying for it. Ya right. He didnt have it when it came to paying so my landlord covered it even though he did not have to he chose to help us and I have been returning the favor. I made him supper and make sure he is ok everyday since I been here which has been 6 months and he knows if I got it I will give it to him too. But my friend took advantage of him a few days ago and she never did what she said she would for him so now I am doing it of course he wants to pay me for it but guess what I am doing what should of been done not for getting paid but to fix a mistake a friend did making me look bad really. He does not look at it that way but I do. SO I am going to clean his house for what my friend did to him of not holding her end up to borrowing 40.00 after all it is not that hard of a job to clean his house to begin with. I am writing it up as lost money and lost trust. I will get my money back some how some day but until then he gets nothing. No rides to the hospital either and if hubby goes behind my back and takes him to doctor then he will be lossing too. Some how I will put a stop to helping this person out for he does not need it that is for sure.
@unique16 (1531)
• United States
8 Jan 10
hello,
Yes, I had this happen to me. I was never paid back. The person was very selfish.
I learned my lesson the hardway. Besides friends and family you need to include girlfriends or boyfriends too. You think if you help them you are showing that care and hope they would do the same for you if you are in the same circumstances.
But it does not work. I like previous response sorry I can not help you because you never paid me back the first. awesome response.
Thanks and Have a great day
Sincerely unique16
@megamatt (14292)
• United States
7 Jan 10
I do not loan people money for the reason that I do not pay me back. I used to be a bit more foolish and trusted people but now I am a bit more older and a bit more jaded, so I rarely if ever loan money. Especially considering these people always are asking for me. I remember a conversation that I had with one of these people. They asked me for money. I was a bit frustrated with them at this point and said in a slightly sarcastic way that I would love to help them. There was one problem and that was I could not. I would have had the money if they had paid me back from the last times. I think they got the hint from that conversation and stopped asking. Still its frustrating and these people are not worth my time.
@birdlady41465 (223)
• United States
7 Jan 10
I can see myself saying something like that and they got what they deserved. Only problem in my condition was they had always paid me back and now they seem to never so no more of anything for them. the trust has been lost and all they are doing is hurting there own selves. God has opened my eyes to there thinking what is theres is theres and what is mine is theres no way I work to hard for what I get to just loan to anyone. Lost trust no funds. New moto.
