a friend who wasnt really a friend at all!

United States
January 7, 2010 11:34pm CST
First I want to say Hello all its been a while! So my story begins with a girl i met 11 years ago. She befriended me when I moved to her town. We were friends and everything was just great. Well people grow up and move away. We hadnt seen each other in 5-6 years when we met up again. Now were both married and have kids the same age. We had hung out for about a year when I realized things wernt right. People kept telling us stuff that she told them which was soooo not true. She started lies and rumors about us. It affected our jobs and friends. SO NOT cool! Well I found out from a little birdy that she was doing pills and other drugs. I confronted her at work about it one time. Im her friend and she needed help I thought. I thought all the bull crap was a cry for help maybe. Boy was I wrong. She said she did nothing wrong. She never said nothing. Bla Bla BLA! I told her for the sake of her children that she dosent overdose and die infront of them from all shes doing. She says...and this is typicall of drug addicts....I know what im doing I will be fine! Famouse last words. Well i told her I was disapointed in her and sorry our friendship had come to this. If she needed something...anything she knew I was there. She decided her drugs were more importiant than our friendship. We parted ways and havent talked in 5 months. Now im finding out shes starting MORE Crap!! Believe that! Havent talked to or seen her in 5 months and she feels she needs to spread roumors about us. If she has something to say to me she should come to me! Get this. I saw her daughter who is 5 at the store with her grandma. She ran up to me, grabed me and yelled my name. She was so excited. I huged her and told her i missed her. She so innocently asked me if I was friends with her mom. For her sake I said yes I am hunny why? She says cuz my mom said you back talk her behind her back! OOOO The nerve of that woman! 1...kid shouldnt have a clue about this 2...Shes the one saying crap and spreading lies AND 3....If you have a problem come to ME!! So I guess I have learned the hard way that I had a friend who wasnt really a friend at all!! It sucks a little and I have to suck it up...prides alittle broke. It will heal. One day she will get what she deserves. Karmas a B.... , never forgets, and its after her! Thanx for letting me rant folks!! Appreciate it! Hope you all have a great day!!! ~May The Kisses Of An Angel Cover And Protect You Always~ Copper
3 people like this
11 responses
• Philippines
8 Jan 10
wow.. that is one conniving woman.. now we can easily say that as time flies people change.. maybe when you met her before she just wants to be friends but now she was frustrated that you werent the one who married her.. its very obvious that she digs you but then that aint the right way to do it.. she could have at least confronted you and told you but she chose to stab you in the back and kill herself with her addiction.. tsk tsk tsk.. just ignore it man.. it will all be over soon.. just stay away from her kind of people..
1 person likes this
• United States
9 Jan 10
Hi Theonehush! Yes she is! I dont know what else to do than to back off and let some time pass. My family dosent need to be around it. Thanx for your time! ~May The Kisses Of An Angel Cover And Protect You Always~ Copper
• Philippines
10 Jan 10
hey.. dont mention it.. it was kind of you to listen to my thoughts as well.. goodluck..
@ladym33 (10979)
• United States
9 Jan 10
I have had a couple of friends like that over the years. So glad they are out of my life. People like that are toxic and you are really much better with out her in your life. Next time someone tells you she said something about you, just say, "Oh well, If she thinks she needs to say those things to make her feel better than more power to her, I know the truth, and that is all I want to say about that subject." That way you acknowledge she is telling lies, but you are not saying anything back about her that can get back to her. You will look like the bigger person. If she comes back at you can just say, "I didn't say a thing about you other then acknowlidging your talking bad about me and my not caring." There is not much she can say about that. Remember you are better off without her.
1 person likes this
• United States
9 Jan 10
Hi Ladym! I totally agree. Im not the type to spead lieas and rumors..they hurt worse. I was raised better than that. I have no contact with her or her friends. If I do hear something was said I shrug it off and me and my husband talk about it. I know I can trust him and we work through it. One day she will see what she is and who shes hurt. Untill then Im out! Thanx for your time! ~May The Kisses Of An Angel Cover And Protect You Always~ Copper
• China
9 Jan 10
i am sorry for the friendship for you two, i think she will not be the girl any more, the most important thing in present is her daughter,you should turn to social worker,it's good for her child in the long term
1 person likes this
@kprofgames (3091)
• United States
8 Jan 10
I think it's a love, hate relationship. You love the person she was, but hate her habits. It's hard to turn your back on a person you've known for so long that needs that much help. I think her addiction is more of "I need attention". As said above. The rumors and lies she tells is also her knowing she has a problem and she's hiding behind all these things she's saying as a way of saying "Hey, don't look at me, look at HER". She still is the center of attention because she's a gossip but she's redirecting all the attention as far as a problem because she's creating one for someone else when she lies. I'm sorry, been down that road before. It's like they want to be around you because you are a healthy function person, but then they are jealous too because they can't handle the problems in their own life. I think it's sad that she has to involve her own children in this, friends, work and other people in the community. It really is a cry for help and she doesn't even know it. Rest assure though that the one that speaks the loudest is usually questioned later about what they are saying. You aren't saying anything about her so people have to wake up in time and realise that this woman has issues or a problem.
1 person likes this
• United States
9 Jan 10
Hi Kprofgames! You hit the nail on the head. She wants attention and always has to be the center of it. She spreads lies so that people wont se her for what she does. Make sence? I really want to help her but my family dosent need that in our lives. Thank you for your responce! ~May The Kisses Of An Angel Cover And Protect You Always~ Copper
@bingchen (1119)
• China
9 Jan 10
actually around my friends this people really exist in my life.we have15 years relationship.but it could not take a blow and finally break.i dont know why she always think how to use our relationship to gain what she want,didnt we have real friendship between us?i find that it is very sad for us.maybe it is wrong for us become friends.maybe this lesson can let me know how to select my real friends
1 person likes this
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
8 Jan 10
hello copper, The value of friendship is not concern most in your story,but,the young kids. What kind of attitude she will be teaching those little kids. Granting that you had done backfights/bad things behind her...she doesn't need to tell her kids to confront you or yell at you,and worst,make her kids believed of untrue things. She's not just an unworthy friend,but also a worst mother. Kids should not be involved in any issues that their young minds cannot cope up or understands well. I think,you should be thankful for knowing her,and what kind of a person she is. If,things were getting worst between you and her,it is better to avoid her,and if she still spreads untrue rumors...you can give her some lessons...you can sue her with oral defamation. Sometimes,we need to go beyond limitation just to make a person realize how much damaged she has had done,and also to hope she will realized what wrong she's been doing. Have a good day always
1 person likes this
• United States
9 Jan 10
Hi Jaiho! I know the kids are getting the brunt of it. She dosent pay attention to them like she should and then boasts about How good a mom she is. Ya ok my dog could do better. I know thats mean but unfortunatly true. I have tried to help for a long time and have gotten no where. I have decided for my familys sake to back off and hope she will get help. Thanx for your time! ~May The Kisses Of An Angel Cover And Protect You Always~ Copper
• India
8 Jan 10
Oh man, what a big mess happened with you. I really feel sorry about it, because I have been in such situation and what I have learned from it is that, never ever be very soft and very harsh with women. Be diplomatic and if you are married then you have to very smart with your relationship (friendship) with opposite gender. It is history when people use to believe that women are very sensitive and emotional blah blah. But buddy, they have grown and now there is no difference in terms of emotionality and sensivity between men and women. I hope you have already learned you lesson. One thing which I feel you should without any delay is to let you partner know about this and be faithful to her. Otherwise in future there is a possibility of huge misunderstaning between you. Have a great married life...!
• United States
9 Jan 10
Hi Beacklover! Just to clarify I am a woman. ~May The Kisses Of An Angel Cover And Protect You Always~ Copper
1 person likes this
• India
10 Jan 10
Sorry, I didnt know that. But, even if you are woman. My reply is also for you as it is not gender specific. Just read it once more.
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
10 Jan 10
There's a saying, something like "don't worry about friends you've left in the past, there's a reason they didn't make it to your future"... I think the literal is "people" but well it can be suited for anyone I suppose. I'm sorry that you had such trouble with this woman, and it's sad that she is saying such things so that her little girl can hear. Little kids are very impressionable. They need not hear a lot of things grown ups say and do, but then again I believe a lot of things grown ups say and do shouldn't be said! Of course, I've no room to talk as I can say or do things just as bad as anyone else. In any case, Sometimes you've got to let friends go, and you've realized this. I had a hard time letting friends go when they weren't being very nice. I had the help of my husband and mother in law though. I won't go into it as I don't want to squash your discussion. Have a wonderful day!
• Portugal
8 Jan 10
sad history...=(
• Turkey
8 Jan 10
I had a friendship for over 15 yrs, but it was broken up while I was marrying. She didn't attend my wedding ceremony, as she says she expected to receive an invitation card from me. I was so disappointed in her bec' she was like a sister for me and our apartments were next to each other and she all knew the date and details about the wedding. I really didn't think that she needed an invitation to attend the ceremony!!! I couldn't believe the way she thought about it. She behaved like a stranger..Since then, when we see each other we just say hello and we talk nothing else any more. It was hurting for me at the beginning, but I don't care any more.
• India
8 Jan 10
hiii... its really very sad.she is really a worst mother nd a friend
1 person likes this