Is 3% enough to pay my Ex?

First, if you can lay charges against him for assault, why not do it to begin with? Second, the law is the law. There are things in life worth fighting, and things in life not worth fighting. Before you go into battle, you should do a risk and reward. How much will it cost? How much effort will it take? How much time will you lose? How much a toll will it take on your already harmed family? What are the chances of you actually winning? And even if you by some chance win, will it have been worth all the extra cost? As for whether it's fair, I see an awful lot of girls that bring nothing to a marriage, live with a guy for 3 years, and demand half the assets when they run off with another lover. Had a friend who had a wife who was like some sort of she-devil. Made him miserable. He called it quits, then the real hell started. She fought him over everything, great and small, to take as much from him as she could. Finally after fighting her for over a year, he just caved in, and gave her most of what she wanted. Yeah he could have kept fighting, but as long as he was constantly in court, constantly messing with her endless demands, his life was at a stand still. Yeah it sucked giving that female oger all that stuff, but in the end he had his life back, so it was worth it. Here's another way to look at it. Do not lose 90% of your life, over 7% of your current assets. You may find the trade off to be a bad one.

I have a question. Have you filed for divorced or still separated. If you haven't filed for divorce, and have family or friends. You can give things to them that has money value, and have them returned to you once the divorce is finalized. You can't give 10% of something to someone that you don't have of. If it's property, you can find out the cost to hand it over to a family or friend that is very trust worthy to hand it back over to you once the smoke has cleared. If your daughter is a certain age, you can have her assets put in her name so it belongs to her and not yours. Your laws might be harsh, but we have something like that here. After 10 years of being married, the other is entitled to half of the others belongings. I do hope this helps some. I honestly don't think this is fair, it makes me sick how the bad always gets more than the ones that actually deserve it. You can also talk to him, explain that he either turns down the offer of the money or take the 3%. If not you will not have no choice but to take his a$@ to court and everything he did while married to you will come out like a stain in the wash. You have to dig deep and play dirty. There are always loop holes in everything. I have told my lawyer to find them or I would find one that will. Good Luck.

Hi Jenny, I think that the laws regarding this sort of thing suck because they do not take into consideration the cause of the marriage ending. They were put in place years ago to protect women who might give up good careers and jobs when they married. Often when the marriage failed, the men had reached a decent financial status while the women had spent years caring for the kids, home etc. It was tough for them to get back in the workforce. In those cases it made perfect sense. In yours it makes no sense at all. In my opinion 3% is more than generous. Even if charges are not brought up on the domestic violence, I think you should make it clear in the court that that is why the marriage is ending and also that these are assets that you had long before the marriage. If your ex had an ounce of decency then he would know that none of your assets are really rightly his and he would not accept a thing. The laws suck. Good luck with this and let us know how it all turns out.

well whether it is right or not that's the law am afraid, though I do have sympathy for you as I was in a similar position with my ex wife more mental abuse though than physical she then had numerous affairs etc etc cut a long story short even though she had nothing when we married she eventually walked away with 50% of all the assest's and my house that I made the mistake of adding her name on the deed poll so shes got a large amount of money and she got the house my lawyer had basically said the law is the law, and I could fight it but chances were minimal, and if I fought it the costs would sky rocket. The laws so unfair but the law is the law as I found out to my cost.

OMG are you kidding me. This is horrible that he brought nothing to the marriage, you dealt with domestic violence and you will still have to give him money. That is so not right and I would be fighting this to the bitter end. What a disgrace that where you live you have to deal with such stupidity. This is an outrage. I would definitely be charging him with the assault. I'm in shock over this.

I agree that your ex doesn't deserve 10%. I guess that's why some people have pre-nuptual agreements. It sounds like if you do go to court it might be the best thing. Then you can explain your side and maybe the judge will sympathize with you. It really sounds like you shouldn't have to pay him anything. Good Luck!!

I think you neve pay anything to your ex. If the law say this then male people will marry the rich lady and will seek separation clue and will take assets like this.... This may not be a law that guy will take assets from his wife after separation due to bad nature of a guy Shameless guy can take assets of ex wife ......

In this case I think you are being generous to offer him anything. Let us know how it goes.

I think you are being generous even offering him 3% as you say he brought no assets to your union and especially considering the abuse. I am very stubborn when it comes to what I consider is my right so if I was in your shoes I would fight for my rights and most definitely charge him for the assault as long as the time limitations have not run out. GOOD LUCK!

It sounds as though when you didn't bring charges against him at the time of this domestic violence before,He still has a clean slate...and in that case,Your state's law seems to be on his side,for now,regarding his "entitlement" to your assets.Would putting anything in trust For Your Daughter avoid this? would that bring "Your" assets below this threshold that lets him continue a claim? Personally,I think You're right to contest this Asinine Law!

This doesn't happen in our family law here. What ever properties acquired before marriage or inherited properties, the other party cannot lay a claim. Only properties gained during the marriage are to be divided on separation or divorce. I think your family law is not fair and should be contested to nullify any claims. It is not justifiable to give when it is not shared properties acquired during marriage.

there is no way i'd pay alimony-especially if i have custody. that's just an additional slap in the face. i'd let it go to court myself.

Why wait? Go ahead and charge him with assult. Or it may appear to the courts that you are prssing assult charges because you were made to pay him. I dont think you should have to pay his. All these kinds of things just strenghtens me to remain single for ever.

This is the most ridiculous thing i have ever heard of. Is your ex disabled? Can he work or what is the problem. In my country, if you get divorced, for whatever reason, the men end up paying or in most cases, each go there seperate way and do not bother each other, accept if there are children involved, then there has to be an agreement on maintanance for the children. This is plain nonsense. I wish i could tell you to tell him to take a hike to the warm place. It is a very akward situation. Maye you should declare yourself bancrupt, then he will leave you alone. Good Luck.

The law is an A*ss. Moreover, your ex is a police man, and the police guys usually stick with their own. Since the law is not on your side, go for a compromise, if he does not agree for 3% go for 5 to 7%.This will be better than going to the court. and end up paying a lot of legal costs.I really pity you, but what can we common people do, when the law is against us.

I can't believe you have to pay him no matter what. I hope he accepts your 3% offer. It might be worth that just to get rid of him. I don't know about the laws in your country but here we have a thing called a statue of limitations which means we can't file anything against anyone if it happened over a year ago. May be you could add your daughter's name to your assets and you be a like a benefic1ary. That way the things you meant for her are hers and maybe this will help them to be untouchedYou would still have control of it until she was 18. Good luck and keep us updated.

i am sorry to hear about your situiation and do not have idea how to help. maybe you can consult other lawyer's opinion.

I don't quite understand your law . Well i do think if your ex is good enough he would respect all your decision because it's his fault to seperate this family. Now he seems no good therefore just let the court to decide who should have these assets. Just move on and hope that you will have a bright future.

It seems absolutely assenine that you should be expected to give him anything is you were the one that brought everything into the marriage. But then, that is also why there are so many people in today's day and age that have prenuptial agreements. If the law states that you have to give him ten percent, I don't think you are going to be able to find any way around it. You should be very glad that you don't live here were everything coming out of a marriage is split straight down the middle.

Sorry to hear about your bad experience. Sometimes the matrimonial law is not so reasonable, and it just can't be 100% reasonable. They considered your ex is poorer than you, maybe that's the reason for you to give 10%. If he maltreated you, then you can bring him to court and let him compensate you. Does your lawyer not want to give you fair treatment? Nowadays, with the marriage system less and less reasonable, people figured out it is important to notarize their assets before marriage, so there won't be any argument when they divorce. You see, already think of divorce at beginning of marriage! It is really bad marriage experience to you, maybe just use your assets to buy some peaceful life. I also heard in some divorce cases in USA, if the man is richer, he has to give 50% of his assets to his ex wife... that's even more terrible. Anyway, good luck to you and take care.