Do you have bad self-esteem?

As with most people, I am a crazy mixture; sometimes almost wallowing in low self esteem, but sometimes on a high, and usually somewhere in between. I was extremely abused for the first 22 years of my life. Every day, and often many times a day, I was told I was an UGLY FREAK. I was totally EVIL and no one would ever want me, so I might as well do the world a favour and kill myself. This was so ingrained in me that I had NO friends. I KNEW everyone hated me. Yet part of me must have rebelled because I was a high achiever. I topped the school academically. I won many prizes at school, and also in art and writing competitions. I gained promotions quickly when I started work - but I was still friendless and I was a definite man hater. My whole life changed dramatically when I was 22 years old and I became a totally different person. Two years later I married and have been very happily married to the most wonderful man for almost 50 years. Those 50 years have been wonderful and marked with very many achievements. So, back to self esteem. I have every reason to enjoy a high self esteem. I am amazed when I think of major achievements in my life. I look back and wonder how on earth I did a number of things - and how, at 73 I am still achieving amazing things. I KNOW I accomplish much. On the other hand, as for ME, as a PERSON, I often think I am worthless.

I'm sort of anti-social. I don;t like being around people much. I get a little paranoid around large groups. I always feel as if they're staring at me. Or staring right through me. I guess I can attribute that to having low self-esteem.

I don't think i do but who knows. I have probably faked it alot. I have always been a pretty strong person but have had some very low times in my life when i'm sure my self esteem wasn't where it should have been.

hi...this is a wonderful discussion!! yes..there the self -esteem really inportant for veryone....and i also a high self-esteem person now .it is valuable for me.remember i was in high scholl in my mind no existed about any self -esteem the concept....also better now!!!...

i have low self-esteem so i'm not interacting with the other people coz i think that i am a loser..

I feel I have a high self esteem, but these days, it's been getting lower and lower because of issues around me. I still have confidence to speak my mind but I don't feel that good about myself all the time anymore. Things seem to get harder when you start getting older, but I try to see the bright side of things and continue trying to hold me head high and do my best with everything :)

When I was a teen I had HORRIBLELY low self esteem that started when I was a child thanks to my so called parents....I still have bouts of low self esteem but its generally when I have a bad episode with my depression OR they will follow communication with my mother....for the most part though I love me and am cool with me ya know..Unfortunatley with all the disorders I have, those spurts of "omg I hate me" etc etc are bound to happen.. I agree that many kids today suffer with it and I have to say that its IMO partly because so many of them are latch key kids without attentive parents AND society is demanding too much on the youth of today..

No I don't. I am not really prideful but my self esteem is not too bad at all.

Well I guess you would have to ask me at different times LoL! As I mentioned in a previous responder I am bi-polar so in my lows I would say my self esteem is almost non existant, but in my highs I feel good and can look at myself in the mirror with an ok attitude. I wouldn't say I have a high self esteem, so I guess I'm medium to low. Events in a persons life can also have a lot to do with ones self esteem! Between past events, disorders, and insecurities my self esteem isn't the greatest! Hope that made sense!

I don't think I really have good self-esteem or bad self-esteem, so I guess I'm in the middle also. I have a lot of confidence when I need to, but I definitely don't think I'm anything special. I think I have the most self-esteem I've had in a long time right now. There is something about being pregnant that just makes you blossom and feel happy.

Hi ambie, I did have an extremely bad self-esteem when I was younger what with the zits and the stick figure etc. etc. It's probably the reason I chose the bad-for-me husbands that I did. My esteem grew stronger with time and getting thru over and beyond things in my life. At 53, I'm at a point where I don't worry so much about on what others think as I used to. I still get sensitive tho. I think that's just who I am and thats ok too.

Right now I guess I'm at a low in the self-esteem department. I'm getting to a point where I don't feel I fit in anymore where the job market is concerned. It's been awful trying to compete with the younger generation, and no one wants to pay decent wages anymore for experience. They'd rather have a pretty young face to look at instead. I'm trying to keep my self-esteem up but it's very hard right now at this point, after months of getting kicked around in the job market which I'm sure brings alot of people down who had high hopes. All I want to do is work and provide for myself, which at this point seems like an impossibility.

hi ambiepam when I was younger I had poor self esteem but my husband made me think well of myself and I became sort of 'in the middle. He made me think of myself as unique one ofa kind and that was really helpful. Now here we have a mental fitness class for awhile yet,its going bye bye come February but it has really built up my self esteem as I seem to ace every exercise and every challenge. I am more creative more imaginative and write better than ever before and now i do have good self esteem.I am somebody, I am unique, I like myself. and that feels very good to me.

hello, Ambiepam.:-) I can say that I have a high self esteem no matter how people tried to put me down especially the people who I trust and love so much. There were times, out of a desperate situation, I had my moments of self pity, but the high self esteem that I regarded myself with saved me from further misery I don't socialize much but this doesn't mean I am shy or not confident enough to do so. I'd rather mind my own business than wasting my time over socializing. But, I do have a life, of course. Got friends to talk and hang with whenever I want to. I'd say that my self esteem comes from the idea that I can be productive, effective, even beautiful and sexy if only I will believe I am. :-) I hope I don't sound too conceited.

I'm not exactly sure whether i have bad or good self-esteem. Self-esteem is how we view ourselves, how worthy we think we are. I guess I'm somewhere in the middle. I'm not the type who is very talkative kind of person. Sometimes we feel bad about ourselves, while at some other time we feel very high of ourselves. Our self esteem cannot be maintained at certain level. It changes over time. We might we thinking bad of ourselves right now and have low self esteem. But once we learn from a mistake, it will come back to normal again. The only thing to keep in mind is this..."Mistakes are the building blocks of experience, it is the foundation through which skill sets are built"

I have pride. My pride is like this, I can't give up my job. I don't want to joined the world of call center because my job is not related to it, but truly my job cannot help me survive in this world. My job can't help me to make my dreams come true, but call center company can. I have pride. I believe that call center is not my forte, I don't have skills on that kind of job. But many swallow their pride, they enter call center jobs because there is money there. We need money too buy what we need, so them, they do anything just to have money. I don't have the guts because I have pride. If you really look at it there is nothing bad switching for my work to call center, but the thing is, you are not applying the skills,experience and what you learn from your degree. That is the only bad self-esteem i have.

I have good self-esteem....I used to have low self-esteem but one thing I have learned as I have gotten older. The things that used to be important or have an effect on how I felt about myself or my life not longer matter. I really don't care if I am "in" wearing the right shoes or clothes. I don't care of someone doesn't like my hair etc...I find that I am also less judgemental about others as I have grown older....so that is definately a plus!

Hi AmberPam. At one point in my life I did have low-self esteem. When I was younger I always thought that material things were important and those nice material things that I did not have alone with knowledge of knowing how to get them made me in a lower class than some of the people that I was associating with. I had to work so that my children was provided for so that left me with not much for myself. My friends would make fun of me when I did get something new. They would make statements like "She must have gotten her income tax refund, because she has on a new pair of jeans", I couldn't party with them much because I had to work and pay a sitter for my kids, I didn't have anyone to sit with them while I partied. These things and more made me have this low self-esteem now that I know those things aren't important. My life is much better and I am at peace. I give all the glory to God. To this day I feel wonderful just going to church serving God and sitting at home reading, studying or doing whatever my heart desire. P.S. and what brought all this on was the fact that I was motherless from the age of 12 years, brought up by relatives, that really didn't care or give me the provision that I needed. I can say that I was an orphan. Life is good now. I have no bitterness. Just Love for all.

I grew up with a very low self esteem due to an emotionally abusive up bringing and it has taken me years to acknowledge the damage my parents did to my sense of worth. Now that I am an adult an aware of my issues I can be more realistic about the way I see myself and appreciate that I am okay just the way I am. I would consider myself middle of the road when it comes to self esteem.

i have a very low self-esteem. my family even says so. i am usually locked up in my room reading books or surfing the net. i don't like to talk that much and other people think i'm mysterious.