building up my marriage

well i am not at all married but i can say that when you are married you should take the responsibility to build it up propo]erly.infact both the partners should take this responsibility otherwise you should harm your future.... in the future if you have kids it will affect them and aggrivate their respect to their parents and it will only get worsen...

I know exactly what you mean. When I get in a fight with my man, the words i say are absolutely horrible. I do not do it on purpose, things just tend to come out. i am lucky that we are so in love that we have made it through some very hard things. But I am also afraid that if i keep up with the things I say and do, I am going to lose him. All I do is try very hard to just bite my tounge. It is not even that he is doing something wrong. I have been hurt a lot in the past and I guess when we fight I take advantage that he would never hurt me and hurt him instead. I am trying very hard not to do this anymore. Good luck to you and your marriage.

hello spoiled, Whatever the cause of your bad words or saying bad words to others,only you knows the answer why you are doing it. Maybe you are too impulsive without weighing things before uttering words,and regretting it after. The good thing here is,you've come to realize about your mistake. And,it's not too late to start all over again. You can start by saying sorry to your husband and to all people that you've hurt by your bad words. I know your husband understands you,the main reason why he's still with you,becoz,he knows you(you doesn't mean whatever you've said)and loves you more than you'll ever knew. Try to control your emotions and surely,you will slowly learned to mellow with your emotions. Have a good day always and happy weekend

I know what you mean. I tend to say hurtful words when I'm mad, especially to my husband. The things is, my husband wouldn't say a word when we are having a discussion and his silence only makes me more angry. I always regret it as soon as it comes out of my mouth but I can't help it. But as soon as I have cooled down, I always make it a point to apologize to him.

And how do you feel after throwing those hurtful words to your husband? Does it satisfy you? Are you happy after saying those words to him? I do not know the reason behind your marriage, was it because both of were so in love with each other before or yours was a marriage due to unexpected pregnancy? However, since we both live in the same country and everybody knows that there is no divorce here and annulment is very costly and a long process, I suggest that you have to live up with your marriage. What you should do is to control first you temper and try to talk with your husband what ever is the reason why you are nagging. You won't be a good example to the eyes of your child if you have one. Nothing can't be remedied by constant communication and understanding each other. Both of you should also consult an older member of your family or go to a marriage counsellor for counselling. I hope you will do something to save and build your marriage, I am really against broken families, as much as possible, because I pity the children that is the most affected with the situation. God Bless.

I have also been married for about 3 years now. And I find myself doing the same thing sometimes to my husband. I catch myself being hurtful to my husband. And he has never said a hurtful word to me in all our time together. My biggest issue with this is apologizing. It is quite hard and I need to pray that God will give me the strength to do so. Congratulations on trying to make your marriage last and work. A God filled marriage is the best!

Its not yet too late to change from our wrong directions. from now on, just have a firm control, try to think back and hold back always before you utter some words to your husband or anyone. Remember that what comes from our mouth usually are products of our heart, so don't spread hatred and anger, it will just pro-long the devil's smile. I know you are a good wife, but you only have to discipline your own temper. To get mad and to keep shouting not too pleasing words, won't do you any good. it will just lead you into a wrong direction and can complicate things. Never wait that one day, you will have to lost every dear ones for you to remain awake. God is so loving for those who will repent whole heartedly.

If you really love your husband and you think that your marriage is important to you, then do control yourself, and be careful not to say anything hurting towards him. In my opinion, only wives who are angry and dissatisfied with their husband's have the right to say things especially during an agrument, because it sometimes helps the couple to realize what's going on with their relationship. But if you say that you are that committed to your husband and marriage, then I really advice you to stop. But I wonder, why is it very easy for you to say such hurtful words? Maybe there's something inside you that wants to be released, but you are just denying it. Reflect and know within yourself where those hurting words are coming from. There is something deep inside you that is bothering you...