he is so possesive...HELP!!!
By felliana
@felliana (114)
Philippines
January 25, 2010 2:33am CST
my husband! ugh! it bother me alot... i can't move without his permission. what can i do with this? he's been away for almost 2 years, now that he's back, he don't want me to be out of his site. deep in me i love it, i know he love me much but then sometimes, this irritates me. i have my own life too, i have something to do with my own too, that don't need much of his attention? what will i do with this? how can i make him calm...i need help, any suggestions?
love to hear from you, thanks!
happy lotting",)
1 person likes this
5 responses
@rosepedal64 (4188)
• United States
25 Jan 10
I noticed that you didn't say what the cause of him being away for 2 years. It sounds like that he is just so thankful to have you back into his life that he is afraid that he will lose you again. I agree that you do need to sit him down and tell him just how much he is doing. Be gentle with him, you don't want him to leave you alone totally. Good luck and let us know how it works out for you.
Keep smiling.
1 person likes this
@felliana (114)
• Philippines
23 Feb 10
hello there, oh i forgot to mentioned that he's been away for 2 years working abroad, in Qatar. as i 've been staying here alone, and while he's away, i've been used to work with my own, walk alone to my friends for a little chit-chat and sometimes i have this little business that needs time to time meeting with friends...and when he came back there i felt i was into prison, he hooked me up, he don't want me to go alone, to go without him, and that irritates me...and also he was so jealous of all my friends, ohmigosh!
anyway, i took one of the advises here and yeah we did alot of talkings until the time he accept the fact that i did not make any jokes to our relationships. and so far so good, he started to loosen up and now i able to walk alone to any place i would go...thanks god!
thanks for the reply, happy lotting!
@mjcookie (2271)
• Philippines
25 Jan 10
The best way is to talk things out. Maybe he doesn't know that he is already being so possessive, so you have to tell him your feelings about that. If he hears what you've got to say, he will eventually realize his mistakes. Don't let those feelings build up inside you. For your relationship to be harmonious you have to communicate with each other.
I hope this helps. ;)
1 person likes this
@felliana (114)
• Philippines
23 Feb 10
hi there, yeah right! i took your advice and somehow it works. oh well it did really! he's beginning to loosen his being possessive on me now, and i like it! now i can go to any place i wanted without his chaperon, like going to friends to have some little chit-chat, to my old home or to the market etc. etc.
actually he's been away for two years working abroad, in Qatar, and then when he went home, he's begun jealous to all my friends, he started to do think bad 'bout them, he don't want me to go out without him, that irritates me alot, i've been used without him to all my walks for two years then just one day when he came he started to hook me up oh...but so far so good, he's okey now. he accept the fact already that i really don't have other men beside him for two years. thanks God!
thank you for the advice, happy lotting!
I hope everything turns out really well.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
25 Jan 10
hi felliana being overly possessive and not wanting a wife
to go anywhere unless he says so is the number one step in a man advancing to being a wife batterer, I would remind him that I do not want to be in jail, that he has to trust me or else there is no love , not real love.Also tell him that a wife batterer begins by trying to make his wife his prisoner,if he truly loves you it will shock him to know this.If he has been gone that long then he needs to readjust to being with you, but thats not your fault. do not let him make you his prisoner and if he lays one hand on you, call a battered womans shelter. no woman deserves to be physically abused or mentally abused, what he is doing right now is called mental abuse. Keeping you in prison is not love it is a power play, call him on this. if he truly loves you he will want to change his behavior, if he does not then look out.
@mackiejp (374)
• Philippines
9 Mar 10
We almost have the same experience girl, my husband is a sailor that travels around the world, and when he is around he don't want me to be out of his sight for so long, he is like more of my shadow but I understand him why, he just want to fill up the moments when we are apart, yes as wives we want to grow separate from them, but just consider those moments when you were apart as your own moment to do what exactly you want for yourself, and since you are together now enjoy his company and give him what exactly he wants, if you are that submissive to your husband then it is easy for you to adjust.We have all the time for ourselves when we are apart from them...
@swissheart (6482)
• Romania
8 Oct 15
I sorry to hear that. have you ever tried to have an honest conversation in which you would explain him these things?
