Never underestimate your internet personality!
By dragon54u
@dragon54u (31634)
United States
January 29, 2010 9:11am CST
We've all heard of internet bullies and the pain they cause, but have you ever thought about the influence you have just being yourself? Your internet friends are something you might take for granted but you can make a big difference in someone's life.
I was thinking last night about a friend I had long ago, Liam Burke. I met him on a guitar forum and "knew" him for years. He always had a kind word for me, flirted with me shamelessly but never crossed the line and encouraged me as I went through a bad marriage as well as the frustrations of learning to play my guitar. There were days that were very bad for me and he could always insert a little ray of sunshine in my day. When I felt unloved and alone I could always remember a little something Liam had said to make me smile. He helped me through a very bad time in my life and I know that he didn't realize how he brightened those dark days for me.
Sadly, he died a couple of years ago of cancer. He'd signed off the net for the most part a year or two before that, having met and married a lovely lady and moved to a different country. I wish he could have known how he helped me.
Is there some internet personality that you've never met that has made your life more bearable or better? Do you make a real effort to be a ray of sunshine to the people you meet on the internet? I know I have a few friends here on myLot and other places that make me laugh and encourage me. Do you?
4 people like this
19 responses
@mentalward (14690)
• United States
29 Jan 10
Yep! Right here in myLot. There are some really terrific people here and some of them stand out for always being there.
I've known several people over the years who always had a kind, inspiring or just friendly word for me when I was feeling low.
The internet may have brought out all the perverts and deviants in the world but it has also opened the gates for the big-hearted, genuinely kind people to shine.
I do make an effort to help people through rough times. I totally believe that what goes around, comes around. The people who complain the most about people in general being selfish or thoughtless are normally themselves selfish and/or thoughtless.
Attitudes are contagious and I like to spread good ones.
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
29 Jan 10
I have heard so much about the bad people on the net that I thought I would bring the good ones to the attention of as many as possible!
Are you ready for the storm? Oklahoma has declared a state of emergency before the storm even hits and your state is supposed to have the most snow in 20 years. If you're not prepared to be snowbound for awhile, hurry out and get supplies! I hope you stay warm and cozy, I'll be thinking about you!
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
29 Jan 10
I'm glad to here you won't be slammed! We haven't had a really bad winter so far, but February and March are our biggest snow months. It's COLD!! 11° right now and it's noon so it won't get much warmer. I was really cold last night while the dogs and I were watching the idiot box so I checked the thermostat and it was 61°! I don't know how it fell from 66° to that but luckily the furnace was okay.
I recall your saying that your hubby was hard on his vehicles. Mine used to be, too. Our mechanic could always tell when he drove the car or truck and from what I hear, he still gets a lot of business from him!
@mentalward (14690)
• United States
29 Jan 10
WHEW! I just checked with Weather.com and saw that we are only going to be getting the northernmost part of this storm system. Southern Virginia will get hit hard but we're in the northern tip of Virginia.
I'm hoping the worst of winter is over for us. We got hit hard in December (over 5 feet of snow total) but it hasn't been too bad this month. We've had a lot of days when it snowed this month but usually it didn't stick around. It has usually just been flurries or showers.
1 person likes this
@savypat (20216)
• United States
29 Jan 10
This is why we must let kindness guide us in all words we say. The golden rule of do unto others and you would have them do unto you can never fail us. Another thing of value is to express your thanks as often as possible, who knows when you will have another chance. Blessings and thanks for the very nice story
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
29 Jan 10
You are right, we can lose someone in the blink of an eye. Let me take this chance to say I appreciate you!
@GreenMoo (11834)
•
8 Feb 10
It was people on the internet who gave me the confidence to live the life that I now do. I don´t think it was anyone specific, but a group of people on an internet forum with similar ideas convinced me that I wasn´t mad or unreasonable to want more from my life than I was getting at that stage. And here I am! And I still use that forum. Maybe something I say one day will make a difference to someone else.
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
8 Feb 10
You already make a difference. I have laughed at things you've said, sometimes months after I've forgotten them. I think of you sometimes when I'm being thrifty, how you achieved what you have now and all the hard work you've done and it inspires me. The internet can be a wonderful thing and we can reach around the world without leaving our chairs!
@GreenMoo (11834)
•
11 Feb 10
That´s a lovely comment, and I´m touched. MyLot (for me at least) doesn´t have the same sense of community as some of the forums I´ve used, so it´s particularly nice to find someone here who´s views I generally accord with and who seems to be on the same wavelength.
1 person likes this
@Sandra1952 (6047)
• Spain
31 Jan 10
Hello, Dragon - what a great discussion. I have made some wonderful friends here on MyLot, and several of them have made a real difference to my life. They brighten up the day, and they're there with support when I'm going through a bad time, as I am right now. My face lights up when I see a message from them, or a response or comment, because I know it will be well worth reading. I've learned so much about other countries as well.
I would not want to be without my special internet friends. I try to return the favour by making interesting responses and sharing details of my life with them. I hope they appreciate my efforts as much as i appreciate theirs.
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
1 Feb 10
Our internet friends really do light up our days! I, too, try to respond to as many as land in my mailbox. I have a real fondness for my myLot friends!
@EmberSilence (22)
• United States
30 Jan 10
I've only recently joined mylots, but I do have a friend that I will always remember. I only knew them as Eots, and we talked and exchanged poetry online. He helped me through so much, and he was funny and insightful. Don't know what happened to him.
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Welcome to myLot!
There are several internet friends that I've fallen out of touch with. I can usually find anyone, but these people completely fell off the grid. At least I didn't find obituaries. I hope your friend thinks of you sometimes. Even if they are only in our lives for a short time, friends are such treasures.
@EmberSilence (22)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Thank you! I adore friends. I don't get many of them, though. I'm sort of a shy person when I am around people.
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
26 May 11
This is a great community. There are several people here that don't know that they make me laugh sometimes or teach me something. We never know if we're making someone's day better so we should always be on our most civil behavior.
@GardenGerty (160488)
• United States
30 Jan 10
The friendships I have in the forums I am on are what keep me coming here, and I have learned so much from the people here, especially on MyLot. I think that my relationships make me put forth my better self.
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
30 Jan 10
That's true! When we have friends on the internet places we hang out at, we're much less likely to show our bad side and I think that makes us better people.
@zed_k4 (17589)
• Singapore
29 Jan 10
I'm so sorry for what had happened to your late best friend. For me, it would have to be my late grandma. I really miss her a lot, but I know she's in a better place and I always pray that she will go to Heaven. Sorry for being a bit spiritual there. I can relate to this totally. In life, there will be a few people that will touch our hearts and minds so much that when they are gone, we are left with their good memories, great advices and unending love-feel.
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
29 Jan 10
Yes, your grandma is in a better place and she'll be waiting for you when it's your time to cross over. I'm so glad that you had someone like that. I miss my grandma even though she's been gone for over 30 years!
We all need people to love and to love us and sometimes one or two of those are on the internet. We can make a difference that we might never know about!
1 person likes this
@zed_k4 (17589)
• Singapore
31 Jan 10
Thanks for that, my friend. I hope I can 'meet' her someday too, in Heaven. All of us have our fair share of love ones, and 30 years? That's quite a long time already...I think mine's not that long anyway and I can imagine how much you must have missed her too. Internet friends are just as awesome as friends outside. Providing a relief breather for me so that I won't think about all this sadness and missing emotions.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 Mar 10
yes,most of my best friends have been on the net. in fact i do have a lot here on mylot that help me and make me feel loved. Back years ago when i belonged to a group on the net that wrote prisoners, i met (virtually) a lady that ive been friends with for 14yrs now. we email each other, we've spoken on the phone, we've post mailed each other, but never met face to face. still we have supported each other emotionally for this many years. you have also been a very good personal friend. besides you, there are at least 4 very good friends on here i've even wished i could live near so we could see each other on a daily or at least weekly basis
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
11 Mar 10
It would be fun to meet myLot friends, wouldn't it? But until someone invents a free transporter, it's beyond our means. It's amazing the impact one can have just by typing a few words and caring about people.
@coffeegurl (1467)
• United States
10 Mar 10
I have a lot of friends like that on second life. It's a great online game community. But it's not a game, really. It's like the SIMS on acid, kinda. I have a friend who lives in Mexico and he is going to college now. I had been worried about him because I hadn't seen his avatar in over 3 months. Turns out he was just busy with school.
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
10 Mar 10
Isn't it strange how people can touch us so deeply when we've never met them? I have a friend I haven't "seen" for a few months now. He has a brain tumor so I'm more concerned than normal. I hope he's okay, I think about him sometimes and wonder if he's okay. No obituaries with his name, though, so I assume he's taking one of his occasional sabbaticals from the internet. I have a lot of internet friends that have influenced my life in positive ways.
@bingchen (1119)
• China
30 Jan 10
i dont meet this friends online really concerned with my life.although there are a lot of people communicate each other online.but real relationship it seems few.of course i hope that i meet thie friends who can care me and encourage me.but there are people who use internet and cheat others is too much.i dont believe the real friendship exist.maybe i would cheat by them.it seems that i would find this good friends online like i find the needle in the sea.
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Maybe you're not in the right places. If you have a hobby you love and are involved in a message board that concerns it, you often get to know people better than at someplace like this. Even here, with all the people that interact, there are a few that I would be very upset about if anything bad happened to them. There are many good people on the net but you don't meet them in places where you go to earn money, generally. Friendship blossoms from common interests.
@Janey1966 (24170)
• Carlisle, England
30 Jan 10
Firstly, let me say how sorry I am that your internet friend is no longer around. So sad However, your topic for discussion has reminded me that I hadn't emailed my "internet friend" since before Christmas! So I have made amends. His name is Paul and I "knew" him even before I met John (my hubby) online. He is very supportive and can be a laugh at times but has been very unlucky in love (tends to go for ladies A LOT younger than himself) so I'm hoping that his reply will tell me he's found someone. I do hope so, he's a lovely man. Thanks for reminding me to email him! I'd forgotten all about it.
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
30 Jan 10
I can be bad about that, too! I have a mini-minder on my desktop and I have it set to remind me each week to contact different friends, most real-world but some virtual. It's not because I don't think of them because I do, I just get all involved in everyday life and the long list of things to do every day! I hope your friend has found someone. I decided after my divorce that I was done with all that and I feel much better for it!
Friends like that are priceless!
@Janey1966 (24170)
• Carlisle, England
30 Jan 10
Well, I didn't get married until I was 42. Paul is a little older but there's still time for him yet, I'm sure!
1 person likes this
@mlno054321 (212)
• Philippines
30 Jan 10
i don't underestimate my internet personality because in internet you can pretend or hide your true personality so the person knowing you in your personality that is she/he going to believe, even if its not true. so that's true don't underestimate the internet personality.
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
30 Jan 10
That is true, you can present a different person that what you really are. Some people do that with great success, but it's better to be yourself--at least, I believe so.
@Mady2791 (545)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Well..yes I have tried to be that voice of encouregement in the past and tried overlook some traits that person may show online that I don't necessarily agree with or like. I have also have tried to make people feel good by making them laugh(enjoy to do that a lot).
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
30 Jan 10
I see you're new here, welcome!
When you give someone a smile or make them laugh, that goes into your spiritual bank account. As well as saving up good "karma", making someone else's day brighter does the same for you! Keep up the good work.
@sharone74 (4837)
• United States
29 Jan 10
Yes there are a lot of people out there like that. A lot of people don't think of internet people as real friends but they are. People on sites like this often never know how much they touch your heart and make you feel like you're not quite so all alone and like you're heard. When it seems you don't have a friend in the world or when your friends have heard all of your stories and commentary and then you come on to mylot and read some of the discussions and you recognize that people are just people everywhere. It reminds you that at our core we are all the same. And sometimes that ray of light is the light of the knowledge that someone out there cares, that someone recognizes our struggles and cares about their outcomes.
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
29 Jan 10
I think the internet is great that way! Everyone I interact with on the net, I think of as a real person with feelings. I think most of us are that way, there are so many good people on the net. I really enjoy all the people here on myLot!
@KrauseHome (36448)
• United States
1 May 11
Sorry to hear of someone that you found so much respect in having to die of Cancer. I know over the yrs, I have met many wonderful people and even had a chance to chat and talk with some of them. A couple of them I can say I have had the pleasure to meet. But then the ones that have been a Big help and friend when something happens like Cancer and they do pass on it can leave a little piece of you behind as well. We just need to realize no matter what happens each person we meet, even here in myLot will take a little piece of us when they're gone.
@whiteheather39 (24403)
• United States
29 Jan 10
Yes I do and this has never been more obvious to me as the support, prayer and advice from some of my myLot friends who really helped me through a few really painful and worrying times in my life.
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
29 Jan 10
Some people say that the internet is ruining real communication but look how much it's helped you and me. If not for Liam, things would have been much worse in my life and you find laughter and support from our myLot family, as do I. I think the internet has enhanced socialization for those who want it and allowed those who prefer isolation to have social contact yet retain their privacy.
@wildcatsthree (289)
• United States
29 Jan 10
I'm so sorry you lost your internet buddy that you became so close to. How very sad. I met a friend a few years ago when we both started blogging, and our friendship has grown way past helping each other on our blogs. Most times we don't even talk about blogging anymore, but we've grown to know each other's family life, interests, pets, etc. I have learned so much about living in another part of the country that I would never have experienced otherwise. I feel we are close friends, and we open up to each other in a way I never do with people I see face to face, yet I have never met her and probably never will becasue of the distance we live from each other. I have comforted her through hard times in her life and she has done the same for me. We have a strange and wonderful friendship thanks to the wonders of the internet.
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
29 Jan 10
I have lost others I became close to on the net, one from colon cancer and another from an accidental overdose, both truly great musicians and wonderful people. They are sorely missed by many!
The guitar forum where I met these fine people is full of friends who've hung out together for over ten years. We get together and some even travel across the country on vacations or business trips. None of us would ever have to pay for a hotel if we would pass through another's state! I love my internet friends, here and over there at the guitar place. It's a truly wonderful way to reach out and touch peoples' lives and let them influence ours.
@p1kef1sh (45681)
•
29 Jan 10
Gosh yes. Lots including you. I am mostly on here and there are so many people who have come into my life and cheered, encouraged, cajoled, carried, laughed, cried and spanked me. I have a few friends that are simply part of my routine. We talk every day, several times a day by e mail or skype. I belonged to a site for people experiencing depression, stress and anxiety once. But the problem was that they were all depressed, anxious or stressed! It made me even worse than I already was! I'm naming no names, but thank you all. I'm a happier chappy and it's all down to you!
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
29 Jan 10
I'm glad to hear that! I think there are so many more good people on the internet than crappy ones who spread viruses and stuff. I look at myLot as a kind on internet family, much like that guitar forum I mentioned.
And you--you make me giggle. I just love a good laugh and some days don't have much to laugh about sometimes. You would have made a good writer for the Monty Python Flying Circus. I was delighted to find re-runs of it on one of my free channels and I can watch it daily if I like!