eldest daugther

your discussion topic is as familiar as it gets... dyosaakira, i am a father and i have a daughter, just about your age and she's my eldest. i think, she also feels that way, especially when she was in the university... so, i gave her a deal. once she finishes her studies, she can have her life... it's painful you know... the letting go part... but, as kids, you only feel the restrictions, never the implications... i even helped her get a room... and she hardly comes home, even after i have a new house built and gave her the room with a veranda... but that's supposed to be our role as parents... we love our children, no one can contest that... and quietly, we hope that our love is reciprocated... be patient....

I guess this is the way all the eldest daughters will be feeling or I can say that I am feeling the same as u. Many times I felt so angry when I wont be able to do something I really want to do just because I am not allowed to act that way. Its so ridiculous. And when the younger ones live so with no pressure on them n no expectations it sometimes makes me jealous. Many times I have felt to just not obey and do all that i wish to do. Bud i do not know why am not able to do. I guess if we want or not the responsibility of being the eldest is given to those who can follow it well.

My eldest brother is the most stubborn and hard headed in the family and I am the one who i next to him so they expect that my brother wont have a good future. So I took over hi place as being the eldest of the family. And it is hard because they expect me to be great, be what they want me to be and could provide more for my family.

I can feel you. I'm also the eldest in my family. We do have certain responsibilities heavier than most of our siblings. That is why I seek to go places far from home. Don't get me wrong. I love home. Just that I can't be myself there. I suggest you get a job away from home or study in a college or university in another city or state. Then fight for it. Fight for your freedom. Defend it.

I really understand how you feel. I'm also the eldest in our family. They really have high expectations from me.. and every time I have conflicts with my younger siblings, my mother always tell me to understand my sister because I'm the eldest and should be more considerate towards her. Isn't it annoying sometimes? But there's also some benefits you get if you're the eldest. You also get the chance to participate in decision making.. Like once we plan to go out for dinner, they let me choose what restaurant to go. There's a lot more you can get for being the eldest. Now, I'm used to being the eldest daughter and I got to enjoy the benefits for being one.

Ya i feel same as you and i am the eldest from my family and my mom and my uncle always give me lots of expectation coming around me ......i feel like to cry and shout at them but i cant do that also.......some time i have to sacrifice my on things....what to do being eldest and some time i just ignore it and let them

It never really bothered me. I had more responsibilities than my younger siblings but I also could do more things than they could.

I am also the eldest daughter. But I come from a family of only two kids and I am the only girl. I've come to accept all the pressure my family puts on me to succeed, to excel. My brother has yet to realize how heavy a burden that is. Soon, he will come into his own share of responsibilities. When that happens, I'll feel as if we're on even ground. But for now, yeah, I do feel it's unfair. But it's something I have to live with, you know?

Yes I experienced the same as you do even I'm not the eldest. It seems I am the eldest because of the situation in our house. It really hurts me when my mom always get mad at me because that and this and that blah blah blah.. Even I did the best that I can she always get mad at me and I am already 23 years old yet I cannot go out without her permission and I need to get home early. I felt and always comes in my mind that maybe I'm not a real daughter of my parents because of what my mom doing to me. But sometimes she is nice to me and give things I want and I still love her even she act like that to me. And I always contradict negative thoughts that always comes in to my mind that I owe my mom my life and my parents really do whatever they can just to let all of us to finish our studies. Still it hurts for us that they didn't see what we are doing just to make them proud.

Being an only child sucks, I felt like I was Malcolm in the middle lol.

Hey! I too the eldest daughter for my parents with two brothers. They are expecting a lot from me. The thing is sometimes they are scolding me for the mistakes, my brothers did. They are telling that on seeing me only, my brothers doing such things. Really I hate that!

you are not the only one facing such problems. i was in your position some time ago. in fact i believe may situation was even worst. i use to get sulky, miserable and rebellious a lot too since that was and still s the eldest child in my family. but after a while i got use to it or maybe it is because i have really matured now things are way easier and much more fun and exciting that it use to be when i was younger. my parents hardly bother me so often and i have no need to be so rebellious.i have a believe that all bad times must come to an end so i guess it is just your time to go through it. if not all but many persons have been through similar situations as yours so just be strong and bear it because it will not last for ever.

The best you can do is follow their independent living... If the age difference is too large it is more complicated. Surely its future followed a parallel path and the lack of time that modern life many opportunities will arise. And your family will always be by your side!!