How to forget the guy that hurted you?

China
February 5, 2010 6:57am CST
Just like my topic,I want to know how to forget the guy that hurted you,and need your help. Once I met a good boy,and felt in love with him from the first sight.At that time I didn't know his feelings about me,but he was gentle and treated me very well.Suddenly,on my that birthday,he said some sweet words to me,including"i like you","I would like you to be my GF". That made me be overhappy,and I promised him. Time passed so quickly.I introduced him to my friends,they liked him except Lala,my best friend.She told me that the guy was another girls boyfriend,not my!It really shocked me!!He lied to me and cheated my feeling. The best way to prevent the further hurt was to break-up.We did!I couldn't bear this behavior! ......... Three years have passed,I always want to forget him,but I didn't!I didn't know how to forget him! Dear my friends,do you have better way to do this?
2 people like this
41 responses
@AvI0907 (230)
• Malaysia
6 Feb 10
Hi... Miranda521 The better way is select new one and delete the old one. As my advise, please do any action as soon as possible b4 step into further hurts.. Keep smiling, life will be more beautiful. (+_+)
1 person likes this
• India
6 Feb 10
I suggest u to dump him from your life and give a space from some other guy it would be better for you. Try to forget him as possible as u can and try to be happy with some one else and please don't forgive him OK.
1 person likes this
@writersedge (22563)
• United States
6 Feb 10
Keep busy. Watch comedies, read books, meditate and pray (or whatever you believe in and if you don't believe in anything, skip that). Find another to love. In time you will find someone very special. Some people are hard to forget. Not sure if this was your first serious love, but that could be part of the problem-first loves are really hard to forget. Join clubs, go where nice guys and people usually hang out. Check people out before you date them, etc. I was hurt very badly like you with the first guy I fell for, but he had tons of girlfriends besides me. He got drunk one night and confessed to me. Like you, it took me a long time to get over him. But now I'm happily married and don't give that idiot a thought, until this discussion. Bottom line, there is someone way better out there for you. It will take time, but you will find each other. Peace and love.
@myzire72 (1154)
• Singapore
6 Feb 10
Dear miranda, I understand that love can be irrational at times. You knew jolly well that the guy is a flirt, but you still can't seem to get him out of your mind. I believe somewhere deep down in you, you still secretly harbor the belief that he is not such a person, am I right? Why don't you try to let go? Decide NOW that you won't want to have anything to do with that flirt anymore. Then let go of your love for him. You can imagine letting go of a balloon and let it disappear into the atmosphere, out of sight forever. I'm sure somewhere along the way, another guy out there deserves your love more.
• Philippines
6 Feb 10
hmmm nice question..in my own opinion, it's really hard to forget a person that makes you cry because i know that you love that guy much..and for me, you don't have to ignore him just because he hurt you..instead, make friends with him, by that,you will feel better rather than to cry and feel the hurt made by him..
1 person likes this
@richauni (108)
• India
6 Feb 10
i think, i should honestly tell you that i dont know but i think we should forget that person and never think about that guy who hurtred you if that person has done this thing first time then we should leave it but menior time then we never talk to that guy.
1 person likes this
• India
6 Feb 10
the best way is find another man , new memories are takeover old memories.
• India
7 Feb 10
now do u have a new boy friend?
• China
7 Feb 10
Yes,new memories are takeover old memories,and happ memories are takeover sad memories.
@bingchen (1119)
• China
7 Feb 10
i find that you should start to find your parnter again.it is easy to forget him.i have experience like yours and never forget for several years and still live alone.although it is good way to cure my scar.but living alone make me sad and espcially miss him.so i start a new love and find my happyness,so you should open your heart and start to find new love.i believe that you can find your heart's love.
• China
7 Feb 10
Thank you so much. Now I have a good boyfriend,who loves me very much,so do I.I find that when i started this new relationship,I am more and more happy,and never thought of the exBF.
• United States
6 Feb 10
I was really sad when Alok and I split up because we had been together for a long time, then I woke up one day and I realized that I was a great person who deserved someone who would be better to me. I just decided that i didn't need a guy to validate me and I stopped caring. Blocked his email, destroyed pictures and letters. I feel better now.
• China
6 Feb 10
Every one have experienced such a things before he/she met their Mr./Ms.Right.There is nothing at all.One has gone,there would be another one waiting there.
@Jhaszy (234)
• Philippines
6 Feb 10
Girl,your still very young, you can still met much better than him..in my experienced,the more i want to forget him,the more i cant,so just keep myself busy to my mind could not have time to think of him,but when im alone in bed there he is again occupying my mind and would not let me sleep,but as time pass by he will slowly steeping out of your life,you may not completely forget him,but the pain is still not there when you think of him,and you will learn that in life is like that..you win some you lose some..mine is much difficult to forget dear,bcos we have a child that its like a mini him version,alhtoug just like you i havent forgotten him and maybe i will not,but i dont feel much pain now...later maybe if i fall in love again,thats the time i would know i dont have feelings for him..hey check out my discussion im sure you can relate..have a nice day!
• China
6 Feb 10
Most of the times,I think I have already forgotten him.But at some certain times,i thought of him and felt heartache.He was still in my heart,though occupied a little space.
@bystander (2292)
• Philippines
6 Feb 10
don't forget the guy, miranda. otherwise, you may cross path, be friends, and trust the guy again. but this time, the guy will be in another guy's body, with another name, but basically the same -- in character and in deed. what i am saying is don't forget people, or more appropriately, bad guys, who inflict pain and do harm, they are always there waiting for the opportunity to hurt or take advantage of other people... next time, be more discreet... probity, which i know you have, will guide you... you have lessons from the past to help you...
@bystander (2292)
• Philippines
7 Feb 10
remember them not for the pain, but for the lessons we've learned....
• China
6 Feb 10
thank you for your response,really remind me. maybe we should forget them,but remember them.After all,they are part of our past life.
@lilyye (15)
• China
6 Feb 10
Time heals everything!!!
• China
6 Feb 10
I always believe this.
@meldred (94)
5 Feb 10
just accept the reality that you are not mean to be. Learn to forgive Him. Also try to open your heart again to other guys...for sure you will forget him.
• China
6 Feb 10
Sometimes,I still remembered him, with full heartache.I never want to keep the memory of him,I want to forget him`
6 Feb 10
keep yourself busy & have some fun.
@lylisal (78)
• Mexico
6 Feb 10
Let to think about the situation, every time that u do, u living again the situation, first let it pass, live ur present and the time really help u to forget.
• China
7 Feb 10
Just let it go!I can live well without him,who was not worth love.
@clocks123 (1225)
• United States
5 Feb 10
you won't forget him. he is someone you opened your heart to. He lied to you and had another girlfriend which isn't a good boyfriend to have or to have a relationship with. You will find a guy who really loves you and who deserves you. the best to you.
• China
6 Feb 10
I hope all would come just like what you said. The falsifier doesn't deserve love.
@unique16 (1531)
• United States
5 Feb 10
Hello Miranda521, Yes, I broke up with my boyfriend for over 10 years. I am in 40's. Yes, I am out dating again. It not easy but I am learning alot about me. Forgiveness of the old boyrfriend is the key to move one with a free spirit. Remember he lied to you. You did nothing wrong and was this your first major boyfriend? You will fined someones esle that will make your heart flutter. You are young so the odds arevery good for you. Where in my case a lot harder to do since so many are married or could care less about a marriage again from the wifes taking them to cleaners etc... You will fined another guy. This is a learning curve. You found out you do not like guys who lie too you etc... Good Luck Sincerely unique16
• China
6 Feb 10
Dear Unique16,you've deeply inspired me,thank you.and I wish you would meet a good guy that deserves you.Good luck.
@olisaur (1922)
• United States
5 Feb 10
The best way to forget a guy is to spend all your time surrounded by the people that love you unconditionally- you best friends! ^-^ Love hurts, everyone has their heart broken sometime.
• China
6 Feb 10
Love hurts,everyone has their heart broken sometime. Right!I think so. Love can make people laugh and make people cry.
@tarapot (144)
• Philippines
5 Feb 10
Get busy! Get busy with school, with work, with friends and get busy making yourself beautiful. You have to move on, you can do it like anyone did. Refrain from thinking about him. Think that you are the most precious person and it was his lost.
• China
6 Feb 10
yeah,that was his lost,i like this words. Making ourselves more beautiful,more chaming,that is what we should do.
• Indonesia
5 Feb 10
I think you still can't forgive him for everything he has done to you, that's why you can't forget him. You should give your forgiveness to him, so u can really released from him. I ever had a situation like you, when i broke up with my ex, i really hate him, i cursed him that i would never forgive him. But that makes me really hard to forget everything about him, the more i hate, the more i remember all the things he has done to me. So i start to forgive him, and now i feel more released than before.
• China
6 Feb 10
yes,i couldn't forgive him ever.I remember how he lied to me and he hurt me.How can i forgive him,such a bad guy!That really bothers me~!
@gtloquero (271)
• Philippines
6 Feb 10
hi miranda. it really takes time to heal ur wounded heart. the best things i could advice for you are to keep yourself busy, accept the reality and wake up! hehe godbless..
• China
6 Feb 10
As time goes by, I will forget him thorough.He didn't deserve my love.I will meet the right guy.