Just being a mom leaves me feeling overwhelmed!

hello cream, Hahahaha...cheer up dear,you are not alone. I am a single mom,striving hard to feed and make a living for my three grown up kids. My daughter will be at university this coming school opening,and,ohhh,i am looking forward for her scholarship. When my kids were young,maybe 5 years ago,i always tell myself that,once they've grown(teeners)they will behave more and,less mischief or could be a great help to me. But,i am totally wrong...gosh,i had the worst headache much paining then my migraine once they started arguing for petty things. From watching movies..using computers(my second son's computer need a lot of repair)so,my 2 sons take turn using one computer. And my daughter and i share my laptop(well,at least my daughter behave well) But with my 2 sons...my world is always in a disaster each time they start arguing and fighting over small things. Sometimes,i just ignore them and closed my room and put play songs in almost maximum volume. Then,they will come knocking my door asking me to lower the volume[em]cheering[/em I also feels i am a bad mom...but God knows how i really tried to be a good mom maybe not the best. And when they're all gone for school...and i am all alone at home...i missed the fightings Ahhh,kids can drive me crazy

You are definitely not alone. I am going through a lot right now with my kids too. And it seems as if it's the worst days when they forget something or don't feel well or decide to start fighting over something. You're not doing anything wrong, sometimes it's just too much. Hang in there, it gets better when they're older, but it never really goes totally away. Part of what being a mom is all about.

I think all of us feel overwhelmed at times. We feel like we aren't good moms, or that our kids of out of control and there's nothing we can do to stop it. My mother in law told me when my son was a baby that motherhood took alot of prayers, and I would shed alot of tears and sleepless nights. She was right. But the rewards so far outweigh the problems, that I wouldn't trade being a mother for the wealth of the world. Keep your chin up, and just keep doing the best you can!

Hi Cream You are not a bad mum. We all have days like this when it seems like everything that can go wrong does. I know I do I am mum of five and sometimes I just feel like screaming when things like that happen. I usually just take some time out for myself to calm down and relax then go back to solving the problem. Sounds to me like you could do with a break.

All i ca really say, is there kids, adn these sort of things will happen, and by no means feeling overwhelmed and what not makes you a bad mom. I've been struggling with this myself for the past little while. My son is only 10 months old, but refuses to sleep, especially during the night, and my boyfriend works full time so it is solely up to me to stay up all night with him, and at the same time, im also responsible for doing all the laundry, and keeping the place clean, and making sure all the ends meet financially. With everything we deal with on a regular basis, whether your a new mom, or a seasoned mom, we all get overwhelmed, and have feelings of just not being good enough. But in the long run, all that matters is that our kids are happy, have good morals, and that we have done everything we can to send them on the right path in life. And sometimes after we've done everything we can they still stray off and head in the wrong direction, but that doesnt mean its your fault. They have to stumble and fall sometimes to find out for themselves that they may not be making the right decisions. Our job is to be there when they realise that. Anyways, maybe its time to take a few hours to yourself, have a nice bath, or sit back and read a book. I've learned that as much as there are always things you need to do, you also NEED to take a little me time and re energize your batteries. Or even pamper yourself a bit, to pick up your self esteem again. Good luck with it all.

Dont you worry you are not alone in this coz most moms experienced it. Even thou i'm just a new mom i also experienced bad days. As a consolation to all moms out there, its not everyday that we get a bad day so cheer up! We all will have another new experience on the following day. Enjoy life and take a break once in a while coz we all need one esp after a hectic day.

I feel for you! Yes, there are days when I feel like a bad mom or just overwhelmed by being mom and feel like I can't take on anymore. But it passes and then there are days when I feel blessed to have such wonderful children (they really are good kids). It's just one of those phases that come and go. You aren't the only one and I'm sure each and every mom here and in the world can relate to what you are feeling....even the ones that have help.

Hi Cream it can get like that believe me When my Children where little I had to work (and I mean I had to) I had to look after the Children and the House My Ex Husband did nothing apart from enjoy a single Man's Life even though he was married that is why I had to work When they where really small I worked Part time, then would collect them from School, go home, give them their Lunch clean, wash, dry Clothes and so on Then I would cook Tea and then time to see the Children again, bath, PJ's on and then bedtime So at times I used to be tired it was hard to get up the next Morning When they where older as in their Teens, I worked full time, then had my time with them, where we talked, or if they had a Problem we would talk about it, then I would tidy a bit (sometimes I did not get home till 8pm) then at Weekends I would clean the House from top to bottom, do the Washing, ironing and all that So it can be very overwhelming, but believe me I would go through it all again for my Children so no you are not a bad Mum at all it is all part of it

Hello Sweetheart You poor thing...been there done that!! I raised 7 children...all have been through high school All have taken some college and still are. PHEWWWW Just take a deep breath... put one foot after the other It will all be ok Huge hugs xoxoxoxoxo

hi cream97 you sound like a p age out of my own mom experiences when my son was little, no you are not doing anything wrong. there are days like that for all moms of little children. when one things goes wrong at least two more must follow, its the law of three. I am sure you will find a ton of other mylotters who have had the same experiences where everything seems to go wrong at once ,and the feelings of inadequacy are common. None of these make you a bad mom, in fact from what I read here you are a good, conscientious mom,

A typical case of Indian Mom

Its very normal for us mother to feel that way sometimes so just unwhind for a while from a very stressful work you have. I just want to make it clear to you that not all fathers can do what we do for we are considered a superwomen for we can manage our time well with our work, family, making a home. Just take it easy sometimes.

That's the wrong conclusion. When we hear the word 'housewife', we always think that it's easy. WRONG! It is really hard work. You have to clean the house, cook the food, send and fetch kids, serve your husband, wash and iron clothes. My! I tried it before and I failed! It was tough work. So I prefer to be a career woman and I share household chores with my husband. We also share the burden of disciplining our children. It takes two to tango, right?!

Having the responsibility of being the caretaker of so many is strenuous. But I also feel that you are given what you cannot handle. Try to focus on the good that they do rather on the bad. I know its hard to do at first but it does get easier. This is life so try to embrace rather than fight it. These children look up to you, trust you, and love you for who are not what you do for them. That will come when they have they have children of their own, lol. The respect, the laughter, and the amazement of you did it. Of course you have to set goals, rewards, and pick your battles that are not acceptable behavior. Accidents will happen and also being forgetful. They feel bad and react on how you react. I have one that for some reason enjoys taking things apart to see how they work or wants to fix things. A juice spills they want to clean it and make a huge mess. I also had the painter in the house. So I eventually bought an easel designated an area where this will be done and let them go at it. I looked at the creativity and learned that they too need an outlet to express themselves and be an individual. I also learned that sometimes negative attention is better than no attention in their eyes. They may be vying for your attention to notice them. Its hard. Maybe they can be enrolled in after school program, A VPK ( Voluntary Pre-Kindergarten)program for the 4 year old. Missing clothing is awful when your on a budget. Try the reward system every time they remember to do something they get a star on a chart or a check mark. After getting so many they get a prize, it does have to anything big, just something that they earned it. This should make them feel good and hopefully want to keep trying harder. I also give a small allowance so they use their money to buy things. This one has been very effective. They do not want these items. Once they do they start over in saving and realize how they are out an item. A harsh reality that shows them responsibility. Now if it cold out I will not deprive them of a new jacket or sweater. I am sure you understand what I am saying. They have to have reasonable goals and limits set for this to start working. It was hard at first in my household but it eventually started working. I do not sweat the little stuff. Teachers are teaching your children to held accountable for their actions. Shouldn't parents do the same? Take care and try to relax sometime during the day. You also need a break. Take a minute timeout when you start to feel overwhelmed and look at the big picture is it worth a confrontation or can you suggest doing it a different way to them? Take care.

I feel the same way sometimes. We are so stretched and there is always so much to do and never enough time. Your not a bad mom..your just busy.

We all feel the same way...but sometimes we think we are the only ones. Some days are better than others..so probably when you are having a bad day the mom you know it's having a good one.

Being a mum is a bit like juggling hot coals,every time you let that one go,there is another one just falling into your open palm. Many dads don't realize that it is like that at all, they see that you are the one with all the hugs and they are the one that does all the hard stuff. I think being the mum is much much harder as you are just expected to provide all the right things at the right time from nowhere and do it all while balancing a pile of plates and a pile of clean clothes. One of my friends with a son the same age as mine when asked if her son could come and play ,consulted her diary! She had after school clubs and having to go collect her husband from the station to fit in too. You aren't a bad mum at all you sound like you work hard.